Well...this is the path I chose due to stupidity and a lack of common sense. So I'm laying in bed next to my noise generator trying to sleep but my thoughts on this situation are keeping me awake. Makes me angry that a condition like this is so unknown to the world. I struggle everyday with it, taking in all the information I can about habituation and so forward. I try to mentally tell myself "it's just a sound yada yada" but it's hard sometimes because I keep reflecting on the damage I have caused myself. I wore loud headphones everyday for almost a year and hadn't the slightest hint that this condition was out there. You would think they'd put warnings on headphone packages. On top of that, every ENT, audiologist and neurologist are your worst enemy when it comes to t. They just make you pay for an appointment and just play dumb and try to dance around the issue. All the information about this condition is contradictory. It's not life threatening but it can have a negative impact on your quality of life? What's worse? A disease that will eventually kill you or something that makes you want to kill yourself? I understand there are people with t who never think of suicide but come on. The world needs to start taking this condition seriously. Loud noise was my life. I thought hearing loss was all that could happen but that is still very stupid and an ignorant way to think. I should have known better. I should of had more common sense. All this chaos I've been through the past 10 months could have easily been avoided if I wouldn't of been such an idiot. I found out about decibel levels afterwards. I wish I could go back and operate within the db threshold. I used to love video editing, gaming and skyping with my friends but that's all altered now because of this noise. I'm already in a wheelchair due to a birth defect. Now I got this to deal with. I hate it. I regret being so reckless. I do think of suicide a lot but what if hell is real?? Who ever read this all the way through, I'm sorry for my long rant. I'm just very sad and regretful. I'd give anything to hear dead silence once again.