Confused, and Blaming Myself — Are My Symptoms Noise-Induced?

Discussion in 'Support' started by Fire2Flowers, Jul 21, 2019.

    1. Fire2Flowers
      Balanced

      Fire2Flowers Member

      Location:
      United States
      Tinnitus Since:
      November 17th, 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Generalized Anxiety Disorder
      I have had tinnitus since November 17th, 2017. I was 18 years old at the time. I remember the date exactly, because of the impact it had on me.

      I was listening to very loud music with my earbuds, which is the worst thing I could have done, and all of the sudden I get this piercing ringing in both of my ears. I was convinced I have permanently damaged my hearing, and that this will never fade. But it was odd that other symptoms showed up as well. My ears itched horribly, there were feelings of fullness, swelling, and even sharp pains. After two weeks of this nonsense, I went to a nurse practitioner to see what was wrong. She took one look in my ears and told me there were large quantities of fluid trapped inside (Otitis Media) and that I did nothing to damage my hearing. She told me it would go away once the fluid did, and I was prescribed antibiotics for my ears.

      During the next few weeks my tinnitus significantly decreases, but it is still there. I would still hear it quietly humming in the background whenever I focused on it, in my right ear. If I was in a quiet place, I would hear it. If I was trying to sleep or relax, same deal. But I wouldn't hear it as much when listening to soft music, ASMR (to help me sleep), or if I was focused on something else. Six months after that, I'm in the hospital due to an anxiety attack that I mistook for a heart attack. I mentioned my tinnitus, and after the doctor looks inside he told me he can still see "a little fluid" in my ears. Still, after so long? I'm now thinking that this can't possibly be an infection.

      After that year passes, and I can finally afford to see another GP. This one looks in my ears and tells me that my ears are clean, and that my ringing comes from an "eustachian tube dysfunction" and chronic dermatitis. He prescribes me with a topical, which I've been using ever since. After my first episode of tinnitus, I've been adamant about keeping low volumes as often as possible. I regularly test my hearing, I put the prescriptions in my ears, and I always record signs of change. For a while, this seemed to be working, and there were even times when I could meditate and hear silence, just like when I was little. But now the ringing has gotten louder, they still itch like it's nobody's business, I still get ear fullness (which makes my tinnitus much worse until it fades), they're both swollen, and the sharp pains have gotten worse.

      I think one thing has changed, I'm able to stop hearing it completely during very quick periods of silence, or whenever I truly am focused on something else. Silence, until I plug my ears or try to relax in any way. Then I hear it blaring like alarm bells.

      >I've always had anxiety, I'm bad at managing stress.
      >My drops work sometimes, but not during others.
      >All the other symptoms, like the tinnitus, never fade for good.
      >I hear silence sometimes, but not during others.

      All I want is for it to stop, but there's a little part of me that believes it never will. I am somewhat convinced this is all noise-induced. I feel like it will never fade, and it is all my fault. Has anything similar happened to anyone else?
       
      • Hug Hug x 5
    2. Daniel Lion
      Ape-like

      Daniel Lion Member Benefactor

      Location:
      SE Asia
      Tinnitus Since:
      2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise trauma, hearing loss
      It’s not your fault... stop saying that and be nice to yourself.

      You don’t deserve this, nobody does.

      You mentioned you have problems coping with anxiety and that you have also experienced moments of silence.

      You must start developing coping, breathing, meditation practices ASAP... this will help you in the long run for everything that challenges you.

      You need a good ENT to find out what the freak is going on with your ETD, is it getting better?

      My inclination, my instinct tells me, you will be OK. It doesn’t sound like chronic , debilitating tinnitus, it sounds like it’s annoying as hell and sometimes fades.

      Protect your ears, no earbuds, loud noise exposure, and cool your jets. It should, or it often does fade for many people, hopefully you too.

      Stay strong, you're not alone... keep us updated to how your doing.

      Daniel
       
      • Like Like x 2
      • Hug Hug x 1
    3. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Fire2Flowers
      Balanced

      Fire2Flowers Member

      Location:
      United States
      Tinnitus Since:
      November 17th, 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Generalized Anxiety Disorder
      Thank you for this, Daniel! You've no idea how much better this makes me feel. I hope it fades for me.
       
