How to Relax at Home?

[TheDanishGirl]

I have had several good days and I know that part of what made them good is me going out with family/friend, doing house chores, going for walks, shopping.....essentially keeping myself somewhat busy.

But the problem is that that in not my natural nature, I am not an active person and I love (or used to) love spending a whole weekend at home in ugly clothing, with messy hair and reading a book or watching movies.

Now I feel I can only be allright/good if I am busy and if I try hanging out at home a whole day I get caught up in the "tinnitus web" i.e. listening to it, monitoring it and getting more and more frustrated and that to me is not relaxing.

But at the same time I have to find that perfect balance of keeping somewhat busy but also being able to stay at home a whole day and relaxing to keep myself from getting stressed out, as I do feel a bit stressed by all these active doings the past few days.

What can I do? I know it will probably be better as time goes by, but I am a little frustrated because I do not feel I can fully relax anymore and I miss my lazy days

 

[JoyBenz007]

I have been the same way lately! I actually loved being active especially at the gym but been so scared to go because of what I've read online, I'm scared to make it worse. Lately I've found keeping a fan on while I'm at my apartment makes me feel more relaxed as I'm not thinking about it constantly....

 

[TheDanishGirl]

I have been the same way lately! I actually loved being active especially at the gym but been so scared to go because of what I've read online, I'm scared to make it worse. Lately I've found keeping a fan on while I'm at my apartment makes me feel more relaxed as I'm not thinking about it constantly....

I do have a fan, maybe i should try it out. I must admit i think naturally active people (the kind who can not sit still for too long) have a much better chance of coping with T as they will naturally be preoccupied with other things....but it is just my guess.

Btw, i went to a small gym we have in my apartment building a couple of times, i used a cross trainer and rowing machine and i did not have an increase in T (although my heart was racing, i'm in really bad shape, LOL)

 

[Michael Leigh]

Btw, i went to a small gym we have in my apartment building a couple of times, i used a cross trainer and rowing machine and i did not have an increase in T (although my heart was racing, i'm in really bad shape, LOL)

Using the crosstrainer is fine as the feet don't come in contact with the floor, so there is no "impact" underfoot. I use a crosstrainer at home. I don't advise running on a treadmill or hard ground as it can make tinnitus worse for some people.

Michael

 

[glynis]

@TheDanishGirl ,
It's about feeling ok with yourself on your own in your home and feeling safe and relaxed as possible and happy in your own company .
Tinnitus is tough but keep relaxing music on in the background and try not let it make you low.
Love glynis xxx

 

[Sam Bridge]

Using the crosstrainer is fine as the feet don't come in contact with the floor, so there is no "impact" underfoot. I use a crosstrainer at home. I don't advise running on a treadmill or hard ground as it can make tinnitus worse for some people.

Michael

Interesting, sometimes i run for the bus in the morning , not for long but its on the pavement lol. No increase noted , i will keep that in mind though.

 

[Michael Leigh]

Interesting, sometimes i run for the bus in the morning , not for long but its on the pavement lol. No increase noted , i will keep that in mind though.

Not everyone with tinnitus is affected by running Sam, and remember your tinnitus isn't severe/intrusive.

 

[Candy]

I get it, am a sit downer, or do a bunch of stuff and then do nothing...I don't potter all day like some mums I know and the only way to beat this is to keep occupied, however I still chill in the afternoon and watch tv or surf the net which keeps me busy. Sunbathing or reading would be a no no at this stage for me...so worried about my holiday...

 

[Bobbie7]

When I want to relax, I lie down and listen to the smooth sounds of jazz at a very comfortable volume and I become so absorbed that I actually don't hear my tinnitus (even though I hear it while watching TV but some times forget about it then too) Ahhh.. the wonderful songs of Billie Holliday, Ella Fitzgerald and so many other jazz greats. I can almost picture being in one of those smoky, dimly-lit night clubs and hearing them. It's a pleasant and relaxing respite.

 

[Michael Leigh]

My tinnitus is variable in intensity. Providing it isn't at a severe level, my relaxation is reading. If it's a book by one of my favourite author's, crime writer Peter James then I'm in my element. My other pastime is listening to classical, opera and jazz music. As an Audiophile I strife to hear every nuance in my musical recordings and can tell in an instant, when something doesn't sound right in my Audio system. I am immensely thankful that tinnitus hasn't prevented me from enjoying music and hope this continues.

Michael

 

[TheDanishGirl]

Unfortunetly their is nothing inactive that i become so absorbed in that i forget my tinnitus, even reading a really good book or watching a really good movie. I still do those things but i hear my T 98% of the time

Hopefully that will change in time, i'm still new to this after all.

 

[Michael Leigh]

Unfortunetly their is nothing inactive that i become so absorbed in that i forget my tinnitus, even reading a really good book or watching a really good movie. I still do those things but i hear my T 98% of the time Hopefully that will change in time, i'm still new to this after all.

