I Have Tinnitus and I'm Scared of the Upcoming ENT Appointment

Discussion in 'Introduce Yourself' started by Pigeon, May 6, 2016.

    1. Pigeon
      Tired

      Pigeon Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      unknown
      Hello, I am a 21 year old female recently plagued by tinnitus. I've had this since the second to the last week of April 2016 and I feel scared, depressed, and light-headed. I'm not sure what caused it...

      It was after my wisdom teeth extraction maybe a week or two weeks after that I started hearing this sound. Before this, I played my music near the ear damaging level even sometimes on it as a way to mask my parents demeaning comments. It's stupid of me to have done it, and I feel so dumb for doing something so ignorant and foolish. Also, I played the keyboard at full volume without protection and was in full blast range of my sister's french horn. I'm stressed out about this and my family who kept teasing me and brushing it off. The only people who cared were my sister and brother, whom I have a close relationship with.

      I have whistling in my left ear that sometimes becomes buzzing or low whistling, and a high pitched static/whistling in my right ear. The whistling doesn't bother me at night, where all I hear is silence or static which lulls me to sleep. Sometimes, I have muddled hearing for certain frequencies so I think I have hearing loss. Stress and bad sleep elevates the ringing and some days when I get enough rest I can almost taste silence. Recently, I visited my family doctor to explain the condition and hearing "permanent" and "no-cure" really scares me. He prescribed me anti-histamines, thinking that it could be a problem with allergies or sinuses. He told me to report back to him in two weeks if I still hear the ringing or whistling. To make matters worse, my father scheduled me to an ENT next Wednesday. Yeah, it's a great thing. The doctor will hopefully tell me what my problem is or give me insight to my condition. But, my father was using it as a way to show how caring and amazing of a father he is./sarcasm He also reminded me that it might be a more serious condition after my talk with my mother who brought up the words "cancer," "melanoma," and "dad's family genetic diseases." Of course, I did the responsible and mature thing where I cussed at him. Now, in his all merciful nature, he is threatening to cancel the appointment./sarcasm I'll probably apologize, because it was partially all the stress that built up that made me explode at him like that.

      The thing about my mother is that she's a fear monger. She wretches the fear hidden in your heart and shoves it into your throat so you can choke on it. She also kept me from seeing a doctor for so long because she thought it was from a collection of ear wax. She's not a doctor nor is she in the medical profession. I would describe her as the pinnacle amateur medicinal enthusiast. She works as a technician for the state's agricultural department for Pete's sake. By her advice, I put ear drops into my right ear. As I did so, I felt dizzy and almost fell on my sister as I was walking toward the living room. I asked my medical student brother about it and he says that the ear is sensitive to temperature changes so that could be it.

      A couple of days later, my ears started itching and hurting like periodically in the day. There was pressure on the forehead in the middle of my eyes, underneath the bump on the bridge of my nose, and on the lower sides by my nostrils. I started sneezing, felt pressure on my face, and experienced tension on top of my head. I caught myself one time with a runny nose that only dripped once. Since then, I've had a dry nose and mouth (as is normal) since my room switches between extreme climates (depending whether the heater is on). I clench my teeth when I'm awake many times so I'm not sure if that affected my tinnitus or not. Another thing, is that I had trouble finding where I'm supposed to bite with my inner teeth at the dentist after the procedure. A few days ago, I was eating and it sort of tickled and hurt in my left ear when I bite down into food or clenched my teeth. It disappeared a few days later so I thought nothing of it.

      I learned to fear brushing my teeth. Each time I cleaned the holes where my wisdom teeth had been, the tinnitus became more apparent. I'm not sure if I dislocated my jaw at one point or another. Every noise became more apparent because of this. Whether it was the water rushing in the aquarium, showering, heater, airplanes, and the flushing of the toilet, the consistent sound of whistling/buzzing persevered. Occasionally, I lie down with my glasses on and it hurts a few hours later. Other times, when I wake up I hear the sounds and I switch my sleeping position from the other ear. There are times I wake up with no noise and I count those as miracles.

