Feeling Desperate, Any Advice Please

Hi
Sorry to be back so soon to ask for help.
But things have gone from terrible to (almost) unbearable. I've had T since September last year and it got much worse two weeks ago following noise trauma some time before (resulting from medical incompetance I think). I now seem unable to mask it at all and there are about 6 noises which take it in turns to torment me. I've gone from a pretty happy person to severely depressed and with little or no desire to carry on. This is not at all my personality and I have never felt like this before. It is just the constant, inescapble loud noises have left me desperate and near despair. I've considered asking for some benzodiazipin type drugs to get me through but am worried about further hearing damage.
I'm not sure what help I'm asking for on TT but just had to do something. My family are being great but no one (including me) knows what to do.
I'm sorry to lay this on people, as i know that many on this site are also struggling.
Thanks
Rupert

 

me , I'm on 2 x 5mg diazpan but being tapered off ...... 2.5mg Olanzapine in the morn and 5mg Olanzapine and 30mg Metizipine .. I'm a wreck but the nighttimes stuff gets me asleep - you have to not focus on the noise and I have good weeks bad weeks ..... its a rollercoaster

 

Dear barnacle,
I too have unbearably loud hi frequency T in my left ear which started on October 28, 2015 due to ear infections. My GP tried antibiotics and steroids which eliminated my ear infections but left Mr. T screaming in my ear. I visited an ENT on November 23rd. and the first thing he said was "There is no FDA approved treatment and you need to learn to live with the ringing". Needless to say I felt like punching him in the mouth but I did not want to add legal problems to my situation.

I have since had a MRI, tube insertion and three steroid injections into my middle ear. I have also taken herbal solutions and Arches Tinnitus products since early January. Unfortunately the only change I perceived was a lighter wallet :-(

Over the Christmas holidays I was in very bad shape and having constant anxiety and panic attacks. I could not sleep more than 2 hours per night and life as I knew it had completely fell apart. On December 20th. I had a severe panic attack and in a dark moment I took a hand full of prescription drugs.... but as you can guess I did not take enough to get rid of the T once and for all. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT attempt what I did, it got me a one way ticket to a hospital but there was a silver lining. I met a wonderful Psychiatrist who specialized in treating Tinnitus, chronic pain and PTSD, I have been seeing her ever since.

I am a 59 year old male who has never been on any prescription drugs until T invaded my life. However, my Psychiatrist has prescribed Cymbalta for anxiety and depression, Hydroxyzine for insomnia, Clonodine for hypertensive crisis and Ativan as needed for panic attacks. All because of an ear infection!

Now for the good news, although my T persists and I still have very bad days, the medications literally saved my life. Sure, I was scared of the benzos side effects and addictive nature but forget this as you need help coming to terms with Tinnitus and the horrendous symptoms that can totally destroy your life. It's sort of a weird thing but the meds have pushed my T to the background, my anxiety and depression is now under control. I am also sleeping better and having fewer panic attacks.

Please see your GP immediately and tell him or her about your symptoms, DO NOT hold back. I suggest asking for a referral to a Psychiatrist or Neurologist, they are better suited to administer meds and help with relaxation training and habitation. Will I be on these drugs the rest of my life? Quite possibly, but a good doctor will only prescribe a minimum workable dosage and will watch you for side effects, at least my Doctor does this.

I wish you the very best and although this is hard to believe, it definitely gets better. I hope and pray you achieve peace and I am sure you have the fortitude to slay the dragon named Tinnitus. Hang in there!

 

@barnacle sorry to hear that it got worse. there is no need to apologize, thats what TT is here for. what exactly was your noise trauma?

 

At this point your anxiety is cementing the tinnitus deeper in your brain. I highly recommend you get something to calm your nerves which are hyper excited. Xanax is a benzo with a reputation of lowering tinnitus volume, which is what you need, but you still have to be careful. Please take the time to research benzos on this forum. To my understanding, you'll want to start with a low dose and taper off very gradually to avoid a rebound effect. I think Lyrica has also been mentioned as a safer alternative. That's just going from memory.

