The Sloane Ranger

People with tinnitus need support - all of them.
There is no question about that - it is not nice.

I would like to raise an issue that bothers me, and others like me.
The disparity in the severity of the tinnitus experience is incredibly wide.
My own tinnitus was super mild for 22 years - but then, following a hateful onslaught of noise created by a ‘friend,’ all hell broke loose.
I was living in the worst kind of hell that anybody, let alone a successful professional musician, could imagine.
Yes - I wanted to die.
I prayed that I would die that very night.
I even worked out the only way I could do it.

Being married to the most beautiful angel that this life has ever produced, I hung on, with her help, and looked for ways to cope - if that were even a possibility.

I re-invented my previous method of meditation, now geared towards my new predicament, and found a way to make it work for me.

Now the point I would dearly love to make here is this.
It is lovely to have achieved some degree of success with this ‘ogre’ sitting just above our shoulder, and then to share it, with the hope of perhaps helping others.
I do this myself with regard to healing Bruxism, recommending ways to relax, and ways to approach meditation.

However, there is one aspect to this which can be very frustrating and annoying.

The “I did it - and you can do it too,” statement with which we are constantly bombarded is an insult to the intelligence of those severe sufferers who are coming to terms with something very much more severe.
Reading such words is akin to sticking a bayonet in their ear and twisting it for good effect.

“I did it this way” is fine - no argument.

“And you can too,” is an affront which I will never accept.

Your tinnitus, my well-meaning friend
IS NOT MY TINNITUS.

I always confront such puerile comments, and am coming to think of myself as
‘The Sloane Ranger.” (I live in London.)

(By the way, I’ve no idea who this oddball to my right is......)

 

@Markku - my friend - thank you.

 

@Jazzer

Great post,

I see exactly what you mean. Whilst I will always remain positive, I will ensure that I think before I speak.

The only tinnitus I know is my own and I have no idea how bad others have it.

I hope we can all find some peace in life, good luck to us all.

Thank you for the wise words.

Simon

 

Thank you Simon.
You know - I really value this web site, it is an invaluable resource for sufferers to be able to meet here.

Over the past few years I have continually noticed that the biggest cause of friction is quite simply that the failure of members to appreciate the disparity in severity of this ‘thing’ can cause much frustration, stress and even insult.

It is a great shame when friends on here fall out purely because these differences are not appreciated or respected.

Yes - we are all affected by tinnitus, but we must respect that there are very real differences.

Best wishes to everybody,
Dave x
Jazzer

 

This is true, Dave.

 

For as long as I can remember I had faint "crickets" in my ears during the quietest of time at night just before going to sleep. I figured everyone did. So I suppose I had T most of my life. I started shooting in the 60's without hearing protection when I was probably eight. So by definition, I had T.

Then I had this explosion of gunfire out of nowhere in about 2008. Then that is when the volume went up very high, and stayed. That is when life changed as I knew it.

So that is in line with the "disparity" mentioned in the OP. There are way way more people in the world with very low T volume, and don't care. Then there are those of us with a very high, life altering, volume of T.

I don't really personally know anyone else with real bad T. Only on this forum and a gun forum have I learned that there are others that have it bad. I probably offended some on here with my "just deal with it and get on with life" comments and certainly meant no harm.

 

Great post thanks for sharing. What I find worse are those that say "no cure" and shout it from the rafters. Got into it with an admin on one of the facebook groups. Claims that the only cause is damaged hair cells, despite the fact that I gave her medical papers indicating it is not the only cause. Finally had enough, got into it with her, left the group and blocked her butt. You would think that an Admin in a group that is aimed at helping users would not have an attitude like that, and at the very minimum would be educated on the subject.