How Do You Keep Your Job in the Beginning? I Cannot Work...

Discussion in 'Support' started by Barry33, Dec 28, 2017.

    1. Barry33

      Barry33 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Hi - I'm a wreck from hell since getting tinnitus 3-4 weeks ago. I'm 46, divorced, 2 lovely daughters who are under my health insurance.

      There is literally no way I can work and I just started this new job 3 months ago and I'm in charge of a huge project.

      But I'm absolutely serious when I say there is no way I can work in that high stress environment at this time, running meetings etc., etc. Just thinking about it or how and when I'm going to tell my boss (that I need to be out sick or disability TDI) causes me great anxiety even now as I write this.

      I can't lose my job...but it is impossible for me to work currently. I break down and cry several times a day because of the tinnitus. How would I hide that at work. I haven't read a lot on here how anyone can deal with this nightmare and have a job.

      I have sick leave and there is short term TDI at my workplace and I'm going to get the paperwork for it this week. But eventually it will all run out and then what..... I've suffered from depression and anxiety long before getting tinnitus and was already having extreme stress before this even started. Now im a train wreck...need advice pls
       
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    2. Michael Leigh

      Michael Leigh Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Brighton, UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/1996
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced
      It is not easy to be at work when tinnitus is loud and intrusive @Barry33 and I'm sorry to say there is no way to sugar coat this and say that it's doable because it isn't. With time and medication in the form and anti-depressant a lot can be achieved. Counselling with a Hearing Therapist can help a lot too. The good news though, tinnitus does improve with time.

      Talk to your doctor and explain how you feel.
      All the best
      Michael
       
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    3. Cheza
      Wishful

      Cheza Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Oregon
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Barking dogs/stress
      People who suffer from depression and anxiety, and especially when undergoing extreme stress for a prolonged period of time, are more susceptible to tinnitus.

      I think you will find that if you take too much time off from work, it really won't help because all it will do is add to your stress and you won't have anything to focus on except your tinnitus. Then you'll become even more anxious and the tinnitus will feed off that.

      I agree with Michael, medication would probably be a good thing for you at this time. Xanax is probably the most popular prescribed remedy for tinnitus, because it actually does lower the volume. That will help you to concentrate at work, and it will have the dual benefit of lowering your anxiety. However, it's a benzodiazepine, so be very careful not to become dependent on it. You might also consider cognitive behavioral therapy. See Dr. Hubbard's Tinnitus Story. (He's a member here.). Try the Back to Silence method, too. Your tinnitus is new and may respond well.

      What you're going through is very familiar to those of us who were hit with severe tinnitus. Be patient with yourself. The first months are the worst months.
       
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    4. glynis
      Feminine

      glynis Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      2004
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Meniere's Disease
      I would have a talk to your boss if you can do reduced hours as having trouble with tinnitus and trying find ways to cope with it and tell them its causing you stress learning to adapt .
      You would like to know what help is available in your work place to support you along with your doctors support .
      Maybe a shorter day for a few weeks.
      Love glynis
       
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    5. Jason37

      Jason37 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      06/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Gunshot
      Was it noise induced?
       
    6. JohnnyMx
      Sunshine

      JohnnyMx Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      Apr/2013
      Hi Barry,

      The best thing you can do right now, is going to see a therapist and counselling.
      Less than 1 percent, have VERY SEVERE Tinnitus, the one that really can put a person in a disability position, not able to work, concentrate.

      I think, maybe 90% does not care about Tinnitus, just have it, but does not pay attention to it and have never did it.
      The rest 9% (I'm just making numbers for what I've read) do suffer from having Tinnitus, although it could be mild. In this cases, anxiety and depression play a big role. I have found, that most of the people that are suffering from having T, and that does not have a very severe form, have suffered from anxiety and depression in the past, before the unset.
      My advise will be, strongly, go to see a therapist and counselling, and for sure you will be much, much, much better in couple of weeks, regardless your T.

      I'm a software engineer, I struggled with T for 1 year, was a living vegetable. My problem was based on anxiety and depression, once i figured how to solve the mental side of T, or minimize them, things were ALOT easier and I just make the peace with T. Today, I just don't care about the sound, and I can fully concentrate at my work. In retrospective, my mistake in the past, that gave me to 1 year of suffering, was not looking for professional help sooner, and I learned the hard way.

