Wellbeing and Happiness (Please Post How You Maintain Your Wellbeing and Happiness)

This exercise is really helping me change my negative feelings to positive feelings, and has had a profound positive impact on my life:

I write three lists: 1. My negative feelings and their causes, 2. A more realistic/holistic perspective of the issues, then 3. I try to write several things I am grateful for that could be related to the experience, or not (i.e. I am learning to manage my own feelings which is giving me more freedom and control over my well being and life.) Then I tear up the first list and throw it away, and get up and do something I enjoy right after the exercise. You might have to do this several times a day when you begin, but soon it will train you to be happier regardless of whatever outside circumstances that occur.

I have been able to increase my productivity and have been consistently much happier practicing this exercise, as well as practicing forgiveness of others and myself, because I used to unconsciously ruminate over my negative feelings and this helps train me to regulate my emotional response to outside circumstances. I am now more confident and positive generally, so it helps me achieve my other goals in life, as it is easier to notice and act upon new opportunities when you are in a positive mind space.

Please share how you enjoy the good things in life, and things that work for you.

 

I do a 7-minute workout every morning (I use a phone app but it's the same as http://7-min.com/). Then I have some tart cherry juice, then I do 10 minutes of mindfulness meditation.

I try to go to my gym to use the sauna & jacuzzi at least twice a week.

 

I firmly believe that the best way to add meaning to your life is to make a difference in the life of somebody less fortunate than yourself. No matter where I am in the world, no matter what I am doing, no matter how I might be feeling ... I make a concerted effort to at least once a week make a difference in the life of somebody less fortunate than I. For me, there can be no greater joy.

In another thread I posted that life will never be the same after tinnitus. It can be better if you work at making it better. But it will never be the same.

One way to make your life better is through the performance of acts of lovingkindness such as I described above.

 

Because of allergies (it's a typical windy spring in New Mexico) I had one of my nasty sinus headaches today. I lay around increasingly feeling sorry for myself : scared and angry. I haven't gone to the gym or for a walk in several days. I've let my meditation practice lag. And guess what - the tinnitus seems like a big tragedy to me. I'm so glad I came onto this forum and this thread to get me out of the pity party.

My well-being is definitely helped by exercise and meditation. But what Dr. Nagler says about helping others is the ultimate advice. After all, focusing on myself and my problems is a direct line to the tinnitus. I needed to be reminded of that. The trick for me is not to seek out people to help in order to not hear the tinnitus! There are times when everything I do is about the sounds in my ear.

But here's my own proof that my suffering is a lot about perception and focus: I've had tinnitus for decades - maybe 40 years or more. It's only been in the last few months that it's become an obsessive bother. I know that in past years I would tell people, "Yeah, I have tinnitus," with a kind of shrug, like it was nothing. I hardly ever noticed it. Maybe it's spiked some due to hearing loss, but I know that I've lived without giving it a second thought for most of my life. I'm my own proof that I can (because I have) done it.

It helps for me to stop telling myself stories about how pitiful my condition is; how unacceptable this whistling is; how understandable it would be for me to go crazy.

Staying positive to me does not mean expecting to be free of trouble, bad days, loss, etc. Paradoxically, when I stop expecting a cure for all my problems, or some person or procedure or drug to rescue me, I can be more positive about life.

Counter-intuitively, just sitting in meditation, not trying to do anything or find a cure is a core help. One reason I haven't engaged with this forum regularly is because I can get desperately interested in cures and then notice the tinnitus much more. But threads like this are a very big help and I thank those of you who give real hope with human wisdom and compassion.