Hi all, I'm new here and although I didn't post many of you helped me get through my initial shock back in 2010. Please bare with me as this will be long but want to be as thorough as possible to obtain accurate opinions. For me this all started with a bout of meningitis in December 2009. Or at least what they thought was meningitis as the doctors were unsure. While waiting for the infectious disease doctor they pumped me with antibotics thinking it might be the non virus kind. That's when I first noticed issues with my hearing. The IV played like a drum over and over with no relief. I was very sensitive to sound, smell and light what I assumed all due to the meningitis. When I returned home from the hospital I noticed my ear would vibrate when on the pillow. Also an every day marijuana user for at least 15 years, I smoked & felt like a fan was going off in my head. I thought nothing of it as I still haven't heard any noises. My ears became stuffy from time to time as well. Trying to forget the meningitis hangover, I made my way out one evening and played music in the car for about a half hour. The next morning I felt my head was being invaded. It was so intrusive and scary. I ran to the ENT who prescribe me some prednisone steroids which helped with the fullness and the sensitivity to sound and lowered the volume a little. For the next 4 months I was a freak. Sound was probably down to a 3 most days with spikes reaching a 5 (10 scale). If I didn't hear it I became obsessed & would go look for it in quiet rooms. It was the hardest thing I've ever experienced. Luckily for me it was gone completely by June 2010. Fast forward to now. I noticed the noise again while I had nothing playing in my Bose noise cancellation head phones. Also felt the vibration. Mine is like a light saber swung back and forth. Not constant. I listen to my headphones and music on a trip to Florida recently and I also hit my eardrum with a Q-tip. Either of those have could've caused the noise to come back. This time it is a 1 out of 10 as I can only hear at night. I also get same sensation I did previously when smoking. Now I don't mean to anger any of you were real suffers,I have read as many stories and as much data on tinnitus as I can and my sympathy goes out to all of you. I've been to the ENT, he sees nothing wrong. I'm stuck in panic. Is this another onset? Will it get bad again? Do reoccurrences still have chance for full recovery? Does this ever start gradually or is it just waiting for me to make one more mistake? So sorry for the long post just scared and know all of you have it far worse and are heroes to me with the way you have handled it. I don't know if I can be as strong as last time and as all of you. Any advice? Lost and feel alone I'm a 38 yr old healthy male. Outside of the daily weed that is. No drinking no smoking cigs.