So Much Noise During Family Visits

Discussion in 'Support' started by Bambi, Apr 6, 2015.

tinnitus forum
    1. Bambi

      Bambi Member

      Location:
      Norway
      Tinnitus Since:
      08/2009
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Hello

      After having family visiting during the easter-holiday, a question has come to mind;

      Why is the childrens need to scream and holler more important than the health of a family member?

      The family visiting has two small children, aged 4 and 7. The soundlevel inside the house the 10 days they were here, were extreme. From 07:00 in the morning, to 07:00 at night; 12 hours with non-stop hollering, screething, screaming, you name it. I could not use my hearing aids, all the sound made my ears ache so much I had to take pain-medication. So with tinnitus screaming louder than ever in my ears, I heard nothing people said to me either. How do you explain to people you can´t hear what are saying that the general soundlevel is to loud? Four of the 10 days I´ve spent laying in bed - with a sound-generator blasting, trying to get some rest from the children.

      So, what do you think? Is it ok to inflict so much sound on a person suffering from tinnitus, who generally can´t be in loud surroundings on beforehand? A person who´s crippled by the tinnitus in everyday life? Is it ok that the sufferer is the only person trying to talk to the children, telling them to be little bit quieter? Is it ok to tell this person "your aunt has had the same thing for 20 years, she´s ok"?

      I´m sorry about the rant.... No matter what I say, the chorus goes "they´re children, they make noise"

      Also, sorry about the bad english.
       
      • Hug Hug x 1
    2. linearb
      Psychedelic

      linearb Member Hall of Fame

      Location:
      East Coast USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      1998
      This sounds very difficult and I'm sorry you have to deal with it.

      I think that the bottom line, unfortunately, is that little kids do make a ton of noise. There are personal and cultural factors, but, kids scream and laugh and cry. I remember reading an informal study which came to the conclusion that pediatricians actually have higher rates of hearing damage than other doctors, because they spend so much time around small children. Obviously kids should be taught to behave and not be crazy all the time, but I think that being able to run around and laugh and scream and be a little bonkers is a normal and healthy part of growing up.

      I would like to have children over the next few years, and I am already assuming that earplugs will be involved a lot of the time...
       
    3. Rina
      Energetic

      Rina Member

      Location:
      florida, USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/18/2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Really don't know
      I have 2 little ones and sometimes I want to run away.. But I can't... Just wear earplugs bext time they are around
       
    4. Bambi

      Bambi Member

      Location:
      Norway
      Tinnitus Since:
      08/2009
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Thank you both for your answers :eek:)

      One thing is completely clear - I will never have children. I just can not deal with all the noise they generate. I think what is the most frustrating, is that the parent of before mentioned kids, don´t say anything to them. Of course I understand that children make noise, but O M G .... A 7 year old kid should understand if his mother says "please be little bit more quiet, your auntie´s ears hurt". One thing is that he´ll during play will forget, but then you can tell him again.

      To illustrate; When standing outside the house (50 meters away), all doors and windows closed, you can clearly hear all the screaming....


      Thanks for letting me rant :eek:)
       
    5. Bambi

      Bambi Member

      Location:
      Norway
      Tinnitus Since:
      08/2009
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I do not know why I posted :eek:)

      I meant; :)
       
    6. @Bambi I can certainly relate to what you are saying. I, too, don't understand why people let their children scream. It used to be that if a child was screaming, it was because he/she was in danger. It is now just an ordinary way of being, and people seem to just ignore the screaming.

      Children's screaming really hurts my ears because of my hyperacusis. I live on an island, and I have to take a ferry to go to the mainland. The ferries are always full of screaming children, so I just wait in the car.

      When I grew up, children were not allowed to scream as they are now. They were taught to be quiet and polite to those around them. Maybe it is because children don't seem to play outside like they used too. My husband always told our daughter, " if you are going to scream, you are going to have to go outside to do it." She would quit, because it was Alaska and 40 degrees below zero!

      Children will make noise, and it a healthy part of growing up, but people don't need to take up more than their share of space. I feel for you! :eek:
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
    7. Gabrielle
      No Mood

      Gabrielle Member

      Location:
      Netherlands, Utrecht
      Tinnitus Since:
      05/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown, maybe bad syringing
      You better quit family-visits. Maybe they will not understand, but they don't know what it's like to have T and/or H.
      The screaming of children is awful and painful for us who have T and/or H.
       
    8. linearb
      Psychedelic

      linearb Member Hall of Fame

      Location:
      East Coast USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      1998
      I think earplugs are a better option that withdrawing from society. Children are a normal part of society.

      I do think things have changed a lot, but I definitely remember doing my fair share of running around screaming when I was a little kid. I grew up in the country, with a big house and lots of woods -- that helps a lot.
       

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