Living in Hell

I've had tinnitus for more than 7 years. Only thing that helps is alcohol, pain medication, loud music and sleep.

 

HI @Odell
Listening to loud music and tinnitus dosen't usually go well together so try lowering the volume. Have you been seen at ENT about your tinnitus? Do you know what caused it?
Michael

 

No it doesn't go together, it drowns it out. Doc said it was from shooting guns. But don't understand his prognosis without anything to prove it. When they put you in a booth to listen to sounds with a set of earphones your wasting time and money. No way you can hear the tones when you already have your own tones going on.

I live with extreme tinnitus. Doesn't go away, does not change 24-7. I feel like I'm being punished by GOD for everything I have ever done in the past. It's changed my attitude and made me become someone I don't even like to be around.

 

Hi @Odell ... Just by reading your posts, above, it's easy to sense the difficult times that you are going through right now ... but please do take to heart the wise things that @Michael Leigh suggests ... things that we've all found ourselves having to do, in order to deal with our T

You don't mention which God you feel you are being punished by, but the Father of Jesus Christ would never punish you (or anyone else for that matter) for what you have done in the past ... that's why he sent his Son to pay that eternal price for you ... doesn't that show just how much he loves you?

Do ask lots of questions from the people who I know are wanting to offer their help to you on this Forum, and do visit the links that offer positive ways of dealing with what you are experiencing.

If it's your wish, I would be my pleasure to put you on our prayer list ............................ Paul

 

Welcome @Odell . I am sorry that the sources of relief you can find are alcohol and medication. I am certain you would agree that they are not the best choice, but I understand the desperation caused by the tinnitus that would drive you towards such "solutions".

Have you visited the "Success Stories" section of this forum? There is an interesting post that has details on a habituation method that seems to have helped a number of people. Perhaps it may provide some relief for you.

This is more common that you think. I believe most of us who suffer from tinnitus experience it 24/7. And I have entertained the thought that the universe was working against me (I still do for other things that are going to happen in my life). But, tinnitus is just an affliction. It is not cast upon someone by a malevolent universe or deity as punishment for your past deeds. It just happens. Sometimes due to an illness, exposure to loud sounds, or some of up were just born with it.

It is miserable, it is exasperating, and it can cause severe depression. Those things, which result from the tinnitus, can cause changes in one's behavior and can turn them into someone that they do not want to be. Some here have become recluses, others find themselves lashing out against loved ones. Tinnitus can seem like torture to the suffer, it can be traumatic; when a person suffers a traumatic experiences, that person will be effected.

The good news is that you realize that your attitude has been effected by this. That is great. It also indicates that you remember the person you were prior to the change. Will you are working, hopefully with the assistance of a doctor and possibly psychological counseling (to help with the attitude changes and the root cause of them) you can pay attention to your actions and catch yourself when you act out of character. The fact that you recognize that you attitude has changed is probably a good indicator that you can get your old self back.

I would recommend seeking psychological counseling. It seems that your tinnitus is causing you significant distress and perhaps some cognitive, psycho-dynamic, or other style of counseling may help you with that distress and, as a result, help you recover the version of yourself prior to the attitude change.

I wish you luck in your journey, and hope you find what you need. I also hope that you can find better methods of dealign with the tinnitus other than alcohol and drugs. Many in my family have died due to alcohol and drugs, and I am always concerned when people turn to those during hard times.

 

I have deep empathy for your suffering. But don't blame yourself for the past. God is love and your are one of His children. He loves you and won't curse you with tinnitus. I agree with @PMc that tinnitus is just an ailment that millions have to deal with. Even preachers and ministers have them. I have read enough posts to know that T struck at people of all background. Just the other day I was talking to a church friend who is one of gentlest and nicest person I have ever met. Yet she told me that she has had loud T for 20 years now. Her T is so loud that she sometimes has trouble hearing what people were saying to her. So what bad thing has she done to cause such curse of T? There is simply no need to add more burden of guilt on top of the mental suffering you are experiencing. So trust your God and trust in yourself. Be more positive as this can surely help to stabilize T by being calm and positive.

 

Hi. I have just joined this board, was seeking help and explanation for this. It helps me greatly! A year ago, ears started ringing "off the hooks". Has not subsided since. I have read that wine, or beer can make symptoms worse, but it helps me sleep, with melatonin also, I don't want to rely on sleeping pills, it seems to be a vicious cycle. I've also heard that glutamates can make it worse. Waking up to this is no fun. Went to 2 doctors, and an audiologist, they all looked in my ears, no wax, no sign of infection.

 

Welcome on board @michael senishen ... stay with the forum, because help will come your way as certain as day follows night! There are so many members who can offer excellent advice as you travel into your 2nd year with T.

If you wish, I would love to place you on our prayer list too! .............................. Paul

 

Hello Paul, please do!!!

 

Absolute pleasure, Michael!

 

There was a song by Depeche Mode. I think the lyrics were something like this: "I don't want to start any blasphemous rumors, but I think that God got a sick sense of humor and when I die I expect to find him laughing..."
Great song! It may draw out tinnitus a bit as well.
V.

 

I know that feeling, I listen to New wave, and 80's goth music. The only forms of sound that seem to not bother me so much. I also, if I have them, wear earplugs so I don't have to hear the bloody cars passing by my house CONSTANTLY.

 

Hi, I hope things get better for you.

I was an avid gun enthusiast before ever coming down with tinnitus and after popping off a hundred rounds or so it definitely made my ears ring and muffled my hearing.

I've had tinnitus for the past 30 years and guns had nothing to do with it. I do, however, listen to a lot of music and it doesn't effect my ability to hear the notes played or the overall songs in the least, but that's just me.

Please don't take it personal, it's not meant for you, but that brings to mind a quote:

I do not, however, think this applies to you. I don't think God works that way but won't let this devolve into a religious argument and leave it a that.

I hope you can come to terms with your tinnitus and if it can't be cured or alleviated at least learn to live with it. It's a conscious decision I made years ago have learned over time not to let it bother me.