What Is Life Worth without Hearing Normally?

Discussion in 'Support' started by jdjd09, May 20, 2016.

tinnitus forum
    1. jdjd09

      jdjd09 Member

      So, first off, I don't ask this question to make judgement on anyone with hearing loss. I ask this as I really don't know.

      I lost some hearing in one ear and I'm 28 years old. I feel I wont be able to enjoy music ss much anymore. I have more trouble hearing conversations and can't even hear conversations in other rooms anymore.

      What is life worth without normal hearing? Socializing, emjoying music and movies, and many other experiences require hearing. I may not be able to enjoy the new tech coming out either. For example, they will have headphones that translate other languages live soon. Probably out this year. Overall, this sucks and see the point as I feel I'm missing out on life now.

      What is the point of living with hearing loss measureable on an audiogram ?

      Thanks for any information.
       
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    2. Path Maker

      Path Maker Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic
      Only you can find out for yourself. Only you can walk the path of your own life. Continue to compare yourself to others and you will never find out for yourself. You are asking the wrong questions about how to live despite the audiograms, etc. You need to ask yourself what matters IN ADDITION to the things you may no longer be able to do, and then honor them. If your ship loses a sail, but still has other sails left, then you're still on the ocean and can still have adventures. Only ... YOU ... can make this happen for yourself. Peace.
       
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    3. Path Maker

      Path Maker Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic
      Sorry for the tough love, but, ya know what? It's time to look for the good.
       
    4. linearb
      Psychedelic

      linearb Member Hall of Fame

      Location:
      East Coast USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      1998
      Lots of people have abnormal hearing and are fine.

      If I could completely give up all perceptions of sound over 5khz including my tinnitus, I'd do it in a heartbeat. Hell, if I could do that and still have tinnitus that wasn't physically painful, I very well might.
       
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    5. JasonP

      JasonP Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      6/2006
      Can you post your audiogram? You can block all your name and information like that.
       
    6. Andunwoody
      Fine

      Andunwoody Member

      Location:
      South Buckinghamshire, England.
      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2009
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Left ear Otosclerosis, right ear virus.
      I have severe hearing loss in my left ear. In the past 14 months I have had two Ménière's type attacks, each lasting around eight weeks (temporary complete hearing loss, vertigo, H and extremely loud T) this has now caused very slight hearing loss in my right earns well. I now have constant T in both ears but I have pretty much habituated in the sense that all though I can always hear the T it seldom distresses me. I live in a small town just outside London but I am currently in NJ staying with family. I flew over last week with zero affect to my T. I have been to NYC, the Jersey shore and have enjoyed time here in Madison with my family, taking my granddaughter to school and the park, playing blowing bubbles and generally having fun. Today we are going to Hoboken, tomorrow we are taking a trip to Philidelphia. Since my hearing loss in 2008 I have flown to the U.S. and back 15 times, I have also flown to Canada and Barbados, to mainland Europe and Scandinavia two or three times every year and taken several domestic flights within the U.S. I have relocated twice for my husbands job, six months in Atlanta Ga. and six months in the north of England.
      In social situations I do have difficulty hearing sometimes, friends and family know this and make allowances. In shops, restaurants etc if I can't hear the assistant or server I have no embarassment in say "I'm sorry, I'm deaf can you repeat that" if I can't hear. Although I'm not a great music fan I have a Sonos system at home and have music playing at low volume for much of the day, I prefer this to white noise as a distraction for my T. Sometimes my hearing can be very distorted in which case I give up on the music and hope for better things tomorrow........guess what tomorrow is invariably a better day. I have been to a music festival (including sleeping in a tent for three nights....) my husband is a huge Melissa Etheridge fan so I have been two open air concerts of hers here in the U.S. ....... no clubbing as I'm don't fit the demographic any more, no other reason. We go to live theatre and cinema as well. I have a good social life, visit lots of noisy coffee bars and restaurants and I try to look after myself and exercise by walking about five miles a day (I hate the gym).

      Hearing loss sucks, it's pretty much ruined my life.........ha ha obviously I'm joking!!

      @jdjd09 you've had heaps of support and sympathy on this forum but now I think it's time for you to 'man up' as we say in England. Life is for living, stop moaning and looking for answers and solutions that aren't there.........get on with your life.
       
