- Sep 4, 2016
- 2
- Tinnitus Since
- 2016
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Loud Concert, Sans Earplugs
I remember hearing a story on NPR about tinnitus and thinking to myself, "My god, that would drive me to suicide."
Irony is a bitch.
Fast forward a few years and one overly loud concert and my personal perception of "silence" has blossomed into a full and rich ~6k tone in my left ear and a similar but sometimes-fluctuating ~8k tone in my right. Prominent enough to be heard in a quiet office, and consistent enough to ensure that I'll never sleep again without assistance.
A trip to the ENT gave the same results that many others have experienced. A little wax removed. Hearing test administered and ok results up the 8khz limit of their test. Platitudes about "it'll go away on it's own", "it's just a temporary threshold shift", etc. A vow that no medicines or supplements will have any effect. When I pressed and asked about an oral steroid since I was still in the acute phase, I was told that that was a ridiculous prospect and that nothing can help but time.
The sheer dismissiveness of the doctor and the matter of fact nature of his "this is either temporary or it's permanent and there is nothing anyone can do to help", "the damage is done" response really put me in a negative mindset. "Oh, and here, have a pamphlet about our group therapy on managing chronic tinnitus."
Gee, thanks... Shit.
Masking works most of the time. Plugs make the tones seem louder but also allow me to "attune" to the sound which seems to give me some relief for short periods. Skull thumping also gives me a few moments of adjusted freedom.
Sleep is the hardest part. I've always been a night owl bordering on insomniac, but now when I try to sleep I simply just can't. A fan in my face is too low of a frequency to mask anything and headphones are out because I sleep on my side.
In fact the biggest issue is that with one ear is buried in a pillow, I get a nice clean tone from it that seems to sear itself into my brain. I can see how one could truly be driven mad by this condition. It might not even take that long.
Melatonin might be the thing that keeps me sane, as 5-6mg seems to knock me out and keep me asleep for 8-ish hours before my alarm goes--- actually no that's just my brain saying "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" (translation: Good Morning!).
I'm sure I have it better than many of the members and readers of this board, but selfishly, that provides little solace. The worst level of hell is the one you occupy yourself.
Irony is a bitch.
Fast forward a few years and one overly loud concert and my personal perception of "silence" has blossomed into a full and rich ~6k tone in my left ear and a similar but sometimes-fluctuating ~8k tone in my right. Prominent enough to be heard in a quiet office, and consistent enough to ensure that I'll never sleep again without assistance.
A trip to the ENT gave the same results that many others have experienced. A little wax removed. Hearing test administered and ok results up the 8khz limit of their test. Platitudes about "it'll go away on it's own", "it's just a temporary threshold shift", etc. A vow that no medicines or supplements will have any effect. When I pressed and asked about an oral steroid since I was still in the acute phase, I was told that that was a ridiculous prospect and that nothing can help but time.
The sheer dismissiveness of the doctor and the matter of fact nature of his "this is either temporary or it's permanent and there is nothing anyone can do to help", "the damage is done" response really put me in a negative mindset. "Oh, and here, have a pamphlet about our group therapy on managing chronic tinnitus."
Gee, thanks... Shit.
Masking works most of the time. Plugs make the tones seem louder but also allow me to "attune" to the sound which seems to give me some relief for short periods. Skull thumping also gives me a few moments of adjusted freedom.
Sleep is the hardest part. I've always been a night owl bordering on insomniac, but now when I try to sleep I simply just can't. A fan in my face is too low of a frequency to mask anything and headphones are out because I sleep on my side.
In fact the biggest issue is that with one ear is buried in a pillow, I get a nice clean tone from it that seems to sear itself into my brain. I can see how one could truly be driven mad by this condition. It might not even take that long.
Melatonin might be the thing that keeps me sane, as 5-6mg seems to knock me out and keep me asleep for 8-ish hours before my alarm goes--- actually no that's just my brain saying "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" (translation: Good Morning!).
I'm sure I have it better than many of the members and readers of this board, but selfishly, that provides little solace. The worst level of hell is the one you occupy yourself.
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