MemberTinnitus is a monumental challenge.
That information can not be overstated.
Everybody with loud, chronic, intrusive Tinnitus knows the truth of that statement
......BUT NOBODY ELSE DOES !!
They truly do not have a clue.
I went to a family birthday party held in a public hall, where the crappy, mindless 'music' was blaring out.
I said nothing, but quietly removed myself to an adjacent lounge. The hostess, a future family member came out to speak to me:
"Oh dear?
Out here 'nursing' our Tinnitus, are we ?
Oh dear - what a shame?"
My respect sunk below zero!
(I eventually took the opportunity to point out her CRASS IGNORANCE!)
I remember reading an article written by a son about his ageing dad, who had said to him,
"Do you know son.....when I went blind, it was truly awful. But I gradually came to accept it. Eventually, after many falls in the house, and many bruises, I learnt to find my way around again. I could cope.
Then I got loud permanent Tinnitus!
He'll on earth!
Going blind was like 'a stroll in the park' compared to Tinnitus."
I suffered an isolating neglectful childhood, necessitating years of therapy, but I searched for answers, studied psychology, found some great authors who wrote on "child care, and the growth of love," (principally John Bowlby) and managed to piece together what had gone wrong, and devise a way I could recover from it. In short, I not only survived, I got well.
By means of my 'damage limitation' practice, I went on to have a pretty good life. The most loving of wives, wonderful kids, beautiful grandchildren, a reasonably good business life, and great musical experiences in the jazz world.
Then 'Effing' Tinnitus!!!
(Sorry about the hint at an expletive.)
So what caused it?
*Fifty odd years in the music business, trying hard to advise surrounding musicians against the excessive use of volume, and being studiously ignored.
*A two hour stint in an MRI machine, far too long, to observe heart activity.
*Six months of (ototoxic) prednisolone, following an acute attack of sarcoidosis.
*Finally a high society gig, where I was the bandleader, in the presence of a musician 'friend,' who played far too loudly, and up close, who I was paying £200 to deafen me, and give me Tinnitus.
All this in the presence of the Royal Family.
(Royal Ascot.)
The following day I woke up completely deaf on my left side for 48 hours.
Hearing came back, and with it......severe Tinnitus, which has extended to this day.
I was truly heart broken !!!
Permanent, loud, life changing, head noise.
You all know what this is like, only too well.
After some terrible months, I decided that I did want to go on living a productive life, after all.
But how to do it ??
As we all know, there is no obvious way forward, is there?
Living in a state of permanent anger is no good.
We already have excessive cortisol and adrenalin in our bloodstream, from stress.
So for self preservation, we have to let go of anger.....just let it go....
Become a miserable grouch?
No good either.
Who would want to even know us? Nobody.
I found the posting,
'Habituation is not a Myth, it's an Impossibility' very interesting.
Apparently it can be shown, by observing constant neuronal activity, that the brain always brings our focus back to 'the noise.'
A depressing prospect, which may well be the truth of it, but whether it is true or not, one thing is for sure.....we must devise a way to go forward....better ways to cope.
For me:
Meditation - I can still put myself 'right out,' despite the noise.
Okay - so part of my brain is not at rest perhaps, but much of it clearly is.
Good sleep - with the assistance of a personalised meditational tape.
(courtesy of one's wife.)
Walks in the fresh air, and other exercise.
Oh.....and I nearly forgot, the company of three of the Finest, Most Adorable Pussycats
.....in the known world.
(Blimey - that was so long - I'll let you go now)
That information can not be overstated.
Everybody with loud, chronic, intrusive Tinnitus knows the truth of that statement
......BUT NOBODY ELSE DOES !!
They truly do not have a clue.
I went to a family birthday party held in a public hall, where the crappy, mindless 'music' was blaring out.
I said nothing, but quietly removed myself to an adjacent lounge. The hostess, a future family member came out to speak to me:
"Oh dear?
Out here 'nursing' our Tinnitus, are we ?
Oh dear - what a shame?"
My respect sunk below zero!
(I eventually took the opportunity to point out her CRASS IGNORANCE!)
I remember reading an article written by a son about his ageing dad, who had said to him,
"Do you know son.....when I went blind, it was truly awful. But I gradually came to accept it. Eventually, after many falls in the house, and many bruises, I learnt to find my way around again. I could cope.
Then I got loud permanent Tinnitus!
He'll on earth!
Going blind was like 'a stroll in the park' compared to Tinnitus."
I suffered an isolating neglectful childhood, necessitating years of therapy, but I searched for answers, studied psychology, found some great authors who wrote on "child care, and the growth of love," (principally John Bowlby) and managed to piece together what had gone wrong, and devise a way I could recover from it. In short, I not only survived, I got well.
By means of my 'damage limitation' practice, I went on to have a pretty good life. The most loving of wives, wonderful kids, beautiful grandchildren, a reasonably good business life, and great musical experiences in the jazz world.
Then 'Effing' Tinnitus!!!
(Sorry about the hint at an expletive.)
So what caused it?
*Fifty odd years in the music business, trying hard to advise surrounding musicians against the excessive use of volume, and being studiously ignored.
*A two hour stint in an MRI machine, far too long, to observe heart activity.
*Six months of (ototoxic) prednisolone, following an acute attack of sarcoidosis.
*Finally a high society gig, where I was the bandleader, in the presence of a musician 'friend,' who played far too loudly, and up close, who I was paying £200 to deafen me, and give me Tinnitus.
All this in the presence of the Royal Family.
(Royal Ascot.)
The following day I woke up completely deaf on my left side for 48 hours.
Hearing came back, and with it......severe Tinnitus, which has extended to this day.
I was truly heart broken !!!
Permanent, loud, life changing, head noise.
You all know what this is like, only too well.
After some terrible months, I decided that I did want to go on living a productive life, after all.
But how to do it ??
As we all know, there is no obvious way forward, is there?
Living in a state of permanent anger is no good.
We already have excessive cortisol and adrenalin in our bloodstream, from stress.
So for self preservation, we have to let go of anger.....just let it go....
Become a miserable grouch?
No good either.
Who would want to even know us? Nobody.
I found the posting,
'Habituation is not a Myth, it's an Impossibility' very interesting.
Apparently it can be shown, by observing constant neuronal activity, that the brain always brings our focus back to 'the noise.'
A depressing prospect, which may well be the truth of it, but whether it is true or not, one thing is for sure.....we must devise a way to go forward....better ways to cope.
For me:
Meditation - I can still put myself 'right out,' despite the noise.
Okay - so part of my brain is not at rest perhaps, but much of it clearly is.
Good sleep - with the assistance of a personalised meditational tape.
(courtesy of one's wife.)
Walks in the fresh air, and other exercise.
Oh.....and I nearly forgot, the company of three of the Finest, Most Adorable Pussycats
.....in the known world.
(Blimey - that was so long - I'll let you go now)
