My Partner Has Terrible Tinnitus

Discussion in 'Support' started by JoyceyM, May 30, 2016.

    1. JoyceyM

      JoyceyM Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      I dont have it my partner does
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      no idea
      Can someone out there help please, I don't have tinnitus but my partner has it so bad he sometimes goes quiet and does not want to speak or do anything. Music sometimes helps but not always.
      If I ask what is wrong he says its the noise and the pain. But often he just goes into himself, this is so very difficult to live with and I just want some idea of what to do. He wont talk about it just goes quiet
       
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    2. Fangen
      Moonlighting

      Fangen Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Stockholm, Sweden
      Tinnitus Since:
      December 2nd, 2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic trauma (loud concert for 1h)
      Hi Joycey!

      I can do that sometimes too, that I just want some alone time to deal with my anxiety. Often it just takes 15-20 min to just handle my feelings. My therapist say that it can be a good thing (at least for me) to do that since I usually feel much better afterwards. If I cannot take that break, it will often just prolong the anxiety. So I would recommend to not say too much when your partner draws away for a while, just support him and say that you're there for him. Of course, this depends on how often he does that and how long. If it is everyday and for long periods (like 1 hour or more etc) then maybe you should talk to him and try to understand why he does that so often and ask him to see a professional so he can try to work out with himself how to handle T. It can be very hard to do it on your own sometimes. :)
       
    3. undecided
      Breezy

      undecided Member

      Location:
      Greece
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown.
      The 'going quiet and not doing anything' behavior show a textbook case of a depressed person.
      It's almost instinctive for all animals, when they are hurt, anxious, helpless to shut themselves off, so to say...
      @Fangen 's advice is right on the spot. Your partner might need more than your support - maybe it's time for some professional assistance.
       
    4. Simon_C

      Simon_C Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2006
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Operation to remove growth in ear
      I joined the forum to try and get help for my partner. Since having an ear operation in 2006 to remove benign tumors he lost hearing, had nerve damage and lost taste and has since had permanent tinnitus. It has been recorded off the charts with Audiologists.

      I need to get some advice as to what to do as he gets very depressed, doesn’t enjoy being out now as he cannot hear in loud places or restaurants, has permanent screaming in his ear. He was looking at a cochlear implant and tried that for a while but it didn’t really help.

      I just want some advice as to what to do and what could possibly help the situation. I realize there is no cure but anything to help him manage the tinnitus and all the side effects that go with it would be a great start. I hate seeing him so down and depressed, it comes in waves when I think it gets too much to bear and is heartbreaking to see.

      Any help or advice would really be appreciated. Thanks, Simon.
       
    5. GregCA
      Jaded

      GregCA Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Otosclerosis
      You mean that he was implanted? What happened after activation?
      Is his other ear fully functional?
       
    6. Jcb
      No Mood

      Jcb Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      December 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      possible TMJ, came on after severe cold and chest infection,
      I’m sorry to hear that he has Tinnitus. There’s plenty of threads and people on here that will be able to give you some advice. I’ve only had tinnitus for 4 months and it’s been hell.

      Has he been to see a doctor over his depression/anxiety? Does he sleep with any sounds in the background there’s plenty of apps that will play nice soothing sounds or different colour noises that may help him sleep a bit better. Apparently you are only meant to play the sounds just below his tinnitus volume as this will help the brain concentrate on whatever sound your playing instead of the Tinnitus.
      Does he like to go walking? Maybe try some sports together or get a hobby that isn’t too loud, staying active and exercising will help improve his mood (won’t cure it but certainly can help)

      It’s hard to explain just how much this can affect you emotionally and physically. Having a good support system will help him, which you coming on here shows he has.
       
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