New Guy Here

Hi,

My name is John and I have had tinnitus for the past couple of months. I just went to an ENT today and was told basically to live with it. It was a devastating comment to receive and I am still reeling from it. I had done the research and found that it is mostly permanent, but I had hoped for something. Anything. I'm 50 and it appears that my tinnitus is due to a combination of age related hearing loss and a loud work environment. The doctor told me that it might go away in a few months or years, but I think she was just trying to make me feel better. I am just so disappointed and heart broken over it. I really don't like living like this, but what else can I do? I'm just lost.

Hopefully, I can learn how to cope with it better. I already have the white noise generator (nature sounds) in my phone to help me fall asleep. I tried the lipoflavonoid stuff for the last month but it hasn't worked.

I'm just really having a hard time accepting this and I don't know what else to do...

thanks for reading,

 

Hey John

Welcome. We all share in this experience and you are among friends. The part that you are in is the toughest when it is new and your body, ears and brain are all wacked out. You are doing the correct things right now and because it is new there is still a chance it will go away. However, even if it doesn't, it will get better. Your brain and body will adjust, make new connects, change and adapt and so you will you. In the meantime, do what you can to get sleep (though it may be difficult for a bit), don't live in fear, get support here on Tinnitus Talk and know that each day even if it doesn't seem like it at first, things are getting better for you.

 

Thank you, I'm just devastated over it.

 

ENT... we feel sorry for their mental disability. They are basically "without science" and not even know give some comfort. I'm sure that soon you will wake up without tinnitus! Do not worry, as they have come, in the same way will go away!
Best wishes!

 

Erik is right...it may not seem like it but everyday brings you closer to recovery. I absolutely did not believe that I would ever have a normal life again...but I do. It took time and learning not to fear/hate the tinnitus. Acceptance and habituation will happen over time. There are things you can do to facilitate habituation. Personally, I went for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy that helped me learn how to restructure my thinking, accept my situation and taught me how to use exposure to get used to the noise--this diminishes the fear associated with the noise. I also took a workshop to relieve my anxiety-but I was prone to anxiety before my onset of tinnitus. Tinnitus pushed me over the edge into panic attacks. Relaxation and deep breathing exercises can really help--along with the sound enrichment you are already using. I take Xanax but I have been using it less lately. It was very helpful to me--especially for getting a good night's sleep. I am not advocating the use of meds--I am just sharing my experience.

My first ENT told me that it goes away 50% of the time. I don't know if that's true in some cases but I am in my 15th month so for me it's not likely--although who really knows. Please believe me that it will get better. Life will be good again, it just takes time and some strategy.

 

Hello John,

I understand you are feeling lost. My ENT also said that it might go away in a few months, and I am sure he was just trying to make me feel better and give me hope. But that hope was killing me, because every time when I had a low T-day or even a quiet day, I thought "Yes, now it's over, the tinnitus is gone"... But then I woke up and every morning it was back....

Now I have T for 8 months, started May 3th. I am very sad to live with this, because I always loved silence so much.
I've been in tears for so long, and I thought to live with this is no living at all... I was in panic and fear for a very long time. Did use white noise for half a year (and still some times I need it). I was also heart broken,... to think... to have this for life...

But last two weeks I feel a bit better. The T is not gone and stille the same. SSSSSHH and EEEEEE and TTH TTH TTH (kind of electricity / morse-code). But what has been changed is the fear. I don't have fear anymore, and that is a big difference. Now the sounds in my head are very annoying and irritating and also very tiring, but the fear is gone and that makes me a bit calmer.

Please realise that the brain can not think positive about the future on this moment when you are feeling negative and lost. You only can think about the future in the way you are feeling NOW. So NOW you feel not OK, and so you only can imagine the future is also not OK.

I had suicide thoughts, I was alive but not living anymore. But two weeks or so ago, there was this day, the first day since the onset, that I felt a better a bit and was looking forward to the brand new day....

I am still very sad I have to live with those sounds in my head, I miss the silence so much. But I want to live, and I want to go further on, believing in habituation. Thank God I do have one quiet day a week, sometimes two. Very graceful for that. It's also very special, don't know why I am 'lucky' to have quiet days now and then....

Maybe your T will go away, then your ENT has spoken the right words...
Hang on, and try to have faith that you will feel better with it.... T is all about TIME..... the sounds are new to your brains and it need time to get used to it. Also T is about FEAR,... when you managed to stop having anxiety, fear and panic then you are on the right way...

Wish you all the best.

Gabriëlle

 

John, from one Hoosier (I grew up in Perry County) to another, Welcome to T Talk. I've suffered from tinnitus since April of 1972. Initially it resulted from being in close proximity to an explosion while I was in the Army. And then recurring exposure to loud noise environments in service until the end of 1976. Then working for an electrical utility for almost 30 years, I was continually exposed to noisy environments. For me, my tinnitus started to improve after my accompanying hearing loss increased until I started wearing hearing aids. For me, that was a definite breakthrough. I still have occasional bouts with tinnitus but it is now so mild and infrequent that I hardly notice it. There is hope, you do adjust, but it can feel quite maddening at first.

Hang in there Hoosier.

Albert

 

Excellent advise from prior posters. We have been where you are. Not many coming here for support could escape the initial sufferings because T is so alien to many of us. I had ultra high pitch dog whistle T packed with so much condense energy and it resonates in my whole head. Then severe hyperacusis followed to add much more misery as it T sufferings were not enough. It turned all normal sounds glassy and piercingly hurtful to my ears. I had to wear earplugs to protect from even normal sounds, but the plugs blocked all masking sounds outside, leaving the harsh T so unbearably dominant. T & H are mutually exclusive. Protect from this I am dead with that, protect from that I am dead with this. Then they turned on the flood gate of hell of relentless anxiety and panic attacks on auto mode, being that I suffered from these disorders for years before T & H. The daily sufferings were overwhelming me and I thought I would never recover from such unlivable conditions. But today I am back living a normal and enjoyable life. Never say never. Give it time. People do get better and write their success stories. Hope you read over them to give you some hope and confidence that you can be on the other side too. There are many things you can do to help yourself and many of these approaches mentioned in the success stories can collectively help any one who is willing to adapt and adjust. Take good care.

 

Welcome, John. We all feel your pain.
Agree with Erik. It is new and has a fair chance of going away on its own.
Hope. Please be strong. And we'll be praying for you.

 

"I really don't like living like this, but what else can I do? I'm just lost.
Hopefully, I can learn how to cope with it better. I'm just really having a hard time accepting this and I don't know what else to do..." (quoting from OP's initial post)

Most of the time for a new T sufferer, it is hard to accept the T reality and its sufferings. But do remember one thing - acceptance takes time. Your reaction to T now may not be the same given some time. Don't project your future based on your current condition. If you read enough success story, for those who have recovered while their T stays the same, you will discover one common theme - T may not change but people's perception of T can change over time for the better which allows them to habituate to T. So keep this in mind. Don't believe in the many distorted, catastrophic thoughts about the future. Let the future be the future. It is not a reality yet and it may not as bad as you project based on current condition.