Noise-Induced Tinnitus Changing Tones Unexplainedly a Month After Traumatic Noise Event

Hello, I've been lurking for about a week on the Success Stories and decided I'd ask for some advice.

I gave myself tinnitus by grinding metal without PPE on after years of doing so properly.
As you can imagine, I am now so full of regret and sadness.

I originally had one tone inside my head and one in my right ear that would oscillate when I would close the canal with my finger.

It's been about a month with no further exposure to loud noise for periods longer than a moment or so, i.e.: dishes clattering or a child yelling.

Since then I believe my tones have changed. I now hear a faint one in my left ear when I had originally heard it only when I closed my left ear with my finger, but now when it's quiet I can hear it. I still have a tone inside my head, and now the right ear has a new tone that is constant in addition to the tone that is heard when I close my ear with my finger.

I was given Trazodone for sleeping which I took 100~mg of for about a week but still had very intermittent sleep. I read it was ototoxic so I stopped, I was also given Wellbutrin which I read the same so never took.

I had used my Bose noise cancelling earbuds at work as the ambient noise can be 70 dB. I stopped that after seeing lots of people claiming it did more harm than good, and that headphones are bad. I spoke to an ENT who has had tinnitus for 20 years and he told me that my DPAOE test showed no signs of permanent damage and that headphones at low volume shouldn't worsen things.

When I shift my jaw as forward as possible I do hear a slight change in my tinnitus in my head, also I'm scared of yawning (which is all the time as 4hrs intermittent is my sleep schedule) as I hear EVERYTHING so much louder and it's just a screaming reminder of my failure.

Do you think the changing tones are a sign of recovery or worsening? I'm 25 for reference. I'm really struggling, I've been so careful my entire life and I feel like I ruined the rest of it over not putting in earplugs.

I feel like I died that day and now I'm just a husk of what I was. I've seen so much suffering on tinnitus forums and I know how bad this is. I just wish I knew the severity of the consequences beforehand... I damaged my ears about a week before Halloween.

Sorry for format I'm on my phone.
I miss smoking weed

I've seen lots of people saying in 3-24 months it can get better or even resolve. I'm really praying this is the case for me, or that it even lessens until a drug comes out that can potentially cure me. Who knows, all I know is that I'm in the real fucking suck right now.

 

Please don't swear. "Fucking suck" is not nice language...

It can get better like you've heard. How are you feeling today?