How to Begin to Free Yourself from Anxiety / Tinnitus Associated Anxiety

Discussion in 'Support' started by Natalier, Jun 11, 2017.

    1. Natalier

      Natalier Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      May 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Hello Everyone, I'm new and my name is Natalie. After searching on this board without membership I decided to go ahead and become one and offer my story and how I am dealing.

      Okay, so I've been suffering from anxiety and depression for the last 4 years now so when the tinnitus hit, I knew what the problem was....my reactions towards it, not the noise it's self. That's what being in therapy does for you, and being a very self aware person. So understanding that this was the case I knew I needed to get out my handy techniques to help cope. And I want to share them with you all in hope that it helps you.

      I'll break it down to two categories, thoughts and feelings.

      The thoughts that most of you have had, /and are getting.

      I'll never be the same, How will I live my life?, It will never go away, it's only getting worse, how will I ever be able to enjoy myself again?, I won't ever be able to listen to music, It will get worse in the future, I don't want to live with this forever, what if I end it all, I don't want to die but I can't stop the feelings/thoughts so will have to, I'll never be normal, how will I go on dates etc.

      Again, the problem is not even these thoughts because its normal to feel that way, it's your reaction to the thoughts. You see, the mind is very powerful, but it's also not very known for staying stuck on the same thing for too long. What I mean is the brain won't stay stuck on these thoughts and feelings, and will probably start to give you new worries before it decides to stay stuck on the 'will I ever get better thought'?

      So what do I do? and what should you do when the thought arises?

      Well, you want to not try to push the thought out of you're mind. Because that's the worst thing to do, but if it helps you, so be it. But trying to not think of it is only going to make you think of it. Like the whole example with, "don't think of the elephant" but then you do because you're trying so hard not to think of it. You see, you have to allow the thought to be there first and feel it for a while, like when you taste a ice cream and let it swish around in your mouth before swallowing, but then over time you must replace the thought immediately with something else when it pops up (ex. it will only get worse) - switch to: what am I going to eat for dinner? Then focus on what are you going to eat? go through the lists of food in you're head. Apples, oranges, chicken, salad, tuna, rice, etc. Then go cook. The point of holding the thought there at first is to get use to it as if it were a roommate. You get used to it and let it not have so much power over your mood.

      What do you know you forgot about the thought for a minute. But oh no, the thought is back. That's okay, because you are only beginning to change the way you think so the thought will come back. But I promise you, later down the road, you will get good at it and before you know it, a minute, an hour, a day, a month has passed and you forgot the thought that was troubling you, or you stopped caring about it.

      Another example, It will never go away. switch to: I got to clean my room. Let's see, I have to pick up the socks, I have to fix the bed, take the bottles to the sink, clear out the desk, take the towel back to the bathroom etc. And then begin to actually clean.

      And believe me if this anxiety is troubling you, your room is probably a mess. LOL

      The point of this exercise is to help focus your mind completely on something else so that it forgets what was troubling you. But, you have to make sure you're attention is at least %95 on the task. And if cleaning is not helping, get involved in a task that needs you're attention completely like playing a video game, sorting your papers, playing an instrument etc.

      Okay, so that's how to deal with the thoughts related to the anxiety. Now what about the anxiety it's self?

      Well, anxiety believe it or not can be present without the thoughts. You can literally have no reason for the anxiety attack you just had. So what should you do about it?

      The answer is nothing. You have to feel the anxiety, don't push it away. But.......you have to do whatever it is that you were going to do for that day. Be it, the walk on the beach, the cleaning your room, making dinner, doing your homework, playing with the kids, going to work. Don't and I repeat don't , no matter how bad you feel, stop what you had planned for the day. Don't let it take away what you had planned unless its a full blown panic attack.

      Like I said the mind never stays stuck on one thing for too long, and the anxiety will go. Be it, a minute from now, a hour, a day, etc

      The purpose of this is to work through the feelings, and eventually they will pass. But make sure to: WORK THROUGH THE FEELINGS. You may even notice that you've been so focused on buying the groceries that you forgot about the feelings so you try to remember the feelings and then it comes back, but as I said that's completely okay, because you still have to drive home, or take transportation, or do something that will take your mind off it again. It takes practice but you will achieve It.

