Pinhead Apr 23, 2024 Woke up today to find my sleeping sounds had turned off overnight. I listened as, slowly, my mind was invaded by hissing and screeching.
Woke up today to find my sleeping sounds had turned off overnight. I listened as, slowly, my mind was invaded by hissing and screeching.
Pinhead Apr 21, 2024 Three years ago today, my life shifted catastrophically. Nothing will ever be the same.
Pinhead Apr 21, 2024 I get fleeting moments where I remember how deeply happy I felt before tinnitus. They vanish just as quickly, replaced by noise.
I get fleeting moments where I remember how deeply happy I felt before tinnitus. They vanish just as quickly, replaced by noise.
Pinhead Apr 20, 2024 My girlfriend complains that I don't listen to half of what she says. Trust me, I'm trying.
Pinhead Apr 19, 2024 Get up and prepare for another day in hell without a single moment of happiness or relief. I am in hell.
Get up and prepare for another day in hell without a single moment of happiness or relief. I am in hell.
Pinhead Apr 18, 2024 I'm really struggling today. I can't keep myself focused. I feel like leaving work and never coming back. My brain won't shut up.
I'm really struggling today. I can't keep myself focused. I feel like leaving work and never coming back. My brain won't shut up.
Pinhead Apr 17, 2024 The auditory nerve is capable of feeling pain. I may not have hyperacusis but, instead, nerve damage. That can be treated.
The auditory nerve is capable of feeling pain. I may not have hyperacusis but, instead, nerve damage. That can be treated.
Pinhead Apr 17, 2024 Looking for a single sign of improvement. I've tried to be so positive, but it never pans out. It's just pure, uncut, false hope.
Looking for a single sign of improvement. I've tried to be so positive, but it never pans out. It's just pure, uncut, false hope.
Pinhead Apr 17, 2024 Absolutely terrible today. Both ears ache and my right is blaring. Wondering if it's infected. It's unbearable.
Absolutely terrible today. Both ears ache and my right is blaring. Wondering if it's infected. It's unbearable.
Pinhead Apr 15, 2024 I'd like to share some songs that echo my experience. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vz1Onw9Qk-E
Pinhead Apr 15, 2024 Next Sunday is my three-year tinnitus anniversary. I plan on getting completely wasted. Things will worsen on MY terms, goddammit!
Next Sunday is my three-year tinnitus anniversary. I plan on getting completely wasted. Things will worsen on MY terms, goddammit!
Pinhead Apr 15, 2024 My friend decided to go for a walk with me. I think he quickly realized that it wouldn't be relaxing, more like A to B as fast as possible.
My friend decided to go for a walk with me. I think he quickly realized that it wouldn't be relaxing, more like A to B as fast as possible.
Pinhead Apr 14, 2024 Sometimes the ringing spikes so loudly it makes my eyes unfocus. Absolutely insane.
Pinhead Apr 12, 2024 I recall how hopeful I was maybe a year after this started. It's only worsened and hope for improvement is gone.
I recall how hopeful I was maybe a year after this started. It's only worsened and hope for improvement is gone.
Pinhead Apr 9, 2024 The reactivity is the worst part. Not being able to withstand traveling in cars, trains, and buses has left me totally stranded. Not living.
The reactivity is the worst part. Not being able to withstand traveling in cars, trains, and buses has left me totally stranded. Not living.
Pinhead Apr 5, 2024 Every SBUTT is a literal traumatic experience. I start to shake and my adrenaline shoots up. I panic. Two or three a day is actual torture.
Every SBUTT is a literal traumatic experience. I start to shake and my adrenaline shoots up. I panic. Two or three a day is actual torture.
Pinhead Apr 4, 2024 One of the most unbearable parts of being disabled is the unfathomable weight of no longer being able to create. It's just pure hell.
One of the most unbearable parts of being disabled is the unfathomable weight of no longer being able to create. It's just pure hell.
Pinhead Apr 4, 2024 I've noticed that things like brakes squealing are much more abrasive to me now. I must be getting hyperacusis, or I'm just more sensitive.
I've noticed that things like brakes squealing are much more abrasive to me now. I must be getting hyperacusis, or I'm just more sensitive.
Pinhead Apr 3, 2024 Took a 5 day vacation to NYC/Philly. Every day was just too much. It's all just too much.
Pinhead Mar 28, 2024 I slept in silence last night but woke up with hissing, highly reactive ears. Why?
Pinhead Mar 27, 2024 Self-help or motivational content no longer applies to you once you're disabled like this. Those things lose their importance. Just survive.
Self-help or motivational content no longer applies to you once you're disabled like this. Those things lose their importance. Just survive.
Pinhead Mar 26, 2024 SBUTTs are like my brain reminding me: "This is my life. Not yours. Don't forget that. I can make this worse for you."
SBUTTs are like my brain reminding me: "This is my life. Not yours. Don't forget that. I can make this worse for you."
Pinhead Mar 25, 2024 No break. I still have to work. I experience SBUTTs at least twice a day. My family and friends expect me to act normal. I am in hell.
No break. I still have to work. I experience SBUTTs at least twice a day. My family and friends expect me to act normal. I am in hell.
Pinhead Mar 20, 2024 What should I do in remembrance of myself on the three-year anniversary of my death? It's coming soon.
What should I do in remembrance of myself on the three-year anniversary of my death? It's coming soon.
Pinhead Mar 20, 2024 I miss being active so, so much. I just want to be back in the gym. I want to be outside.