Am I Making Things Worse? (Kiss on the Cheek Spiked Tinnitus & Generally, Just Going Out...)

Hey guys it's been quite awhile since I regularly posted here but for anyone whose not familiar with my background I've been suffering with T and H since January 2014.

The last few years were a roller coaster of emotions and sacrifices,I worked so hard at making my H better that I went from the edge of suicide to feeling nearly 80% percent recovered by August 2015.It was a lonely long hard road I dragged myself up through to get me to that point and believe me it wasn't easy.

But now I've been met with a new obstacle that's taking me way out of my comfort zone,I've met someone that I love with all my heart and with that comes a whole new set of challenges and I'm suffering for it.

Since I've met her I've began pushing myself harder and harder with my ears that is.I've been in busy restaurants earplugs free,I've been out and about busy towns earplugs free,I've had friends up for a few social drinks sometimes quite loud without earplugs.

I try my best not to rely on earplugs as best I can as I truly believe if I wear them for everyday situations I'll never stop!Its not that I don't wear them,if we're going somewhere noisy I'll have them worn at all times whether it be her cousins birthday or going to see comedy shows together,it's the unpredictable sounds that usually catch me out.

The best thing is she understands my condition and is very considerate towards me when it comes to noise it's just that I'm exposing myself to much louder sounds and environments than what I'm used to or comfortable with.I was doing ok with it until recently when she gave me a kiss on my cheek right beside my ear and the sound stabbed my ear like a knife!Needless to say the T and H have been extremely aggravated ever since.

My question is should I be getting out more like I am?Or am I just takeing huge risks and being stupid? I love this woman and I want to lead a life with her rather than just hiding away from the world like I did.My T and H are quite bad at the moment and I just don't know what to do and could have the kiss noise caused any kind of lasting damage?

Its just that the T and H has been up and down ever since and I don't know if it's just me stressing about life change I've made or that I'm genuinely making things worseAny opinions are greatly appreciated.Cheers.Bill.

 

Hello Bill,

It is good to hear you decided to not let tinnitus lead your life, and as we know tinnitus can be temporary aggravated by alot of things, but that does not mean we should stop living our lives the way we like it.

It is impossible for a kiss to do permanent damage, it simply is not loud enough, although it can sound very uncomfortable when you have hyperacusis, the same goes for city sounds, just try to enjoy your new found life with the girl you love and I am sure your tinnitus will settle back down again in awhile.

Just yesterday I was in a coffee bar and the firl behind the counter put on the coffee grinder, that sounded incredibly loud and uncomfortable but she did not even flinch, she did look weird that I was standing there with my fingers in my ears though lol, that's life and our ears can handle those situations just fine, we should give them more credit.

I just came out of recent bad spike so I know how frustrating and annoying it can be but you will be fine mate.

Take care.

 

Hi Bill,
Aww it's lovely to hear you have a new love in your life and been getting out and about.
Just be sensible with ear protection and if your ears are finding things tough just explaine how you feel about her and your worried how your ears are coping at the moment and need keep your ear reduction plugs with you.
I don't think the lovely kiss by your ear would cause any problem maybe just the anxiety with how you feel .
I'm sure you and your new partner will be fine and supportive too and shower you in kisses even if needs to gives your ears a miss ......lots of love glynis

 

@bill 112 Congratulations on finding a woman you seem to love and being able to go out and enjoy yourself with her, but really a kiss on the cheek is not going to do anything to your hearing. You start to become a bit schizophrenic with tinnitus and hyperacusis so don't worry about something like that. Now if you end up going to a loud event like a concert wear ear protection and even at a loud restaurant be cautious with where you are sitting.

Really in the end, don't let tinnitus and hyperacusis stop you from what the real you would be doing without it. You can't always stop things from happening in your life so just make the best of what you have right now because things could be 100x worse than what you haven now (although it is already a terrible thing). You could have no arms or legs or could possibly have lost your ability to talk. You just never know what can happen. So just be thankful of the fact that you've met a woman that you enjoy being with in your life at the moment and take things from there.

From the way I look at it, we have a bright future for hearing treatments and the only dark side about it is that we don't know when it'll be available. So like I said just enjoy life how it is now. You can't always change how things are and end up to be.

I've realized over time that the brain is plastic and does the best of it's ability to change itself when recovering from damage to itself to where it allows you to live your life in the best way possible. So try and be nice to your own brain because it'll give it right back to you.

Hope things get better for you and that your relationship with this woman becomes stronger.

 

Thanks Nick I really appreciate you takeing the time to replyI try to wear them as needed like obvious situations for example whether it be using the vacuum cleaner or going to loud public areas such as the comedy show we went to just the other week.Its just I don't wear them as often as I did,I'm using them less and less and I'm afraid it may be a blessing or a curse and that's what I'm afraid of,that I'm using them less for her and that it might not be the smartest thing to do....or is it?As far as the kiss goes it just has me all worried and panicked,it happened a month ago and my ears have been good and horrible since but maybe it is just down to me worrying about them.Im finally in love and I'm just worried that I'm gonna screw my ears and ruin everything

 

Hi @bill 112, I echoed the warm wishes and good advice offered by others here.

My two cents: I think, in part, you are letting anxiety take the upper hand. Try to block out catastrophic thinking ("I am gonna screw my ears AND ruin everything!")

Take number one: Have you really screwed up your ears for good. Very, very unlikely. Instead, try: "Hey, I am having good days and bad days, just like before. It will pass, just like before. I am being wise not to overprotect my ears but if I need to sometimes, its OK."

And number two: Are you ruining everything?? Seems like you are doing really well. Try this: "I am going through a bad patch, but it will pass. Hey, I have really worked hard on adapting on my T and H, and I am 80 percent better, except for this rough spot. And I AM IN LOVE! With a wonderful woman who is considerate and understanding of my condition."

Good luck, and enjoy your life and new love.

 

Let me get this straight, you're worried about a kiss on the cheek affecting your T and H?

 

Kiss on the cheek should be fine, but kiss on the ear can cause hearing loss - the so-called "kiss of deaf":
http://www.nbcnews.com/health/innocent-kiss-deaf-can-cause-permanent-hearing-loss-591238

 

I'm not sure what to make of this. Wouldn't a suction have to be strong enough to cause a ruptured eardrum to cause any significant (permanent) damage to hearing?

I wondered this too, because I was wearing wax earplugs the night before my T kicked into full gear (I did have a 'blast' acoustic trauma several days before). I thought I was recovering okay from the acoustic trauma and felt fine the day before, then as I woke up I pulled my wax earplugs out and noticed the loud ringing that has been there ever since.

 

Suction sounds can be very dangerous - as a safety measure any type of suction and similar activity will have to be kept at a safe distance from the ears, no higher than under the belt area - as per the Occupational Safety and Health Administration's guidelines.


http://www.OSHA.org/accoustic-trauma/suction-guidelines2015.html

 

Its all true. Its happened to someone in my family.

 

This is the strangest thread.
@bill 112 If the issue is that the plugs are too conspicuous, get some low-profile transparent earplugs. Also grow your hair out so it covers your ears and no one will know ;-)
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B013H8FUVA?psc=1&redirect=true&ref_=oh_aui_detailpage_o05_s00

 

The kiss was on my cheek directly beside my ear,immediately after I had a sharp pain and fullness in my ear for a few days after and my T and H have kinda been acting up ever sinceJust don't know if it's caused any further damage and I'm really worried it has....