Hey
@Aussie Lea ---
I have found mine fluctuates depending on how much sleep I've had, my caffine intake, my stress level, and other factors. I do think that sometimes it's my perception of it, but I'm a musician/producer/teacher so I am trained to listen. So I am in very close touch with how my T is feeling though the environment can change it. Say if you're at the beach or when I visited someone in the hospital i couldn't hear it over all the medical gear buzzing away. I try to not run from it but I know that I do. I had an awful day Sunday when I was on a walk in nature with my my girlfriend and I suddenly had a spike. I broke down but went home and used some of my coping mechanisms to calm down. Some of which I would say are helpful but some of which aren't. I definitely am considering going to CBT with the right therapist. Have you seen and ENT or Psychiatrist about this? It sounds to me like T has seriously disrupted your life and you should probably talk to a specialist. Yes it was hard to teach once I noticed I could hear it a bit in my lesson rooms or with ear plugs in. But, I feel it would be lower to have to move back in with my parents. But I am know now that I will find a new profession. I will still perform as much as I can and teach a few students. But I don't want to have expose my ears any more to loud sound. You are not a wimp, and you can get through this. We can. It won't be easy. But if Dr. Nagler, Dr. Hubbard, and many, many, others can make it through loud T, then there's no reason why we can't. I can't see into your friends heads so I don't know how they're coping with it. As far as medications go you, you might want to look into it with a doctor so you can live your life. My heart and ears go out to you more then your know.
Hey Soul station, thanks for your very caring response. You know how easily offended us T people can get, if we think we are being attacked or made to feel like everyone else is doing better.
I have seen every health care practioner round. Saw a Psychiatrist, tried 3 different antidepressants only for 3 days at a time, they made me feel totally out of it, depersonalised, more than the T does, and very nauseous, and sedated. Hated them. Im not depressed, l have an adjustment disorder to Tinnitus, which has caused me to have high anxiety levels. Did not have anxiety prior to T. Manipulated Psych to give me Ativan ( Lexapro) benzodiazepine. lm taking fairly small dose's .25mg, sometimes 1 for 2 days straight, then try to have a few days off. If lm having a bad day l'l take .5mg, and it does make a big difference to my coping. l have never exceeded 1.5mg in a week total. l have nursed many people with benzo addiction's so l know how quickly they stop working and you get tolerance. But l needed some quality of life. lve nursed lots of people in Psychiatry who have tinnitus & they have been on huge doses. Also l will eventually run out & my GP will not prescribe them. So my plan is l may need to take the Lorazepam to return to work & once lm coping with that l'l wean myself off them. Hope this works, l think this will help me habituate better, l have been taking these only for last 4 weeks. Prior to that l took nothing but l could barely function. l have doing neuronomics for 6 months, still supposed to be doing it, only do it now when overwhelmed, should be using it everyday as per protocol, but the classical music annoys the crap out of me, and you get so sick of listening to those same 4 tracks. l dont know if it really helped me that much, probably did in the beginning. l had 1 session with a TRT counsellor & numerous phone conversations with my local Tinnitus line, they dont seem overly convinced about Neuromonics??? re not much counselling with it, its cost, but it does come with a lovely book explaining the neurophysiological model. My audiologist is not trained in TRT as such & saids l know more about this disorder than he does & not is not a good thing, i.e. too much reading.
I have to cope, l am a single mother, l am living with my ex partner until he decides to kick me out. So
l have to get control. Saw an ENT bad move that was, he said " l can see why your crying, most people with this kill themselves" Really made my limbic system go into overdrive. But we all know now that is not true & people with Tinnitus have no higher rate of suicide than anyone else, but l had to keep telling myself that for sometime. Think l had a PTSD reaction to ENT at that time. You would'nt send your dog for treatment from that ENT. l used to run CBT groups at work so you would think l could help myself. My plan is to stop getting on this forum. Distract myself. Continue on with my hypnotherapist. Take the Ativan when l need it. And go back to work and deal with my reaction. No one can do this for us can they. I do believe there is different levels of severity/ volume with this. Even though my audiologist saids everyones is the same, its just our perception to it, as you can tell by how people describe it and how easily they can mask it. But l do have good days now, so its time to get on with it.
l wish you the very best life you can have.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to reply also its very much appreciated, warm regards.