      Anything you need from this great forum and people, just ask.
       
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    7. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Barry33

      Barry33 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      thx for the response my doctor prescribed me Lexapro and Zoloft (I can choose which I want) and Xanax but he said only Xanax for emergencies. I just got the meds yesterday and am rly worried as to which I should take..the Lexapro or Zoloft?
       
    8. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Barry33

      Barry33 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I read you main long post for people who are new to tinnitus i thank you for that. Is there a particular anti depressant you recommend? Im rly struggling with that decision right now....and i just got all the meds last night and haven't take any of them yet. Do you suggest one? Or through all you've learned recommend one over the other? I have the choices of Lexapro or Zoloft. I have Xanax too but he only gave me a few of those pills for emergencies....
       
    9. MBH

      MBH Member

      Location:
      Upstate NY
      Tinnitus Since:
      06/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Overloaded stress
      Mine is head T and 6 months into it. Now I never had anxiety until T came along. So i had to work with that as well. And trying to work how do I say difficult. This is how it went, being type A went to B but I didn't say anything at work they thought I was A. I work on stuff I knew I could do with my eyes closed and i did not start any new projects or inventing the wheel. I took walks around the building or I went for cigarette break and I don't smoke. I also took my time. And I didn't talk to people. Co-workers ask why I wasn't talking I just smiled at them. And when I final got myself together I lateraled my position. I work with 30 on the floor. I have too many years. I skimmed by but I made it work. It got better after 4 months. I'm not a top boss, but I know how cripping T is and hanging in there.
       
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    10. Michael Leigh

      Michael Leigh Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Brighton, UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/1996
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced
      Hi @Barry33

      I am unable to recommend an antidepressant for you because each person is different. I believe you should take what your doctor recommends. An antidepressant can help a lot in preventing you from become too down due to the tinnitus. Please allow 6 to 8 weeks for it to reach full effect.

      Best of luck
      Michael
       
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    11. glynis
      Feminine

      glynis Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      2004
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Meniere's Disease
      @Barry33 ,
      Amitriptyline or Nortriptyline would be my choice of AD meds.
      Love glynis
       
    12. Cheza
      Wishful

      Cheza Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Oregon
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Barking dogs/stress
      I'm not a doctor, so I only have basic understanding of the drugs you mentioned. Lexapro and Zoloft are selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, which can elevate or balance your mood. They're usually prescribed for depression and anxiety. They are not benzos, so I think that's why your doc said only use Xanax in an emergency. He's looking out for your best interest by doing that, because it's really easy to get addicted to benzos.

      You can go to www.drugs.com and research Lexapro and Zoloft. Whichever one you take, make sure you don't take any supplements that are contraindicated for either medication.

      If it were me, I'd choose Zoloft because it's also helpful for obsessive compulsive disorder. It's very easy to become OCD about tinnitus, so that might be the better choice. Ask your doc what he thinks about that reasoning.
       
    13. Red
      Crappy

      Red Member

      Location:
      Northeast USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      06/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise Exposure (Headphones)
      Any reason you cannot work?
      Are you unable to concentrate? Is your workplace noisy and hurts your ears?
      Or is it only emotional?

      No right or wrong answers and I am not judging but it would be helpful to know.
       
    14. pef

      pef Member

      Location:
      Georgia, USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      3/16/2013
      I was 46 when my T came on. I was very stressed for four weeks. But after a while I realized that being stressed about my T was taking a lot of energy. And when I forced myself to focus on work, I had small victories - I didn't notice my T for 10 minutes, then 20 minutes, then hours.

      I realized I have another 40 years to go, hopefully more. And I had kids and a family to support. So I just willed myself to accept the T for what it was - my new lifelong partner. In a few weeks I turned the corner.

      Good luck. Focus on your work, focus on your kiddos, and think about how lucky you are to have them.
       