      What are the end results for this? You stop focusing on what's troubling you. You begin to take back your power on how you feel from anxiety, from tinnitus, both. A weight on your shoulders will be lifted. You will begin to feel free, even if it lasts only a hour. But you can think back on that hour and realize it can be done.


      THANKS SO MUCH for reading. And I hope you put this into practice. Please tell me if you do and update me weekly on how it has helped and if it has helped at all. I want to be of help to you guys. Take care.

      Also, this helps those with OCD.
       
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    2. Tinker Bell

      Tinker Bell Member Hall of Fame

      Location:
      U.S.
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      SSHL from virus
      Thank you! You precisely sum up many of the fears and worries that so often bounce around in my head. Your advice is also exactly what my own therapist and family have encouraged me to do. To recognize that I cannot change my tinnitus, but I can change my response to it.

      There are different ways to change our response, I think that depends a lot on our own personal experiences and coping strategies. But keeping our minds occupied -- like you mentioned -- is an important part of it.

      I remember thinking that if I could ignore the noise, I would be happy. Then one day I realized that when I'm happy, I ignore the noise. Maybe just for a moment or two, but isn't that the start of habituation?
       
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    3. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Natalier

      Natalier Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      May 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Hello, believe me when i say i didn't think this could work. I got these specific techniques from a really good doctor who happen to save my life 4 years ago as i also have OCD. Yes, you are right, there are different ways of coping, and this is just two of them. I suggest if the thoughts and anxiety associated really are a bother for you, try what i suggested for at least for a month. It doesnt hurt to try. Its good that when youre happy you forget thats brilliant. Thats progress. That is the start of habituation, even if it is having a moment or two of freedom. Unfortunately one can not be happy all the time, and we as humans have our ups and downs naturally. I try to be content rather than happy or sad. I personally dont like experiencing any strong emotion for too long as i know if doesnt stay. But i've only been dealing with this for 5 weeks so pently of time in my recovery and in yours. These techniques just speed it up for me, you can say. Thanks so much for reading. Take care.
       
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    4. ChineseHazel

      ChineseHazel Member

      Location:
      China
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Thanks!!!!Damn my poor English!I just can't let you know how I think and how I feel...
      It's high time to improve my English :grumpy:
       
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    5. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Natalier

      Natalier Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      May 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      English is my first language and i feel i need to improve it too. Lol
       
    6. ChineseHazel

      ChineseHazel Member

      Location:
      China
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      @Natalier Reading THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA right now lol
       
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    7. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Natalier

      Natalier Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      May 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I just finished reading a long book too. Took three days, it was so good and now im just bored. Lol have fun.
       
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    8. Mustonen

      Mustonen Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      It's remarkable how precise is your description of the thoughts i have.
      Thank your for your advice. I'll try to implement what you have suggested. I hope it will help me to accept my tinnitus.
       
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    9. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Natalier

      Natalier Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      May 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Even if it's only an hour of freedom from what you feel at least you had a good day to feel it. Update me weekly. or when you feel it necessary on if it's working for you. Like I said in the post, it's absolutely okay to feel if it's not working for you at first because this is something that takes time and effort to achieve. But hey we'll take this journey together. Feel better. Take care! :)
       
    10. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Natalier

      Natalier Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      May 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      ANXIETY RESIDUE

      Hello Everyone! So I want to talk about anxiety residue. What do I mean by this? I mean lingering anxiety after having combat the thoughts.

      You say "okay, I focused my attention on something else, but why do I still feel this nervousness, uneasiness, lightheadedness etc???....well, thats because its left over anxiety from the thought you just had.

      Ex. I will never get better.
      You switched to - what am I going to buy at the store?

      Now you are going through the list of things you need. But you still feel that sense of panic.
      Well, thats because you have begun to separate the thought from the feeling. Now you can see how these two things work. They work together quite well if you let them. They are best friends.

      As I said before, don't be discouraged. This anxiety will leave. It will pass. But that's why I said you must get used to the thought first. You must become it's best friend.

