Hello, first of all thank you for this place where I can tell my story and maybe even find some help or ideas too. I started with T when I was 18 and for no reason that I could figure, suddenly started with the high pitched ringing that just wouldn't disappear. I was distressed and scared stiff. The fear was awful and I remember banging my head against the wall in frustration. To cut that particular long story short I gradually habituated and went on to live a pretty normal life and found that I could be generally happy and eventually didn't even notice the ringing so much so that I could forget about it for weeks/months/years at a time unless I was in a very quiet place. Even then it didn't bother me, I would just ignore it. I'm now 47 but I feel I have done a very silly and regretable thing. I'm wondering how many of you may have experience of this and how you coped. Recently, a friend chatted to me about her friend who is currently in the throes of T and is finding life hard. Listening to his story brought back painful memories for me thinking about those traumatic early days. I thought I'd listen in to see if my T was still there and guess what it was. Not only that but it suddenly pinged even louder as if to say 'hello, here I am. Still here!!!'. Feel like I've regressed about 25 years and feeling sad and even angry with myself. To make matters worse I've even become a bit obsessed, ploughing through the internet looking at all the latest research etc which I have not done for years. I know this isn't helping but I can't seem to stop! I find myself 'listening in' which I know isn't going to help (again, I can't seem to stop myself) and sleeping is already affected. In fact, last night was awful and I'm already dreading tonight. Is this a 'spike' and if so how do I start to deal with it again.? Thank you for any thought/ideas/support in advance. I'm feeling foolish but also very down.