      I fell in a really dark place yesterday, but thankfully my talk with my sister got me out of it. I was terrified that I had acoustic neuroma, brain cancer, or some type of tumor in my brain. I read some stories on here where people needed MRI's and it's been a fear of mine that the MRI's will find something or make the tinnitus worse. Death is something I'm truly afraid of. Living is also something I'm fearful of. I'm frightened of the cost of this to my parents and the backlash that will come out of it. What if it is serious? What if it's cancer or tumor(s) or acoustic neuroma?
      How am I going to pay for it? Will insurance cover this?
      I don't want to leave my sister or my brother. I want to be there for them like my grandma is here for all three of us.

      I want to live.

      I'm afraid of wanting to live.

      I rather have hearing loss that a tumor or cancer. What if I become deaf? I don't want to lose music and sounds for the rest of my life.

      I don't want to leave them alone.

      I don't want to die alone.

      It's super rare, but I'm so, so scared. So scared, in fact, that I'm so stressed I can barely eat.

      My sister comforted me by saying that no matter what she'll be there and we'll cross this hurdle together with my brother and grandma and all the people I care about. She will start a fundraiser and gather her friends and school mom (her favorite teacher who she considers as a mother) to help pay for the costs. Because people, humanity, may have their darkest flaws, but in times of adversity people show the kindness and strength that everyone has the potential for.

      I cried so much that day, not to the extent when my dog died or when my grandpa did, but enough that I got dehydration the next day (with the anti-histamines). I'm so happy I have such amazing siblings that even in times of fear (when they can easily cast me aside or brush off my worries), they stick by me and comfort me (in their own way). If I get through this and hopefully it's nothing horrible or serious, I'll dedicate my life to making the world a better place. I may not be in the medical profession, but I'm an engineering major. If there is anything that anyone can take from this field, it is that engineers solve problems.

      Tinnitus is my problem, and I will solve it.
       
    2. glynis
      Feminine

      glynis Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      2004
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Meniere's Disease
      Welcome to Tinnitus Talk pigeon.
      Having wisdom teeth out can cause a temporary problem with your jaw.
      The presure on the jaw joint from extraction can cause inflammation to the jaw joint as well as opening your jaw wide for the extraction .
      Your bite would have changed and needs to settle dowm.
      Your jaw joint is right by your middle ear so easy to cause tinnitus till it settles down.
      I carnt say you have damaged your ears from loud sound but ENT will do a hearing test and maybe a routine MRI referral ......
      Try stay calm as stress will make the tinnitus sound louder so relax and stay calm.
      We are here round the clock to support you.
      Keep posting on the main forum for support....lots of love glynis
       
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    3. Cillian

      Cillian Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/16
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Sinus infection
      @Pigeon try and stay around noise and mask it as best as you can

      When I first got it i just lied in bed and it nearly drove me to insanity I'm suffering from severe TMJ although my T isn't too bad so I would go for an X Ray and see a TMJ specialist

      Hope this helps :)
       
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    4. Iwan K

      Iwan K Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      15 March
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      anxiety ?
      I just read your heartbreaking opening text and it got me crying. I am 25 year old male (from Germany) and I can perfectly well understand what it is for a young person to face all this, at such an young age, when we are just about to enter life. The tragedy of the human life is not that it is so short, it is the fact that we wait so long until we are fully ready to embrace it.

      You have written in an absolutely impeccable English, a quality that is rare even for a native speaker. That means that you are really smart, educated and ambitious. You will be an engineer , your future is ahead of you. I myself always went to the best schools, had the best grades, I am very motivated and determined to succeed and this thing hit me. I am set to start my dream internship in two weeks but I dont feel like it. I know that I have to move on and find myself. I divide my life into two parts - before and after March 7th when it all started. But in reality I know that I should not disregard everything I had before that. I know that I need to move on with my life because I know that it is a matter of time until the big pharmacies are able to help us. Scientists are soon gonna be able to transfer our brains into other bodies, I am sure they will be able to fix some ringing in the ear. We got to believe, we got to persevere !
       