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    15. valeri

      valeri Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Australia
      Tinnitus Since:
      09/2011
      @Barry33
      My advice would be to talk to your boss and explain what you are going through.
      The stress of tinnitus is huge enough to additionally worry if you’re not performing well, will somebody complaint to the boss, what will they think if you need to take sick day or come to work looking like a madman!
      Knowing that your work supports you will ease the pressure until you get yourself back on your feet.
      And you will!
      For the time being you need to look after yourself and ease the pressure.
      Reduce the hours, cut back a day, work from home.....whatever it takes to get better!
      Good luck!
       
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    16. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Barry33

      Barry33 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Was getting better the last few days...tinnitus was lower was feeling pretty good. And I took none of the meds my doc gave me. But then today, i feel asleep on the couch ONLY for like 10 minutes...like a power nap and when i woke up my tinnitus exploded...the loudest its ever been. unreal... i dont get why tinnitus is so loud when you wake up. I read a lot about why is does....but you have to sleep. Def about to take the Xanax my doc gave me. Tinnitus is pretty unreal to overcome. I dont like how its so loud after sleeping. Like its always like that for me.
       
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    17. Tweaker
      Transparent

      Tweaker Member Benefactor

      Location:
      UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      05/2010
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise exposure
      Talk to your employer. I was off for 5 weeks and then phased back in. I was a wreck too. Still am some days now but work full time. You'll get there.
       
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    18. sjtinguy

      sjtinguy Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      11/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      noise
      Hey Barry.. I got my tinnitus from noise in November, at least partially from my loud work environment. I ended up taking the entire month of December off because working was too stressful and my ears could not handle the noise even with ear protection.

      I am very thankful I took the month off. My ears have recovered so much in that time and I have also gotten mentally so much more stable. I have learned many coping strategies and found various tools like background noise and various other sounds to help keep me distracted. I can sleep through the night now and can work reduced hours while wearing ear protection and not get an increase in tinnitus. I am still taking it easy going forward but I am optimistic for the future, where as a month ago I was worried I would never be able to work that job again. It doesn't sound like your job is noisy, but the stress alone can make your ears scream.

      Take medical leave to allow yourself to heal and become more stable. Take as much time as you can and need. I hope your boss is understanding. I find people don't always get it at first but if you describe the symptoms often people realize it's not just some minor thing.
       
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    19. Jomo

      Jomo Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      9/4/16
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      going for a rim shot on the snare drum.
      Thats normal man..resorting to a drug for just that aspect is just going to give you another problem in the long run..try using masking apps to help you get through the day
       
    20. linearb
      Psychedelic

      linearb Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      beliefs are makyo and reality ignores them
      Tinnitus Since:
      1999
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      karma
      I did it one day at a time and when I had to grit my teeth all day and then leave an hour early and go home and force myself to listen to guided meditations while crying -- then I did that.

      Haven't had a day that bad in a long, long time, but if I do, then I'll have to try to respond the same way. Fingers crossed. I do take benzos from time to time, though that's something I did long before tinnitus was a problem.
       
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    21. Alue
      No Mood

      Alue Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic Trauma
      I did because I didn't have a choice unless I were to quit and burn through savings. Nobody at work understood how tough it was, and since the tinnitus was caused by a workplace injury, my boss didn't want me to have any lost time. I'm actually surprised how many people here were able to take extended leaves of absence for tinnitus.

      I kind of wish I had the ability to take some time off and let my ears recover as I had to work around some noisy equipment...
       
      Last edited: Jan 4, 2018
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    22. Jomo

      Jomo Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      9/4/16
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      going for a rim shot on the snare drum.
      i never missed a day of work....my onset occured on a sunday so the initial crazy OMG HELP day passed and I had a chance to research on how to adjust...the first night was hard...couldnt sleep...i downloaded an app called white noise on my iphone that i read about online and searched for anything that would give me relief...i found that cricket sounds helped so much...was able to get sleep and showed up to work late...i then worked a full day and stuck with the masking sounds as i worked....it was hard to do anything...i definitely struggled...as time went on though i found other masking sounds and i went to see an ENT and got prescribe prednisone a week later..took it for a day due to side effects...the T eventually faded compared to the hell it originally was...i didnt just experience T during that period though...my H was bad...sensitive as hell to everything...it took time but i adapted and my H got better but i really didnt get better until recently..i def think the prednisone helped with that...all i can say is hang in there...it does get better....even go on youtube and see if you can find anything that will give you some sort of relief
       
    23. DebInAustralia
      No Mood

      DebInAustralia Member Benefactor Hall of Fame Advocate

      Location:
      Geelong, Victoria
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2013

      Hi Barry,

      So sorry to hear that you have t. Do you know what caused it? Not all t is permanent, or it may reduce with time.

