How to be happy?

How can I ever be happy when I know I'm going to be left like this for life? Every day and night a battle, tying to pretend to be happy for my kids, yet crumbling when there're asleep. How to be happy again, truly happy and genuinely happy. I fear bedtime, I feel the cosyness of my sheets on my skin snd hear the horrendous noise pouring out of my ears, it's a horrible contradiction.

 

Not for life @Penelope33 . I know how hard its trust me. I am confident and sure that soon we will have treatment . By now i don't even care much for cure anymore (although it would be great) but i know and have faith that theres a treatment coming .

 

One word- habituation.

 

Hi @Penelope33. I'm so sorry you're feeling this way and I think many of us have to some degree been where you are.

How to be happy in the face of suffering, well, that's something people far more wise than I have been trying to figure out for a very, very long time. Good news is, you don't have to suffer from tinnitus, habituation will prove to be a "cure" for you in time. Tinnitus will not be the center of everything forever.

All I know is that I felt that contradiction you're talking about so keenly a year ago - my bed was no longer comfortable, all the trimmings of home seemed to be cruel reminders of how easy life was before, my whole world was colored by tinnitus. I asked the same questions you're asking right now. I'm happy again and I really did not see how that could happen before.

Hang in there, thing can be good and light and lovely again

 

Thank you, I really hope things will change for the better but it's like facing a fight with lions every moment of every day.

 

It will get better.

It's an overused quote, but "When you're going through hell, keep going." Keep moving forward and doing little things to calm yourself and let yourself heal, make sure you are getting sleep, maybe go talk to a caring psychologist, do yoga, read, play videogames - whatever gives you even a second where you have to focus on something other than T. In time, that T will get less and less terrible until it's not terrible at all. Just keep living.

 

@Penelope33

you are planning your life/future around your tinnitus, you have it for quiet a few
months but it has become the focus of your life, eventually your brain will stop giving
so much importance to it and you will be in a much better position.

 

Hang in there I have had T for a long time. I have been were you are . My faith in God , my husband and children keeped me going. I still have my days don't get me wrong but I look back on how far I've come and i will keep keeping on . It does get easier and yes the brain finds away to adapt. Hang in there stay busy, take a bath , play uplifting music, give your kids a big hug .You can overcome. !!!

 

Hey jewellanne1010, I totally echo much of what has already been shared with you above!! I know it's difficult to truly grasp that you will ever get thru this! But YOU WILL .....

Please read my post from January:

https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/habituate.3120/#post-37298

It's all true and I am still going strong today!! (With the occasional bad day here and there )

I wish you peace and strength and joy!! Know that we here on TT are a great place to find support (we get it) and a wonderful shoulder to cry on!!

 

Penelope, you're only 6 months in, all of us here have been down the same road as you. Keep on reading others situations, and various posts, realize you are not alone, far from it. I am a few years in now and am doing much better than I was a year ago. Some excellent reading can be found right here on ask the Dr. Have a look....

 

Stop being sad and start being happy.

I'm not trying to be flippant.

You wrote you have kids. Be thankful for them. Be happy. Many people cannot have kids, would give anything to have children. You have priceless treasures.

When my T began, I was a wreck. But after a while I made a conscious effort find things in my life for which I should be thankful. My kids. My wife. My health. Try this. Walk around your home. Look at all the things that bring joy to your life. Look at what you have and be happy for it.

 

Don't just hang in there, don't wait for habituation, and don't waste your time hoping for a cure.
Get busy. Take action.
Measure your response. Do NOT measure your T.
Do not listen to, or for your T. Do not spend one more second even thinking about it.
Think about your response. Measure your response.
Be honest.
One word of your post was a measurement, "Crumbling."
Now start regularly measuring the degree of crumbling, or other feelings you have.
You'll see a change.