Hoping This Community Has Some Answers for Me.

Hi,

I'm 28 and have had tinnitus as long as I can remember.

This will be long winded, but I appreciate everyone who will go through and read all of it.

Had it spike seemingly at random when I was a Teenager, but either got used to it or it went down. It's very hard to remember. Never found any particular cause despite several tests.

Around the end of December I was starting to feel like I had wax building up in my right ear, not really any pain, just a mild sense of some fullness, and started using Debrox. On January 4th this year I used the rinsing bulb (gently with some warm water) that came with the Debrox and got some wax out of the right ear and figured I'd try to left ear just in case, but nothing.
The next morning both ears were blaring. It stressed me out all day and I couldn't fall asleep at all the following night. My tinnitus has always been a pairing of a high pitched hissing and a very low rumbling (like a truck running outside of your house) that I can usually feel a little bit along with hearing it. But it was amplified to the point where very little can actually mask the hissing. I used to sleep with a fan on low, but even that was too loud for this amplified hissing. I now sleep with a much smaller quieter fan on low, as lower volumes seem to somewhat help.

The morning of the 6th I couldn't stand it and went to urgent care. The doctor said I had a little fluid build up in my right ear that appeared to already be draining the left ear looked fine. Didn't prescribe me anything since it seemed like I was already on the mend. However he recommended keeping the humidity in my house or at least my bedroom while sleeping, as the dry cold Minnesotan winter can aggravate your eustachian tubes. So I've been doing that and also have a humidifier running in my office all day. As well as using a vicks steam inhaler most days.

I scheduled a GP appointment on the 8th for later that day and an ENT appt for the 16th.
The GP said both ears didn't appear to have any fluid, but seemed concern about my anxiety and the fact that I tend to clench my jaw a lot. So prescribed me Metoprolol for my anxiety and blood pressure (which has been high despite dieting and exercising - it's hereditary) as well as Cyclobenzaprine as needed to help with jaw clenching at night, which has helped with the dull jaw pain in the morning, but I'm trying not to take it everyday since you can build up a tolerance pretty easily.

The tests with the ENT on the 16th showed little-to-no hearing loss, but that there was a slight negative pressure in my right ear. Not enough to concern her though. Didn't prescribe anything but recommended a TMD appt for my jaw. Which is scheduled for Feb 8th.

Today is Jan 29th and I haven't really had any improvement as far as my tinnitus goes. There isn't much of anything I can mask it with. It occasionally makes me feel slightly dizzy or light headed, but that could also be in part by the Metoprolol and stress/lack of sleep involved with all of this.
I've had lots of ups and downs during this time; depression, suicidal thoughts, hopelessness, etc... I have a hard time falling asleep most nights. I've gone from having a potentially unhealthy fear of death to thinking it might not be so bad.
My wife deserves so much more out of me than I've been capable of since this spiked. I have mental break downs a few times a week, I get frustrated so much easier and with stupid things.

It's hard for me to recall things super clearly, but I think my tinnitus has been fluctuating a lot more lately. It'll seem to be quieter for a few minutes, or it'll get louder in one ear or the other, or the hissing will seem quieter but the rumbling will be louder. It really seems to be random.
Sometimes when I lay down on my side while trying to sleep, the exposed side will get louder. Then sometimes the one that is muffled with a pillow or something will get louder.
Sometimes it can just get louder from stress or something unknown.

I'm currently taking the Metoprolol daily, only occasionally taking the cyclobenzaprine (muscle relaxer), melatonin supplements nightly, and Omega-3 and Magnesium daily for the last 4 days.
I took the omega-3 and magnesium for two days (Jan 14th & 15th) and stopped because I had a very bad night trying to sleep on the 15th. But then the 20th and 21st the tinnitus didn't really bug me on the weekend much. So maybe it was just chance, maybe it took those supplements almost a week to make any difference. So I figured I'd give them another shot.

I'm wondering if any has some thoughts on any of this. What might be the cause, things I should try, things I should avoid. Do you think it was caused by a fluid buildup, or even by the Debrox or bulb flush? The ENT basically told me not to worry and that it would "probably go away in a few weeks or even months", but it didn't really feel like she was listening to me. This Friday will be 4 weeks.
Anything would truly be appreciate. I'm at my wit's end.

Again, I've gone through all of this BS when I was a teenager and managed to get used to it, but I was at least able to mask it with music or fans then. I haven't been able to mask this with anything. I've barely found any joy in my hobbies or being around other people, friends, or family, since this happened.
I want to get my life back to normal; if not for me, then for my wife.

Thank you.
And sorry for the extensive essay.