      Since your onset is new, it might be something you can treat.

      Consider hbot, stem cells, steroid taper?

      Have you had an extended audiogram?

      I am in no doubt that you are a train wreck right now. I was too in the beginning. I met my t and h 4 years ago, and Ill never forget my early days with it. I was a mess. Really thought I wouldnt be able to function at work, sleep, or ever enjoy life again. What a difference time (habituation) and (stems) makes to ones perspective!

      Sleep was my biggest issue. I was so exhausted. Do what you have to get plenty of shut eye. I didnt resort to sleeping tablets, but if you feel you need to, then i cant see the harm in asking your dr for something like temazepam (short half life) to get you off to sleep. If you prefer something natural, try melatonin (ask for the slow release version). Herbs such as valerian and passionflower are relaxing too.

      It isnt necessary to tell anyone anything at this stage, unless that is what you want to do.

      I eventually let my boss know that I had new t. She was expectedly undertanding and compassionate.

      If you choose to tell your employer, and you feel discriminated against in any way, then you know there are channels to help support you through this, but hopefully you wont need to worry about that.

      I am sure your employer appreciates you. I dont think you are going to lose your job over this. Its a gliche. Feels like the end of the world right now, but you will get a handle on it (if you have to).

      For now, its about survival.

      I have a job that requires a lot of mental concentration. I can reassure you that I have been involved in work situations, which have reaffirmed what I doubted my brain could do when need be: focus on other things!

      I personally would shy away from taking time off, even with severe t (as mine is) because I think the distraction of keeping busy at work will help you take your focus off the noise. I took 2 weeks off from work initially because I was so sleep deprived. However, my return to work, helped me regain my confidence in being able to focus on other things, and still perform my job well. It was also uplifting to rejoin my colleagues and friends and talk about other things!

      I can hear the desperation, anxiety and depression in your post.

      I also get the sense that you are a strong and resilient person, obviously had your fair share of ups and downs in life. Have a little faith in your ability to adapt. You can do this.

      remember:

      . if possible, try hbot, stems, prednisolone taper if relevant
      . get an extended audiogram/find yourself a supportive audiologist
      . it still might go: so help it along by focusing on other things (easier said than done) and getting plenty of sleep and relaxation. Stay away from noise/protect your ears. (plenty of posts about this so wont elaborate here)
      . stay connected to people and work (if you can)
      . if you want to talk to me about my experiences with stem cells, i am happy to share. just pm me.
      . have a read of the back to silence thread on here, and the video. gives real hope for those struggling with habituation
      . have a look at Julian cowan hills youtube videos on tinnitus. do what you can to calm down your cns/anxiety. that will hopefully impact in a positive way on your adapting to your t.
      . if you need to, you can mask your t. there are heaps of apps available online. find one that matches your t and listen to it when you are bothered (which will be most of the time atm) by your t. There are in ear maskers available. Best you speak to an audio about this. I think Michael Leigh uses one?
      . keep coming back here. we all understand your fear right now.
       
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    24. Michael B
      No Mood

      Michael B Member Benefactor

      Location:
      San Diego
      Tinnitus Since:
      '11
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise Induced
      I had difficulty working in the beginning and applied for medical leave. I was out for 6 weeks. My HR person never heard of tinnitus but got an education by the time I got done talking to her. It was one of the best things I ever did to help me cope with my tinnitus.
       