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    7. bill 112
      Studious

      bill 112 Member

      Location:
      Republic Of Ireland
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2012
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise exposure
      Hearing loss isn't a life ruiner T and H on the other hand are.If I was given the choice,hearing loss or T and H what do you think I'd pick?Exactly either way what I say is dwarfed by what Path Maker said,pretty much hit the nail on the head;)
       
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    8. Sailboardman
      Frustrated

      Sailboardman Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Florida
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/21/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Sensorineural hearing loss right ear.
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    9. RAY
      Lurking

      RAY Member

      Location:
      England
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2000
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Virus in left ear
      jdjd09
      Stop moaning and grow up
       
    10. ceauses97
      Speechless

      ceauses97 Member

      Location:
      Norway
      Tinnitus Since:
      06/12/15
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      loud music/chemotherapy/hypercalcemia
      Support forum bro, be a little more supportive.
       
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    11. awbw8
      Balanced

      awbw8 Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2013
      Hey,

      Try not to take the tough love the wrong way - people all care about you here, but it can be frustrating to not be able to help someone you want to help. You need to go seek out a therapist or professional to talk about your feelings. Being depressed with T and hearing loss etc.'s onset is totally normal, but it's more than likely more than a support forum can help you with. Depression is a physical ailment that needs treatment when it's bad.

      Path Maker said it well, only you know what makes life worth living to you. Life is HUGE and full of amazing things, but it's near impossible to see that when you're in a bad mental place.

      Do keep in mind that even when you find a therapist, you have to do the work, too along with their thoughts and guidance. You have to decide you want help and that you want to live and enjoy life again and be open to the idea that while life going forward may be a bit different, it can still be great if not better.

      Work with what you have and take a step forward. Instead of focusing on what sucks, write a list of all the things you're grateful for. No one can give you happiness - it's in you and you have to build and find it within yourself. If you're dead set of believing that life can never be good again unless it is what it was pre-T/hearing loss etc., then no one can change your mind. It is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

      Hang in there and I hope you decide to start the journey to something better, even if it seems like that's an impossible goal, you just need to take a step at a time, make little changes, and I think you'll be surprised what you'll find in time.
       
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    12. volsung37

      volsung37 Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      2014
      None of us knows what tomorrow will bring. We try to guess and a lot of the time w e're wrong. Life has its own way of working out no matter what our overactive minds think. Just take one day at a time and you may find you enjoy life anyway despite your forebodings.
       
    13. Michael2013
      Happy

      Michael2013 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      September 2013
      Exactly! It's the story of the wolf you feed.

      An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy.

      “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.” He continued, “The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”

      The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”
      The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”​


      For me? I love my life. Of course I have bad days and I have good days. But in general, I'm happy. And I absolutely will not let my hearing loss prevent me from enjoying life. That's my choice. There are so many things out there you can do and enjoy that you'll never get to experience them all. Life is too short for that. So you can choose to dwell on the negative and the things you can't do, or you can find things you can do and enjoy that. Either way, your "life worth" is up to you.
       
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    14. RB2014
      Confused

      RB2014 Member Benefactor

      Location:
      US
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2014 became noticable
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loss of hearing and then stress and anxiety
      I have to respectfully disagree on this one. Hearing loss sucks big time. Try having a conversation with someone if you can only figure out half the words they are saying, or relying on lip reading most of the time just to figure out what people are saying. Its pretty draining at the end of the day. Hearing aides are also not fun. Don't put your head down for a nap or you will start whistling.

      The fun part is when you have severe hearing loss, you pretty much get T and H as a side bonus, so you really don't get to pick one or the other.

      I will throw a disclaimer that I cannot imagine having H with perfect hearing. Even with moderate/profound hearing loss H was pretty unbearable. I can only imagine how much louder and painful it would be with perfect hearing.

      Jd, from what you have posted you have very minimal hearing loss. You really arent missing out on anything. If you don't like the way music sounds, turn up the trebble a bit and you are good to go. Same for the new tech you are talking about. Right now you can easily compensate for your loss.
       
    15. bill 112
      Studious

      bill 112 Member

      Location:
      Republic Of Ireland
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2012
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise exposure
      Do you have H?Just curious.
       
    16. Telis

      Telis Member Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Calgary
      Tinnitus Since:
      11/2013
      I have trouble believing this with only slight loss in one ear.
       
