This week has been a week of perspective changing moments for me, however small they appear to others they have definitely helped me change how I view life and T.
Last Friday during a maths lecture my closest friend received a call to say his grandfather had had a heart attack behind the wheel only minutes after dropping him off at college. 2 hours later he received a second call to say he'd died. To see a man who is normally unaffected by anything crumble in front of you is something you can't forget. We've all lost loved ones but the position this loss has left that family in is horrific. I found myself trying to console the inconsolable and this experience left me realising I can't complain about my T when this is happening constantly around the world. Yes it's annoying but it's nothing compared to that.
Regarding T itself, I starting think about why I can get down and disturbed by it. Like everyone here the volume of T naturally increases when wearing earplugs. I spent 4 with earplugs whilst refereeing on Sunday and not once did I think about T or was I annoyed by the volume. This got me thinking the noise itself must not disturb me because the increased volume would have affected me. Therefore it must be the fact it's permanent, but if the noise itself doesn't bother me why does the fact if it will go away or not disturb me. It's difficult to convey my thought process but trying to think about it differently has definitely help me the last few days.
On a happier note I got invited for interview at Cambridge which has made me generally feel happier and given me a sense that there are again other things to focus on other than T.
This week of changing perspectives has difinitely helped myself cope with T. I hope this post helps you do the same and I am aware at points it sounds like I'm belittling the troubles of T but I seriously don't mean or intend to.
All the best
Joe
Last Friday during a maths lecture my closest friend received a call to say his grandfather had had a heart attack behind the wheel only minutes after dropping him off at college. 2 hours later he received a second call to say he'd died. To see a man who is normally unaffected by anything crumble in front of you is something you can't forget. We've all lost loved ones but the position this loss has left that family in is horrific. I found myself trying to console the inconsolable and this experience left me realising I can't complain about my T when this is happening constantly around the world. Yes it's annoying but it's nothing compared to that.
Regarding T itself, I starting think about why I can get down and disturbed by it. Like everyone here the volume of T naturally increases when wearing earplugs. I spent 4 with earplugs whilst refereeing on Sunday and not once did I think about T or was I annoyed by the volume. This got me thinking the noise itself must not disturb me because the increased volume would have affected me. Therefore it must be the fact it's permanent, but if the noise itself doesn't bother me why does the fact if it will go away or not disturb me. It's difficult to convey my thought process but trying to think about it differently has definitely help me the last few days.
On a happier note I got invited for interview at Cambridge which has made me generally feel happier and given me a sense that there are again other things to focus on other than T.
This week of changing perspectives has difinitely helped myself cope with T. I hope this post helps you do the same and I am aware at points it sounds like I'm belittling the troubles of T but I seriously don't mean or intend to.
All the best
Joe
