Bang My Head Off the Wall

I have been hearing a slight ringing in my ears on and off for a while now but around June of this year, it became really loud, more so in my left side but it's also there on the right.

Just recently, I noticed that when listening to the news on tv, the voices had a slight distortion occasionally. I went to see the doctor believing it to be wax blocking my ears to be told that my ears are perfectly clear and I had tinnitus. I left the surgery in tears as I had been reading about tinnitus and knew there was no cure. I was devastated.

Now about 6 weeks later, I am in bits, not coping with the noise at all. It's got worse and sometimes is so loud, I just want to bang my head off the wall to try and make the noise disappear. I can't come to terms that I am going to hear this noise for the rest of my life.

If I am in a noisy environment, even for a short while, my hearing seems to dull and the noise increases. What is happening? Is my hearing affected? I don't want to have to wear a hearing aid.

I am at loggerheads with my husband because I am irritable and feel that he doesn't understand what I'm going through or thinking. I know tinnitus isn't life threatening and there are so many people worse off than me. But it's not like an ache or pain which you can treat.

This horrible noise is stuck there and I just feel helpless. I have now bought a sound generator and some speakers for my pillow to see if that helps me get back to sleep when this noise is ringing so loudly in my head during the night.

Have I wasted my money or will this maybe help? Is there anything else I can do? I have bought musicians ear plugs so I can still continue to follow the sport I love without damaging my hearing further but it seems like I am going to have to give up so many things I enjoy because they involve noise.

It's like I'm going to have to change my whole way of life and I'm not coping at all with the situation. I don't think I have any tears left to be honest. Just feelings of despair now.

Does this get any better? What can I do........

 

Wait 6 months (or six years) and see how it goes.
(ENT gave you an audiogram?)

 

well that was a really helpful reply

 

Thank you.
You didn't answer my question though.

 

I agree...

 

Hi Norma

Not sure what you want people to but i agree with @undecided . You will have to wait it out to see if it improves. Have you had your hearing tested? If not i think this may give an answer as to why you have tinnitus.

 

So sorry to read that you are suffering.

I know how that goes ...

I think an audiogram and tympanogram would be a good idea if you can get in to see an audiologist.

Its good that youve been seen a dr to ensure you dont have an infection or wax build up in your canal/other..

The voice distortion you mention sounds like misophonia.

The worst thing anyone can do is tell you that there is nothing you can do to help your tinnitus. This simply isnt true.

take a look at julian cowan hills youtube video series on tinnitus. There is hope ....

m.youtube.com> watch

what you are currently going through is very common in the early stages of t onset.

your amagdala (part of the brain that is involved in the fight and flight response) is very active at
the moment.

my suggestion to you is to listen to Julians advice, and work on calming your central nervous system down. Youre going to be totally fine. You are safe.

i know that feeling of wanting to bang the noise out of my head. Its an awful place to be. This will pass.

I want to reassure you that your brain has better things to be doing than monitoring a phantom noise. Easier said than done i know, but try not to give it the attention it so craves. Perhaps also have a look at the back to silence threads. I know many people have been helped by following the advice in this thread.

whenever i read positive stories of habituation, it is interesting to note that ACCEPTANCE seems to be the key word ... many say that it is only at the point of acceptance that they start to move forward.

There are ancedotal reports of tinnitus going away for some. Even if yours is here to stay, dont despzir. Eventually, your brain will start to filter out the noise or you will learn to no longer react negatively to it. In other words, you will habituate. This can be as good as a cure.

your t sounds reactive. Youll find lots of posts about that on here.

You wont know if your hearing is affected for certain without an audiogram. I believe there are on.ine audiograms, but im thinking they may not be as reliable as an official audio. Anyhow, someone might be able to suggest a site.

If you have a hearing impairment along with the t, and hearing aides improve your symptoms, why wouldnt you want to consider this as an option? You might even want to consider white noise generators.

The beginning is an emotional rollercoaster. Totally normal.

this will inevitably impact on relationships. A very lonely and trying time for many because it is so difficult to convey the despair and utter fear that can accompany a symptom for which youve been told there is no cure for.

the sound generator sounds like a great idea.

You will adapt. Promise.

my suggestions in short to you are...

. Plenty of rem sleep
. Consider mindfulness meditation ( To get out of flight or fight response mode), yoga, tai chi, or other mind body practice
. Use your sound generator/other for distraction
. Consider ketogenic diet/intermittent fasting
. Exercise
. Fun things
. Force yourself to keep going e.g, work, sport, hobbies. Great youre now protecting your hearing.
. Consider neuromodulation
. Visit julian hills videos
. Visit back to silence thread

One last message..

youre not helpless. Your life is not over. You will habituate and youll look back one day and wonder what all the fuss was about ...

i hope this helpsx

 

Go get an audiogram asap. Many hearing aid places (not doctor's offices) give a free hearing test. Have them print it out or make a copy of it and then if you want (your choice of course) you could share it with certain members of this group to see if a hearing aid would benefit tinnitus. If you have the money I really would suggest an extended audiogram test that goes to 12khz. You will have to call around for that though (probably a doctor's office that deals with hearing...maybe an ENT might do it) The regular audiogram only goes to 8khz. Keep in mind human hearing range can be 20 hz to 20 khz. Don't worry about the way it looks on you. I am a guy and I wore hearing aids for a long time and nobody ever said something and when I brought it up a year later to a girl that liked me she said she had no idea I wore hearing aids. The reason is that I had my hair a little over my ears. Since you are a woman your long hair can be over your ears and should hide the hearing aids. They are a non drug way that can reduce the perception of tinnitus and made me feel a lot better when I got them and reduced some of the T. In some it can completely reduce the perception of T. In addition to boosting ambient sounds which reduce T, many hearing aids have maskers which you can turn on to hopefully mask the ringing. It is a nice feature if you get really tired of the ringing. Also, the hearing aids usually can be returned to get your money back. Some places there is a fee but other places there isn't. You can call around. Try a pair on in their office or whatever and bring a little portable radio and see if you can still hear your ringing with the hearing aids in. I would say start with that. Your goal is to calm down as much as possible now because stress can amplify T for many so hopefully this will help.

Also, they can make hearing aids really small now that come with remotes and things that hook up to your smart phone. If small size is very important you can get a mini-RIC but they also make RIC which I think can be cool if they have a dual rocker switch. For example, on one hearing aid you can lower and raise the amplification and on the other you can lower and raise the masker volume. Let me know if you think this is all a good idea.

 

You pretty much sounded like me 5 years ago. Whether your tinnitus gets better or not, your coping skills will. As for the sound machines and pillow, I think it's a great idea. I went one step further having purchased a hearing aid with Bluetooth technology allowing me to play masking sounds anytime and anywhere.

 

Hi Norma,
I agree with others here who have suggested that you have your hearing tested. It's too early to know if your tinnitus is permanent but if it is, you will not be as frightened of it as time moves along. It always tugs at my heartstrings when I read the posts from new sufferers who are so frustrated and scared. I have been where you are now.