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    17. Cristian Ro

      Cristian Ro Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2009
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    18. luka

      luka Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      8/2014
      This is my audiogram, and I don't need hearing aid and hear just fine in most of the occasions.

      luka-audiogram.jpg
       
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    19. bill 112
      Studious

      bill 112 Member

      Location:
      Republic Of Ireland
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2012
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise exposure
      Being tired from trying to hear people all day is much better than being in horrendous pain from being able to hear them clearly believe me.Many people get hearing loss and carry on with life but when you get H your basically disabled with excruciating consequences.Which would I pick?Pretty sure the answers obvious isn't it?But I'm not arguing with you and I respect what you said it's just if you have severe H you'll understand how mundane normal hearing loss appears to us.Not that it isn't a horrible thing in itself but trust me on this,severe H is so much worse![/QUOTE]
       
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    20. glynis-harbron
      Feminine

      glynis-harbron Member Benefactor Hall of Fame Ambassador Team Awareness Team Research

      Location:
      England, Stoke-on-Trent
      Tinnitus Since:
      2004
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Meniere's Disease
      I need hearing aids and they do help with tinnitus and loss of hearing.
      Push to stay positive and don't let it rule your life.....stay strong...lots of love glynis
       
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    21. RB2014
      Confused

      RB2014 Member Benefactor

      Location:
      US
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2014 became noticable
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loss of hearing and then stress and anxiety
      I did have H for a while, but I got it due to anxiety and when the anxiety went away so did the H. Yeah, I can't imagine having good hearing and H. It was painful for me having H with my bad hearing. The problem is that hearing loss by itself isnt bad, its what comes with it. T can get pretty loud and harder to manage. Once you lose more than 80db on the higher frequencies word recognition goes down the toilet. I honestly wouldn't want either, but I guess we don't get to pick.
       
    22. jdjd09

      jdjd09 Member

      @Path Maker , I really mainly ask because with a boat it's good to see what boats did too in there journey to wherever they went. Also I'm finding difficult to continue on my journey I guess as well.
       
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    23. jdjd09

      jdjd09 Member

      So I'll be honest, therapist have never really helped me in my life. I've seen them before this issue and one after this issue. They don't really do too much for me. However, I feel like someone going through what I'm going through and knowing the way out helps me. That kind of person would help me.

      I'm sure, like you are saying, attitude plays a role in all this. Just a question of how to make this life ok.
       
    24. Zug

      Zug Member Benefactor

      Both of those guys have Tinnitus. Life is not perfect, but you can still find your way. ;)

       
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    25. Rina
      Energetic

      Rina Member

      Location:
      florida, USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/18/2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Really don't know
      Good video @Zug
       
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    26. Vaba
      Shitfaced

      Vaba Member

      Location:
      New New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      Unknown
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown. Gradual, Progressive
      They're far, far older than us though :(
       
    27. jdjd09

      jdjd09 Member

      @Michael2013 , thanks for your reply. May I ask are you able to enjoy music or do you listen to music ever with your hearing loss? Also, do you really believe that I will ever get there?

      I talk to a girl a lot on phone, for example. I have to say what many times with her. I guess, I just ask, how were you able to converse, date, etc. in your 20s without hearing aids (or did you date a lot without the hearing aids)? Sorry if this question is personal, I just ask and would just like to know (with an honest answer of course) how it was? Maybe it is just her voice, I don't know. But, it's something I noticed.
       
    28. jdjd09

      jdjd09 Member

      @luka , can I ask how old you are and how you are able to hear conversations around you with no issue with that level of hearing loss? Do you have any times that you do have issues hearing, do you take anything to protect your hearing further? Not that I doubt you, I'm just really curious.
       
    29. RB2014
      Confused

      RB2014 Member Benefactor

      Location:
      US
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2014 became noticable
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loss of hearing and then stress and anxiety
      Every person talks at different frequencies. Some girls talk higher pitched than others. Some will be easier to understand than others. If you are saying what on the phone too many times she might be hitting the frequency that you have a loss in. With high frequency loss you can still hear, but making out the words may be difficult. A lot of times words will sound the same and you have to pick the one that makes sense. You may need to find another girl to talk to if you are doing it too much. Maybe she is slurring a lot, or maybe there is background noise when she is talking. Any of these things could make it harder for you to understand.

      Didn't you say you only have hearing loss in one ear? then why not switch to the other ear?
       
    30. Ricardo1991
      Fine

      Ricardo1991 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Signs seem to point to head/ neck injury!
      Well, honestly. It's up to you; I have my husband to live for. I have my family to live for. I have my friends to live for. I have recipes I need to cook. I have things I need to try. There's places I need to see. All in time.

      Honestly, I have had those feelings too, don't get me wrong. I have hearing loss and have T. Just think of stuff that will keep you moving. Of course we're going to tell you to keep going. We have.
      Much love,
      Ricardo
       

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