How Do You Keep Positivity Up?

Discussion in 'Support' started by Ludvik, Dec 16, 2016.

    1. Ludvik

      Ludvik Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      23/11/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Ear Infection + Noise Induced
      Hi guys, just another vent session.

      Just wondering what techniques, and strategies you guys like to employ to keep positivity up?

      My T is still at it's early stages, so my main coping strategy has been to tell myself that it will get better, that things will improve. But it's only been steadily getting louder these past few weeks and I am finding it quite impossible to keep my mood up and to stay positive. It's kinda like.. Having that hope that it'll improve, actually is making me sadder as I don't see that improvement.

      I've read posts about habituating can begin when you start to accept the sound, and the situation that I'm in. I guess I'm not quite able to accept it at this point, especially as it continues to increase in severity. Unfortunately at this point masking/sound enrichment doesn't help as much anymore (though I still use them)

      The most helpful thing for me so far is to talk to my friends and family, and Xanax helps some nights. Posting here helps a lot. I cherish moments where I'm still able to laugh. I've been trying to quit gaming and internet, but I think at this point any sort of distraction is a good idea. Thankfully the self blame is easing up a bit, I'm starting to catch myself when I start thinking of what ifs, and realizing it's not useful and only increases suffering.
       
    2. vegasjon

      vegasjon Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2012
      I don't. I look for signs I will regain my hearing and silence the ringing and I see nothing remotely on the horizon.

      And I get depressed.

      Sorry.
       
    3. Alue
      No Mood

      Alue Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic Trauma
      You can try not to spend so much time on here and stop looking for a cure. I feel a bit hypocritical saying that. I knew I should have done that in my early days but never did. I was obsessed with tinnitus and researched everything I could. My T was just too loud to ignore. But for some people that are able to distract themselves, or those that are able to mask it, doing so early on could make a big difference.

      One thing I wondered when I first got tinnitus and I still wonder today is if how we react to the onset of tinnitus can have an affect on the long term prognosis of the condition.
       
    4. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Ludvik

      Ludvik Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      23/11/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Ear Infection + Noise Induced
      I definitely spend far too much time here reading and thinking about my T, in one way it helps but there's a certain amount of obsession to it. I'll try to limit my use from now on.
       
    5. MikeGreen
      Uninvolved

      MikeGreen Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Spotify
      Well in my opinion if you quit internet and gaming, and you dont do much. You will be focusing on the sounds 24/7. Im not saying go be a gamer. Im just pointing out its important to draw attention away. Whether its drawing, watching movies, chatting with friends, doing work or gaming. You decide. But focusing on it every single second will only make it louder, like Michael Leigh explained it makes your brain focus on it and make it louder.
       
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    6. Rubenslash

      Rubenslash Member

      Location:
      Zurich
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Bad luck and bad decisions
      Keep yourself busy. When watching a movie/studying/working/socializing with friends, you will think less about your T.
      For some reason, my T is often lower in volume after I had a good time with friends. Unfortunately it returns again to its normal level after a couple of hours.

      And of course I do believe that a cure will be available someday. That also helps at being positive.

      Most difficult remains at night. Recently I had a night where I literally slept 1 hour and I was just being awake for over 6 hours. I am trying to avoid sleeping pills for now as I do not want to be too dependent on them, but I will see in the future.
       
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    7. Kelvin

      Kelvin Member Benefactor

      Location:
      UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Dental Work
      Just keep busy buddy...you will have better days to come !
      I have tried lots and not found any sort of magic cure.
      If mine is bad I simply put earbuds ( no music on, or very quiet music ) in so it doesn't get worse ( spike ) with external sounds. I find it starts with no sound input at all and so must be generated by the nerves and brain. mine hates flushing toilets and metal spoons stiring in cups - figure that out !!!
      In some bizarre way you will make it easier on yourself if you learn to at least like it and not hate it.
      Trust me I know how hard that is, but it does help. Anxiety and distress comes about from your own reaction to it. Tell it to get lost and get on with something else...
      Wishing you a peaceful day soon !
       