I totally sympathize with you. My first eight months were sheer hell. After that it began to improve a bit, but I am definitely not who I was before. I still remain optimistic; however, I am far from happy about what has happened to my previously high-functioning and productive life.

Edit to add, here's the Tinnitus Talk thread on Lyrica. It's kind of ambiguous whether it would be helpful or not.

 

Oh what to do? My doctor in which I have not much faith in and the care system I'm locked into. I belong to aHMO type system and feel as though I'm just another patient in which they can only spend 15 minutes with per visit. Not much time to talk over your problems. My phvratrist is just about the same way 15 minutes and it seems that I know more about the T's than she does. Maybe next I should see a neurologist for 15 minutes! It seems he only good info on our T's comes right from here! Anyway just trying to keep a stiff upper lip and hopeing that I can self manage myself out of this junk. But so far it seems to be going downhill. Right now I feel cold as the anxity is going full force and I feel tired and depressed. Oh what todo?

 

Hi
Thanks for your reply and sorry to hear that you are having a tough time too and hope things begin to imporve. Do you hear the T all the time, including outside? I too was thinking about diazipin. Do you know much about the side effects and if its OK for tinnitus?
Hope good weeks get more frequent and bad weeks less so. Look after yourself.
Cheers
Barnacle (not sure why I chose that name!)

 

Hi
I really really appreciate your reply. Your situation sounds similar to mine and you gave me some much needed hope. But I am sorry that you have been through such a tough time. I have kind of taken your advice and have now got linked up with the local mental health crisis team. I never thought this would ever apply to me and it kind of brings it all home. It is a nightmare but maybe there is a way to start climbing out. Glad the psychiatris you have been seeing is so good. Though made me chuckle when I read that you had been seeing your psychiatrist and I wondered whether you meant romantically!
Anyhow, am off to try the valium have been prescribed, unless I decide that possible ototoxicity is not worth taking chance. Look after yourself and keep in touch.
Cheers

 

Thanks Zora and I hope your are doing OK. I am completely obessessing about what I thi bk caused it and blaming myself for listening to doctors. But if its OK I prefer not to say what caused it, as I dont really wnat to write it down. I know that sounds crazy but I thibnk I have gone a little bit crazy!
Look after yourself.

 

Hm :/ ok...

 

Hi Cheza
Thanks for your reply and I hope you are doing OK and notching up the pages in the T book. I have now got some valium from the GP. I think Lyrica is strong anti-epilepsy drug with very serious side effects. So might give that a miss! You sound like a fighter and I think you will get back to your high functioning life. I am meant to be speaking at a socio-legal studies conference in a few weeks time and will just have to email and apologise for dropping out with so little notice. I aggreed to speak when I was feeling not to bad but cannot imagine even getting there now.
Today I went down the wood by the little stream here and could still here the T like it was filling the wood. Can you hear your outside at all? I just wonder because it seems so sad that I want to know whether other people have the same and cope with it and if so how. Should I just keep going outside and will eventually begin to ignore yhe sound. At the moment I'm pinned to the compueter betwen teh stereo speakers (on at safe level) with TV on behind me and chatting to family memebr to keep mind occupied.
Take care and speak soon.

 

Ok. It was microsuction at ENT and I should have said no to it! Am obessing about the moment I didnt say no.

 

You mean ear wax removal? Dont blame urself. i basically gave myself T by listening too loud to music via headphones. I still struggle bc Its my own fault and I should have known the consequences. But you didnt! Sometimes ENTs do that and say that it will help. You couldnt have known in advance. but I understand you, its always a thinking like: "why did I do that?...such a big mistake...if I only could turn back time" and so on...these are the thoughts probably torturing you, but how could u have known? You could not!
i know that obsessive feeling. but we cannot turn back time. Dont let these thoughts torture you! In hindsight we are always smarter. You only wanted relief like everyone with T. But what happened happened...Im sorry, I hope it will get better!

 

About a year and a half ago, tinnitus changed me like I didn't think was possible.
I don't even want to talk about it.
Luckily I discovered a good treatment. ... https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/back-to-silence.7172/