My Success Story 2.0

Hi all,

I already posted a succes story but time went on and I'm in a much better place since my first succes story.

The reason for writing this second one is also due to the fact that I have learned something about T and H which I want to share.

At the moment that my H started I was doing too much on the same time and forgot to relax. Next too that is was saying yes to everyone.. Even if I disagreed... my self-esteem was slowly fading without me recognizing it.

Out of the blue H started. I first blamed my new (smaller) car. Than T came around.. still blaming my car.. in a later stage blamed the loud parties I attended.

A few people mentioned stress as the culprit. I did agree with them because my hearing tests where just fine. So I knew that I had to do something on my stress levels. So went to a psych too handle the T and to lower my stress levels.

I understood all the things the fine guy told me, and made progress but something dark was there in the background.. The dark thing was slowing down my progress and I really didn't understand what was going on.. I believed all the success stories, I knew it was just a matter of time that I became used to T. Was able to listen to my T without anxiety... But still that dark feeling became so immense that I was on the verge of killing myself.. Not because of the T but because of the dark feeling..

So my psych advised me to start with an AD. I started with Venlafaxine which made the dark feeling so intense that I wasn't able to handle it (yes I know that thing become worse before they get better with AD ).

After ending up in a psych ward I was prescribed mirtazapine and clomipramine (mirt was already prescribed by my GP to improve my sleeping issues).

After aprox two weeks I started to feeling better; T became not so intrusive anymore and H disappeared. The dark feeling went away most of the time and my thoughts became positive.

In the end I was diagnosed with general anxiety disorder with also some signs of OCD which resulted in a depression. During my stay on the psych ward one of the psychiatrist told me that she had seen a lot of people with anxiety disorders that are also where complaining about T. So there might be a link between mental disorders and T.

I didn't really believed in such a link, and was sure that the H en T triggered my general anxiety and disorder/depression. Until I started to read a book by a Dutch comedian "Mike Bodde". He was depressed for more that 7 years and I recognized a lot of the things he described. Especially the part regarding about the overreaction of your senses. Visual senses and audition!! senses where much stronger.. He literary wrote down what I was experiencing before I started with an AD.

Because everything was really louder, even the shower! But it wasn't hurting my ears, so it was not H but just a symptom of my depression...

Thinking back of my pre depression time I already had minor T and didn't give shit about it, I even think that I still have the same T but my depression made it a issue..

So if your checks by a ENT results in nothing, and you are feeling really bad.. Also talk to a psych. Because I guess if your T is a symptom of a mental disorder than therapies such as TRT won't help you that much because you won't work on the actual problem.

 

Happy to hear you are doing so much better!

I will try and get my hands on the book by Mike Bodde, thanks for pointing it out. I suffered from burn out a couple of years ago (perhaps I still do..) and I remember having to wear sunglasses every time i left the house...

 

@MatthijsDJ hi and thank you for the story
I have an anxiety disorder. I am scared of everything. Sunlight, people, being in public. but I am also sure that my T is noise induced. I have been thinking all the time to take Antidepressants, because my anxiety is disabling me. Which Antidepressants do you recommend? i dont care so much if they help my T but just my anxiety concerning T.
That would be great. Bc maybe the anxiety is worsening my T.
I would really appreciate an answer

 

@Zora well I'm on 30 mg mirtazapine for sleep and also to boost my main ad which is Clomipramine.

Brand names for both:
Remeron for mirtazapine
Anafranil for clomipramine

For short term relieve you can use lorazepam or lormetazepam. Both being benzos hence addictive so don't use them for more than two weeks. I had some nasty days comming off them after three months.

But above is my experience so my best advise will be to talk to a psychiatrist.

 

Thanks for your story, @MatthijsDJ. Research suggests that for some people, there is a link between mood disorders (anxiety, depression) and tinnitus, particularly chronic and debilitating tinnitus. But no one is sure exactly what the link is, if it works in conjunction with another stresser like noise exposure, etc.

I would agree that if you have severe tinnitus coupled with extreme anxiety and/or depression, short-term medication under the care of a psychiatrist can be helpful. I also benefited greatly from cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), which is done by a therapist vs a psychiatrist. Glad you are doing better.

Oh, and @Zora:
What type of medication might work best for you is a question best answered by a psychiatrist, not someone on an Internet board, although it can be helpful to hear about other people's experiences with a drug. But reaction to these meds varies hugely from person to person. It often even takes a doctor a few tries to get it right, which is why its best to be in the care of a mental health professional.

 

I think you raise an important point here, my T was very stable and not altered by stress at all, up to a period of extreme anxiety, medically induced I might add.
It then came back ten times worse with H, and was made worse even by me speaking at one point.
I had no noise trauma at all.
I am improved now after 7 months of my own therapy but no way back to my normal, by increasing SSRI's, practising relaxing, walks, lots of supplements, fruits , nuts and seeds. I can see clearly that mine is controlled by stress however small the stressor. I am in menopause a time known for being suseptable to stress so I suspect I
have along road ahead.
Can you tell me the title of the book you mentioned and is it written in Dutch or English?

 

I personally have sertraline (zoloft). It does make anxiety worse for a few weeks but then it settles and for me general anxiety is gone.

 

@LadyDi I asked my psychiatrist about the link. Because if it was really linked to my mental disorder than maybe it was something that doctor was able to fix. She told me that indeed there isn't a known link, but that she just noticed as something that a lot of her patients where complaining about (pre med state, so not med induced T!). She was a intern but it was already a common thing that she noticed in the patients that she was taking care off.

@noisebox The book is called "Pil" (pill) and as far as I know there isn't an English translation available. One of the reasons that he wrote the book is due to the bad press that AD medication is getting. It helped me at least to make the decision to start with AD and accepting that it might be a lifelong thing.

 

So year forward and made major steps. Accepted my T so far that it's time to say goodbye too my AD medication. From tomorrow on I will lower the dosage step by step until I'm off it. Moments like the one in the picture will provide me with the power to make it