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    8. Fangen
      Moonlighting

      Fangen Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Stockholm, Sweden
      Tinnitus Since:
      December 2nd, 2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic trauma (loud concert for 1h)
      I am big gamer as you can also tell from my avatar and it has always been my passion but been the biggest hobby of mine for the past few years. I also work in the game industry so you might understand that gaming is a big part of my life. If you love gaming, don't quit it unless it is giving you problems (addicted or something). It is a good distraction and probably helped me a lot to habituate since I had something else to do for hours and my brain had to focus on the game and not on the sound. I stopped using headphones when playing online with friends and have the sounds from the tv while having the headphones around my neck so I can still use the mic. It works for me and I didn't have to give anything up. That is my story at least. Having your tv on with sounds (or screen) on low/moderate level probably drowns out the T a bit and when you are focusing on the mission in the game you won't be listening to the T sounds. In the beginning of onset I felt rather depressed so it was hard to pick up the controller but I love games and it is my passion so I found my way back fairly quick.
       
    9. Jason C

      Jason C Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      29 May 2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Burgler Alarm
      Not easy, I know what you mean about the self blame, I can't get it out of my head, how could I be so stupid when I knew the risks and telling myself not too do it at the time. So why didnt I just stop?? It's 7 months now tortured every second of the day replaying the events.
      I don't know if I can get past it at all, the tinnitus, hearing loss and balance problems are such a reminder it's impossible not too think about it.
      By now I had hoped I would be feeling better about things but nope, still the same.
       
    10. Michael Leigh

      Michael Leigh Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Brighton, UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/1996
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced
      Positivity comes with time but it doesn't happen automatically and you have got to do some of the work yourself because no one else can do it better. Take a look at the post below to see my point:

      Positivity And Tinnitus

      For some people prolonged intrusive tinnitus can be very stressful and at times debilitating. This can sometimes lead to depression and a person may need to go on a course of antidepressants. I have often been asked in tinnitus forums and via email “It is great if you’re able to be positive, but simply telling someone to be more positive about tinnitus isn’t going to change anything”. I want to clarify here and now, that isn’t what I mean.

      Thinking more positive about tinnitus and bringing positivity into your life takes time it isn’t achieved overnight or by simply thinking to yourself “I must be positive about my life”.

      If a person wants to improve the quality of their life they have to be prepared to try and help themselves, because there is no wonder drug or operation that can cure tinnitus at this time. Unless a person faces these facts they will forever be trawling the Internet going from forum to forum complaining why there is no treatment for tinnitus when actually many of these people want a complete cure.

      I once read a newspaper article that mentioned: nineteen out of twenty medical conditions cannot be cured. Someone once told me “I don’t want to be positive about tinnitus, I hate it. Being positive wont make it go away". This is true, however, thinking more positive and bringing positivity into your life will reduce the perception on how you relate to tinnitus. CBT and TRT are based on having a positive attitude, without that these treatments aren’t effective.

      Long before CBT, TRT and the Internet came on the scene Doctors have been telling tinnitus patients, there’s no cure you’ll have to learn to live with it. Most of us know this is easier said than done.

      So how does one start to think more positive about their tinnitus and to bring positivity into their life?

      The fact that someone with tinnitus is reading this page suggests to me their tinnitus for today at least isn’t so intrusive that they are unable to function, for that I’m pleased because this is something positive, instead of lying in bed on medication doing nothing. If you are able to work that’s even better as your tinnitus isn’t so severe you’re incapacitated. I see this as something positive in a person’s life. Being able to earn a living and support yourself. Therefore, you’re able to do all the daily tasks one needs to survive in this world. You may have some difficulty granted, but you’re still achieving and that's progress.

      It is still better than someone that is visually impaired or severely disabled and unable to earn a living. Or, people with severe tinnitus that are depressed and on medication and unable to work. So by looking at our own circumstances and seeing what we’re able to do and achieve we can think more positively about ourselves. There is nothing more satisfying than being independent and I suggest you hold onto those thoughts.

