Looking for Hope

I’m a 57 year old guy who’s never really “beat on” my ears, although I never paid close attention to my hearing either. I ride a motorcycle, and I know the dangers that can present, so for some years now, I usually wore foam ear plugs on long trips, especially on the highway. They made a big difference. It’s never been the engine noise that bothered me, it was always the wind going by my ears that was the loudest part of riding. I occasionally wore headphones with loud music at the beach but that was never for really long times.

Anyway, I guess it was long enough.

A little over a month ago I noticed a “slight buzz” in the background with my right ear only, and was seen by a reputable ENT. When she had my hearing tested, she determined that I had some slight hearing loss at the very highest frequencies, well above conversation. She’s attributed that to age, and told me that my tinnitus is more age related, than it is to any trauma or abuse. Apparently, hearing loss from trauma has a different profile than my hearing loss. For the record, I don’t notice any loss in hearing.

I’m pretty freaked out. I do OK during the day, where I can deal with the slight background noise. At night, and especially when I lie down, sometimes it sounds like a siren is going off next to me. I find I can take an antihistamine at bed time and I don’t hear a thing, (my antihistamines aren’t the drowsy kind). I’m just starting experimenting with some background noise while I sleep. I’ll try my Bluetooth headphones with some white noise running and see how that goes.

I understand that sometimes this goes away, but if it doesn’t, I need to adapt to this “new normal”. I get a lot of comfort from reading your posts, and I try to remind myself that while this “just plain sucks”, I’d trade a host of other diseases and conditions for tinnitus in a second. It’s also a big help to know I’m not the only one.

I realize it takes time to get used to this, so I’m trying to be patient. From your posts, you folks sound like you’ve become accustomed to it, and sound a lot better about it than I must sound.

What I really need right now, what I’m coming up short on, is HOPE.

 

Welcome Don. HOPE is what you will find on TT. Many TT members get better over time and after receiving support from kind members. I am like you with hearing loss in the highest frequency. Almost every time I wake up my central nervous system is going through the awakening response to remind me that I am missing those ultra high frequencies. My T is an ultra high pitch dog whistle packed with so much energy that I could hear it above the jet noise in the last 2 flights I took, and above the roaring of the raging rapids in the salmon rivers I fish. A few years back, this T hit me out of the blue one night and I shot out of bed covering my ears in agony. Didn't know what hit me and why? But I guess aging plus some exposure to a faulty smoke alarm (a month prior) might have caused it.

It is not a T normal people can bear. Sometimes normal rain sound is not enough to mask my T. I have to use squeaky faucet sound plus some blue or violet noise. Then severe hyperacusis soon joined in the misery. H made all sounds so piercingly hurtful that even the soft voice of my wife hurt. If I use ear plugs to block outside sounds for H, then the T scream became so unbearably dominant. So T & H are mutually exclusive. Gosh!!! I tried to choose a less choice of the two devils but there is no lesser choice between them. T & H turned me into a mess with constant panic attacks a few years back. I never thought I could become well again. But you never rule out what time and patience plus some positive attitude can do to heal. Today I live an absolutely enjoyable and productive life.

So never believe the lies of the T bully. T is not an end game. If a panic prone person like me can recover after some time, have hope you can too. I am not alone as many members get better & write their success stories too. Try to read up the success stories to give you hope. I wrote my success story and listed many important points which have helped me turn around. For brevity I post this link hopefully you have time to read it. Take care and hopefully things will improve for you. God bless.

https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/from-darkness-to-light-how-i-recovered-from-tinnitus-hyperacusis.3148/