    25. Philippe79

      Philippe79 Member Benefactor

      Location:
      England
      Tinnitus Since:
      June / 2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      H.F.H.L.
      I didn’t have any choice either but to carry on. I just had a word with my manager and he sounded very understanding, though deep down I doubt he truly understood. Luckily, I knew my job like the back of my hand, this was key (i’d been doing it 19 years), as long as I wasn’t getting too stressed I pulled through, though some days I remember having to leave a little early because by the end of the day it was getting a bit too much and I was feeling a little emotional. Don’t know if a coincidence, but a few weeks after that chat with the manager, ear plugs/defenders were made compulsory. I wish it was like that when I first started!
       
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    26. Alue
      No Mood

      Alue Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic Trauma
      Yep. After my injury signs were put up "hearing protection required in this area". The funny thing is I always wore hearing protection when necessary before my hearing injury. My hearing was damaged when there should have been no reason to have hearing protection in. I was actually threatened by management to not talk about my injury or symptoms with other coworkers, and they never reported it on the OSHA300A.

      I should stop talking about the injury as it stirs up old anger...
       
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    27. Rubenslash

      Rubenslash Member

      Location:
      Zurich
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Bad luck and bad decisions
      Went to my job a couple of times with 0 hours sleep, somehow managed to survive.

      I didn't have anxiety though so I could concentrate at work. The lack of sleep was the main problem. Even before tinnitus it took me at least 30 mins to 1 hour to fall asleep, after that trauma it took me about 6-8 hours. Now I am back around 45 mins- 1 hour lol.
       
    28. Fangen
      Moonlighting

      Fangen Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Stockholm, Sweden
      Tinnitus Since:
      December 2nd, 2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic trauma (loud concert for 1h)
      I was home maybe 2-3 days at max when I first got T, I was fairly new at my job (been there a few months) and I didn't want my manager to think I was some kind of slacker and really wanted to keep the job.

      For me, work was the relief from a lot of negative thoughts. Even when I have really bad spikes or some kind of scare/trauma I tend to go to work anyways because I have a great team with people I like to work and hang out with, they take my mind of anxiety and T. I work at an office so it is fairly quiet but sometimes people talk a little (not loud) and it makes enough masking and suck that I don't think about it. When I type on my keyboard I also don't really hear my T either, so it is like going to work to get a few hours of masking and distractions. Of course, it was a loud work environment I'd have a tougher time to return, but at least I was in sort of luck that had left retail before (with music playing in the backgrounds) earlier that year into a more comfortable and quiet work place.
       
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    29. Chris Holland
      Movie buff

      Chris Holland Member

      Location:
      Amsterdam
      Tinnitus Since:
      November 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Life
      @Barry33

      I totally get that man, I've been on sick leave for about 2 months now and just started my job about 5 months ago.
      My contract is due for only another two months and I highly doubt they will extend it ...

      I work as an accountmanager and have to wear a headset all day making 40+ phone calls.
      There is a really high stress, high pressure kind of atmosphere and like you I'm a total wreck some days.
      Luckily I was diagnosed having a burn out so I can apply for disability for the time being but working in such a high pressure environment will definitely not be doable for me anymore for quite some time.

      Can imagine how this might be difficult for you but put your health first!
      Habituation can't come when you have stress coming out your eyeballs and don't sleep.
      For me to be honest the only thing that helped me with the severe anxiety is Xanax and I take sleeping meds.
      I'm visiting a psychiatrist now on a frequent basis and I fill my days with positive activities, there are more ways to keep your mind off tinnitus than just work so don't feel bad if you just can't.

      With all due respect to some members here, if I had a low pressure and simple tasked job then working could be beneficial but working in a fast paced high pressure environment while suffering from high anxiety and depression is not helping anyone to habituate any faster! Steady and predictable daily activities however are helpful.
       
    30. Nanny chocolate

      Nanny chocolate Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Devon
      Tinnitus Since:
      1995
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unbelievable caused by audiologist!
      Hi Chris in lovely Holland. I’ve just read about your background, horrible for you. Those of us who suffer, and I mean suffer, from anxiety and depression will find T more difficult to manage I guess. I haven’t worked for several weeks and just tried to get back into it today. I’m a Counselling therapist and don’t want to let my people down but I’m not sure it’s going to be sustainable with my own high level anxiety. I so admire those of you who have just been able to keep going to work.
       
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