Feeling Like I'll Never Be Normal

I feel like I can never be normal. I used to have anxiety before tinnitus but now it's so strong. I keep thinking "I can't live like this." I look around at other people and their lives are so joyful. I feel like I'll never be happy or normal.

And tinnitus just gets louder so I'm terrified of what will happen. I can't imagine my future. I can't go to college anymore. I can't go outside with family and friends. I don't know who would want to marry me. I have anxiety all of the time and I don't think anyone could handle all of it.

I'm even a burden upon my family. I was going to go to college but because of the constant anxiety I can't.

I don't know what the future holds for me.

I just wish I could have a normal life

 

You can have a normal life and no one knows what the future holds, the only way to know it and in my opinion the best one too is to create your future . And you will be happy again .. and the tinnitus will lose importance. Yes you will be always ill as long there is no cure, but this illness is very bearable compared to others. Read some success stories here and you see how many people live a good life.

 

I haven't felt normal in the past eight months, and the feeling of wanting to die is still there all the time, but to a lesser degree, like something nice to have but I can live without it (ha!). Also, I haven't cried over this whole ordeal for about a month now. I've also started enjoying again things like good food and exciting TV shows. I've come a long way from crying every night and just lying in bed, doing nothing.

As much as I want to feel fully normal again, this is my new normal. It's not ideal but it's mine, and I'll do my best to make the most out of it while I'm still around.