      If you live by yourself consider getting a cat or a dog so your home environment won’t feel so lonely. If you have a partner and family think about spending some quality time with them, as this can help reinforce your sense of belonging, and the love that binds you together, then your T won’t make you feel so isolated. Sometimes opening up sharing your thoughts and how you feel can help immensely and keep negativity at bay.

      I have just given a synopsis of what I believe can help a person’s quality of life improve with positive thinking. It doesn’t happen overnight but a lot can be achieved when one is prepared to try. By moving forwards and taking one day at a time you can occasionally look back and see how far you have come.

      Michael
       
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    11. glynis
      Feminine

      glynis Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      2004
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Meniere's Disease
      Try to could all the positives in each day and things you can do ...
      Don't let tinnitus take awAy your smile or laughter as will only lower your mood.
      We might have to put extra effort in things to enjoy them but well worth it
      ...... lots of love glynis
       
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    12. Roseanna H

      Roseanna H Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      Janurary 2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Ear phones
      That'a great! Yeah you have to focus on the good things in life, what you can actually still do and what you have. It's so so difficult. But the the best thing you can do is change your mindset on it. You have to think it could be so much worse, i could be blind or completely deaf. There are alot of negatives to tinnitus, but it is possible to find positives too. For me, it's made me more grateful for what i have, and for the health that i do have. I don't take anything for granted anymore...like i did with silence. It's hard, and still so new to me. But we are all in this together.
       
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    13. Michael Leigh

      Michael Leigh Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Brighton, UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/1996
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced
      You are right @Roseanna H. I tell people to focus on what you can do with tinnitus instead of focusing on what you can't do. Tinnitus comes in many forms and intensities. When it is loud and intrusive, it can be very debilitating and comparable to any serious medical condition, simply because of what it can do to a person's state of mind. One only has to Google that and they will see what I mean. However, to the many people that are reading this thread, I ask to think about what I've said in my post above. The fact that you are on the computer now reading this, for today at least you are able to function and that is something positive.
      Michael
       
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    14. wags
      Wishful

      wags Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      2011
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic Trama
      This is great perspective.

      If you want to really stretch it, tinnitus has made us all more aware of how delicate and important our ears are. Now we all take strides to protect our ears. While it may seem like a downer, it's actually preventing us from doing things that would hurt us that we may not have paid attention to before, which may pay off in the long run, :)
       
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    15. Michael Leigh

      Michael Leigh Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Brighton, UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/1996
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced
      It is for this reason I cannot understand why anyone with intrusive tinnitus would risk making their tinnitus worse by listening to audio through headphones even at low volume.
       
    16. billie48
      Sunshine

      billie48 Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2009
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      not sure
      Some genius comment and advise by above posters. I guess time is a very important element as Michael nicely puts it. We can't simply change to become vibrantly & perfectly positive in a day the minute we decide to be more positive. The brain has learned old habit and it won't yield its negativity tendency that easy and fast. Old habit will take time to be undone. So the first thing is not to quit on the new approach of positivity when it doesn't seem to work. Stay on course and stick to it heaven or hell. When you fall, rise again and try.

      Sometimes when we talk about positivity in life, it may seem too big and far fetched a goal. What does it mean? OK, we may want to be more positive. But the next moment something go wrong, we may function in crisis mode again. It may happen to most people. We are just being human. So how do we try to habitually be more positive. There may be many ideas as presented above. All good ideas. I will only add that we can try to bring posivitity to the NOW, the very moment in front of us which we can do something about to make a difference or to give value to our life. If you feel bored now, try to do something interesting to you. If you feel a bit useless or worthless or a burden to the family, you say 'screw it' and then try to pick up the vacuum to help clean the house or do other things that can help others. Even coming here to help out some struggling new sufferers will defuse the thought of being useless or worthless. You are doing something positive for yourself and for others. You can still see, walk, talk, hear, think, enjoy some moments of fun with things, etc., etc.. Give yourself a pad on the back and say I am ok and things will get better.
       
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