      The brain will realize, "crap this isn't scaring us anymore." Time to move on to another thought that will. The brain will constantly try to scary you or put it's self in danger mode or flight or fight because of this foreign noise it's experiencing.

      New thought. (Get used to it first.)

      EX. It will get worse in the future.
      You switched to - What should I dress the kids with?
      And you list out their clothes. And then do it.

      I promise you the more you do this, the more you feel free yourself from the anxiety, just give it time.

      Any way, Take Care. Thanks for reading.
       
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    11. Shera
      Bookworm

      Shera Member

      Location:
      USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/9/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      head trama caused TMJ/neck problems
      It's a little fuzzy, but I think I might get what you're saying. You need to address the negative thought you had, and then move on and actually do and focus on other things.
       
    12. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Natalier

      Natalier Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      May 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Anyone trying this in here?
      Yes, exactly. You must live with it for a while so it becomes non threating or at least semi non threatening. And then when it pops up and you are having a bad day or moment, begin to replace it immediately with something to do. Like I said, in the anxiety residue post, you will begin to separate the thoughts of depression, anxiety, tinnitus from the actually feelings and realize how its the reaction to the tinnitus that is your main issue. With this method over time you will care-less, like habituation, i guest you can say or speeding up the process of habituation. But its different for everyone. Will you be trying it? I always say try it out for a month and see.
       
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    13. Shera
      Bookworm

      Shera Member

      Location:
      USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/9/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      head trama caused TMJ/neck problems
      I think I will. In fact, I used it today before you even mentioned it. One of my best days yet.
       
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    14. ChineseHazel

      ChineseHazel Member

      Location:
      China
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Yesterday my friend cried about her T with me.I will let her try this.
      And I will tell you the process.
      Thanks,you did a brilliant job here,Natalie.
       
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    15. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Natalier

      Natalier Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      May 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      T
      Thats fantastic. The idea is to at least get an hour of freedom from the worry. Please do send me updates weekly, in case of any setbacks.
       
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    16. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Natalier

      Natalier Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      May 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Yes.
      Yes, Please do.
       
    17. MBH

      MBH Member

      Location:
      Upstate NY
      Tinnitus Since:
      06/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Overloaded stress
      Thank you for your detailed info about anxiety which is the worst symptom that comes with T I did not have it before. It help alot especially since T causes big anxiety.
       
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    18. Tinizzy
      Wishful

      Tinizzy Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      07/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Thanks Natalier! Very good original post. Im curious about your story. How did it help for you?
       
    19. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Natalier

      Natalier Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      May 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      My story started 4 years ago when I hit rock bottom in my life. I had the worst depression, anxiety, and felt like ending it all, but not because I wanted to, but because I felt couldn't escape what I felt. And not having a name on what I was feeling...caused me to go through a big swirl of negative emotions. But I made it through when I decided to go to the hospital for two weeks. It helped that I had a great doctor who I owe my life to and will always love dearly because he literally saved my life. I learned from him that when we can have someone say, I know exactly how you feel and can I put a name on it for you, and its a real problem thats not all in your head, it helps tremendously and then you can begin to take the steps to better yourself. These techniques are the ones he told me to use, and what helps me every single time.
      Though they may not work for everyone, but I always say everyone when they spend enough time with anxiety will develop their own coping techniques that are effective for them.

      I got tinnitus a few months ago, and when it came as a shhhh sound all those anxiety and depression feelings I felt 4 years ago came back, and I found it hard to get through this new obstactle. I was so scared again because I felt I couldnt deal with that constant noise. I went to doctors and checked everything. But i was able to pull myself out before it could get really bad. Cause if you let yourself, you go can go to some really dark places.

      For tinnitus, as a update, (I should make a post about this.) mine has gone down, and I dont want to Jinx myself but, I believe it was related to a flu, that when it left so did the tinnitus.
      But I thought about how if I would have gave up earlier I would of never known this and reached this point. So its always important to get through something and see the results. Time is key.

      And even if it didnt go away, i was already getting over it at the time anyway. So I would of been okay either way.
       
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