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    5. billie48
      Sunshine

      billie48 Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2009
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      not sure
      Welcome to the forum. I feel for you deep suffering. Yes, tinnitus may be your problem now but it may be just a temporary problem. I was in the same shoe a few years back with my ultra high pitch dog whistle T and severe hyperacusis which turned all normal sounds unbearable loud and piercingly hurtful. But today I live a normal, productive and absolutely enjoyable life. I wrote my success story mentioning the important points and strategies which have helped me turn around the suffering. For brevity of the detail, here is the link to my story if you are interested to find out these strategies:

      https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/from-darkness-to-light-how-i-recovered-from-tinnitus-hyperacusis.3148/

      So don't panic and despair and don't try to project a catastrophic future based on the worst initial suffering. I know it is easier said than done at this trying time and that being fearful of the unknown is understandable when T is new. We have all been there at one time, suffering mightily. But I know that such reaction will only cause elevated stress and anxiety which are known to fire up tinnitus. I have learned to convert to positivity and the rest is history. I thought initially that my future life would be all dark, lonely and deeply suffering, but heck, the opposite of all that has happened. Don't listen to the lies of the T bully suggesting all sorts of distorted thoughts to your mind, which is controlled by the limbic nerves right now due to the T trauma. You are functioning on fight or flight mode which tends to amply the T sensation. I encourage you to read the success stories and learn how others get better. You can get better and get through this. Believe it. Give it time. Learn some strategies and apply them. Take good care & God bless.
       
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    6. Cillian

      Cillian Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/16
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Sinus infection
      Mine started 3 days before you. How did you get T and how bad is it ? :)
       
    7. Iwan K

      Iwan K Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      15 March
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      anxiety ?
      To be honest its not that bad. During the day I hardly notice it, then for some reason when I go to bed it starts becoming significantly more pronounced and last night for the first time I had trouble falling to sleep. My doctor found fungual infection in both ears but more in the left one, which rings more, so I am hoping that after the steroid tratement it will go away.. what about you ?
       
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    8. Cillian

      Cillian Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/16
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Sinus infection
      I thought it was sinuses but unfortunately it's TMJ had a full exam and an X Ray and my jaw is inflamed and a bit out of sync the pain is horrendous and all the other symptoms like facial tiredness and neck pain it's absolutely horrible:(
       
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    9. Iwan K

      Iwan K Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      15 March
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      anxiety ?
      but at least they found an underlying condition, which could be treated and T might disappear.. I can only imagine how frustrating it is for people to hear the noise and to have 0 clue what causes it..
       
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    10. Cillian

      Cillian Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/16
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Sinus infection
      Ya I hope so fingers crossed haha
       
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    11. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Pigeon
      Tired

      Pigeon Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      unknown
      Thank you guys so much for the replies, advice, and support. This is a terrible thing we all have and we are all very strong people for dealing with it. Thank you so much for your stories and reading my post. This whole community is so warm and welcoming in spite of sharing the same aggravating condition (though different for each person). From the topics of doctor's to treatments and possible cures to even people speaking about their worries, everyone here illustrates the good in humanity.

      You've given me faith in being human, in being alive, and in hope.
      Thank you.

      I'll probably update you on my doctor's diagnoses, MRI (if I need to take one), and a possible hearing exam. Thank you for your feedback and care! Good night!
       
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    12. fishbone
      Shitfaced

      fishbone Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      1988
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      loud noise and very bad sickness

      There is nothing to be worried about. tinnitus usually happens due to loud noise exposure or an infection/illness. Don't scare yourself like this. You are young and that is very important to understand. Now if you were much older and this just came out of nowhere, then maybe you could worry. Go to the ENT and see what they say, tinnitus is not the end of the world. It is annoying...YES but it is not the end of the world. This forum and myself will support you all the way :)
       
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    13. Cillian

      Cillian Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/16
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Sinus infection
      @Pigeon medicine and the whole medical world in general is advancing every year even if it doesn't feel like that.

      It's only a matter of time before treatment is found so it's about how we manage it until that great day comes around :)
       
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