I Don't Even Remember the Last Time I Heard Complete Silence

I wonder what it feels like to hear silence. I also remember that one night I heard the sound that I don't know how to express about it in my ears, I don't remember exactly, but it sounds like a tinnitus and I ignored it 'cause it was normal to hear it in silence.

And a question pops up in my mind now: do people really hear a complete silence? I think it depends on a person's development and the structure they are built. I don't think I hear a complete silence when I didn't have tinnitus.

When I asked my friends about it, like what they hear in a quiet room or in silence, they answered different questions.

Some said they didn't hear anything. Some said they heard a ringing and another sound that can't be interpreted. Some even said that ringing in the ears was normal to them and they heard it since their childhood.

Any thoughts?

 

Yea before tinnitus in a silent room if I relaxed (another quality removed by tinnitus) I could hear a DEEEEEEE kinda notice, it isn't tinnitus, I used too describe it as the sound of silence, I could make it as loud as I wanted really and if anything broke the silence it would be gone.

I think it's the noise generated by the central nervous system. It was a calm noise. Not like the intrusive ringing pinging sounds I get with noise induced nerve damage tinnitus.

 

Imagine eating a bologna sandwich every day for a year. Eventually, your brain (and tastebuds) stop processing it and you just do it out of force of habit. IMHO, the same idea applies to tinnitus; your brain tires of it and says "no big deal" and just dismisses it as a threat.

 

7 months in now and worse every month.

 

Isn't that sort of like the opposite of "mindfulness"?

A Zen practitioner who makes the same Oolong tea everyday in a ritualistic way, never stops smelling the smells and tasting the taste of the tea. In fact he becomes more attuned to the nuances of it each day. Noticing the fine details as his current crop of tea ages, perhaps adjusting the temperature of the water accordingly. He notices how crops differ year to year, different soils, different altitudes, different weather conditions. He notices not only the nuances of the tea, but the tea becomes a modality for him to notice the nuances of himself. How it tastes in the morning, or the evening, when he is tired, when he is thirsty. How it pairs with foods etc.

Obviously one could have this relationship with their T, and it would be viewed as unhealthy? But some do take this approach and they feel it helps them manage their condition, as they learn what spikes their T (This is the sort of approach that Julian Cowan Hill guy on youtube seems to teach).

I could easily see successfully habituating to a constant T tone(s) that can be masked, but how do you habituate to reactive T, and distorted hearing? Hearing resonance over the sounds you hear externally. It is not as predictable as a bolgna sandwich, its like some days you have a bologna sandwich with sriracha sauce, the next day you have a bologna sandwich with sand and bleach. Additionally you see and smell bologna everywhere you go, and nobody else does.

 

My T is quite loud but two weeks ago after I had a very good time with my friends I literally had to plug my ears to hear my T. For an hour it felt like I could hear silence again for the first time in 8 months. I am still wondering why my T was so low in volume then. Unfortunately but as expected my T came back after a couple of hours.

Fully agree. When I first had T it was a very constant tone. I'd say with moderate volume (I could hear it while driving but some music would mask it) and I honestly didn't give a shit about this T. But it spiked and became reactive a month ago and that's just very difficult to cope with. It's also more a hissing sound now instead of a constant tone which is very hard to mask. Fortunately the reactivity seems to go down lately.

 

What were you doing with your friends?

 

We went ice karting so it's not that this activity somehow could impact my auditory system. Anyway I really love go karting and I won so maybe my mood at that moment had a real (tangible) impact on my T. I don't know but it was very weird..