      • Hug Hug x 1
    4. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Fire2Flowers
      Balanced

      Fire2Flowers Member

      Location:
      United States
      Tinnitus Since:
      November 17th, 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Generalized Anxiety Disorder
      I've had tinnitus for at least three years, and I'm starting to think it will always be this way. I am on the verge of tears, desperately seeking answers. People say they've gotten better within a couple weeks to a couple years. But two years have already passed for me. I feel like my time for recovery is over, and now there is nothing I will be able to do.

      Will I be able to sleep with silence ever again? My tinnitus is destroying me.

      I'm hitting a low point...My tinnitus is so loud when I'm trying to relax or sleep, but it's goes away whenever I am preoccupied. Are there any success stories of tinnitus elimination with those who've had it for three years or longer? Is there any hope for me?
       
    5. just1morething
      Benevolent

      just1morething Member Benefactor

      Location:
      U.S.
      Tinnitus Since:
      2008
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      barotrauma, noise exposure, TMJ, neck?
      I have the same problem but have had tinnitus much longer than you. I'm not sure if CBT would help you? Dr. Shulman mentioned that to me the other day. I expected to have him call me back again as I left another message but he hasn't yet. He did mention some type of new brain mapping for some reason.

      I posted it on the forum. I know the noise is frustrating and annoying. I only have an occasional good day for some reason. Hard to duplicate.
       
      • Friendly Friendly x 1
    6. ChrisBoyMonkey

      ChrisBoyMonkey Member Podcast Patron

      Location:
      CA
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      U.S. Army/Field Artillery Veteran / loud computer
      I've had it much shorter than you have, although mine has recently become even more severe than before. I'm hoping it's just a temporary spike.

      As for it reducing or going away, have you checked out the treatments threads lately? Everyone has been excited over Neuromod Lenire lately. I'm in the US it's still only in Ireland but even I have signed up for it, and hope to do a personal import for the device to bring it back. I hope I get contacted soon.
       
      • Hug Hug x 1
    7. zhiyuan
      Depressed

      zhiyuan Member

      Location:
      China
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      sudden hearing loss
      I am sorry to hear that. Maybe @billie48's story can help you. And you can try Lenire, which is now taking to appointments.
       
      • Hug Hug x 1
    8. just1morething
      Benevolent

      just1morething Member Benefactor

      Location:
      U.S.
      Tinnitus Since:
      2008
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      barotrauma, noise exposure, TMJ, neck?
      I wonder if they sell them through an Audiologist? I tried SoundCure in the past and it didn't seem to work. I haven't followed Lenire too closely but did see pictures of it. Not exactly sure how it even works. Will it be available in the US soon?
       
    9. Michael B
      Supportive

      Michael B Member Benefactor

      Location:
      San Diego, CA
      Tinnitus Since:
      2011
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Stupidity
      I can't say elimination but acceptance and that made a difference.
       
      • Optimistic Optimistic x 1
    10. Juan

      Juan Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      08/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Several causes
      You have to explore that. Do you hear tinnitus louder or lower when you wake up or are dozing off?

      I think T in some cases is related to brain activity. When we wake up, specially those days when we are very sleepy, we can see how it changes, at least in my case.

      And sometimes, sadly, it flares up too for no reason.
       
      • Like Like x 1
    11. Digital Doc

      Digital Doc Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2018
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      noise induced
      Yes, this is noise induced. Avoid any and all further exposure to noise the best you can. Dont use the headphones ever again. You habituated quite a bit so far, and hope it continues.
       
    12. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Fire2Flowers
      Balanced

      Fire2Flowers Member

      Location:
      United States
      Tinnitus Since:
      November 17th, 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Generalized Anxiety Disorder
      Usually when I'm dozing off. If I'm not stressed and if I'm not lying down, I can hear silence. But if I'm releasing any tension in my body, and if I'm focusing on it, it gets loud.

      It also changes pitches, depending on if I am plugging my ears or not.
       
    13. Juan

      Juan Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      08/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Several causes
      It can be a central perception of sound problem, basically the brain, or your neck too.
       

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