In time you will habituate and tinnitus will be of no importance. In the mean time surround yourself with positivity. This doesn't mean never to be negative. Please read this post to see what I mean: https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/is-positivity-important.23150/

All the best
Michael

 

[TheDanishGirl]

In time you will habituate and tinnitus will be of no importance. In the mean time surround yourself with positivity. This doesn't mean never to be negative. Please read this post to see what I mean: https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/is-positivity-important.23150/

All the best
Michael

Yes positivity is key. I have started a journal where each day i write down 3-5 or more things that i have been grateful for or have brought me some happiness on that day. I also note if i have experienced forgetting about the T for minutes at a time, to become aware of my progress. Hopefully it will help me on days where i am feeling low.

 

[Michael Leigh]

Yes positivity is key. I have started a journal where each day i write down 3-5 or more things that i have been grateful for or have brought me some happiness on that day. I also note if i have experienced forgetting about the T for minutes at a time, to become aware of my progress. Hopefully it will help me on days where i am feeling low.

You have lived your whole life up to the last few months having no knowledge of tinnitus. All of a sudden, this intrusion has come upon you and it will take time for your brain to adjust to it and to accept that that the tinnitus noise is unimportant and slowly push it into the background. This is the reason positivity is so important. Medication helps and so does counselling (talk therapy). However, even with these things, ultimately one has to try for themselves by will power and it can be done. We all have to find our own way of coping with it and it looks like you've found yours.

Some people I'm sorry to say are looking for quick results and are not willing to accept that patience is required and some work on our part is necessary for habituation to occur. Anything worthwhile in life never comes easily and don't forget, life is problematic and everyone has problems. We just have to dust ourselves down and get on with it the best that we can.

Michael

 

[Shera]

But the problem is that that in not my natural nature, I am not an active person and I love (or used to) love spending a whole weekend at home in ugly clothing, with messy hair and reading a book or watching movies.

I feel you. I am a huge bookworm and I need to read. I didn't have as much problem watching movies and reading when I first got it, could tune it out better. (That's when it was quieter.) Now it's hard. I hear it during the movie/shows all the time. Especially when it increases at night. (Which is my favorite relax time.)

I am an active person, but I like down time too. I hate having the fan on all the time.

I try to read off and on. I'm still watching movies and a few times I've fallen into it enough to ignore the T. Not as much as I'd like, but it's happening. I'm probably where you're at with the 98% aware. However, I am enjoying the shows/movies more. I think it just takes time.

 

[Sean]

I feel you. I am a huge bookworm and I need to read. I didn't have as much problem watching movies and reading when I first got it, could tune it out better. (That's when it was quieter.) Now it's hard. I hear it during the movie/shows all the time. Especially when it increases at night. (Which is my favorite relax time.)

I am an active person, but I like down time too. I hate having the fan on all the time.

I try to read off and on. I'm still watching movies and a few times I've fallen into it enough to ignore the T. Not as much as I'd like, but it's happening. I'm probably where you're at with the 98% aware. However, I am enjoying the shows/movies more. I think it just takes time.

@Shera , white noise in the background doesn't help ?

 

[Shera]

white noise in the background doesn't help ?

It does, but I hate relying on it so much. Though the later it gets sometimes the white noise doesn't help.

Plus, our house is dead quiet right now. When we open up the windows to cool off sometimes the outside noises help.

 

[TheDanishGirl]

I feel you. I am a huge bookworm and I need to read. I didn't have as much problem watching movies and reading when I first got it, could tune it out better. (That's when it was quieter.) Now it's hard. I hear it during the movie/shows all the time. Especially when it increases at night. (Which is my favorite relax time.)

I am an active person, but I like down time too. I hate having the fan on all the time.

I try to read off and on. I'm still watching movies and a few times I've fallen into it enough to ignore the T. Not as much as I'd like, but it's happening. I'm probably where you're at with the 98% aware. However, I am enjoying the shows/movies more. I think it just takes time.

Yes, it does take time last night i was at home and managed to really relax and enjoy myself. I watched a movie and was able to concentrate and actually forgot about my T every now and then, so that is a big succes to me....it will be possible for me to relax at home again and i am sure it will for you too.

 

[Michael Leigh]

It does, but I hate relying on it so much. Though the later it gets sometimes the white noise doesn't help. Plus, our house is dead quiet right now. When we open up the windows to cool off sometimes the outside noises help.

If the fan is masking your tinnitus @Shera so you are unable to it then it's not such a good idea. For the brain to habituate to tinnitus it must be able to hear it. I realise the climate might be hot but think about what I've said.
All the best
Michael

 

[Shera]

If the fan is masking your tinnitus @Shera so you are unable to it then it's not such a good idea. For the brain to habituate to tinnitus it must be able to hear it. I realise the climate might be hot but think about what I've said.
All the best
Michael

Most of the time I'm in silence. I try not to cover or mask, I'm currently try the "Back to Silence" approach.

 

[Michael Leigh]

Most of the time I'm in silence. I try not to cover or mask, I'm currently try the "Back to Silence" approach.

Hi @Shera,
I may not have put my point accross clearly so will say this again and hope you don't mind. It is not good to stay in a silent room and listen to your tinnitus. When I suggest using "sound enrichment" one can use nature sounds or music during the day, set the volume slightly below your tinnitus but not to mask it (cover it up) so it can't be heard. At night, music is not advisable for sound enrichment as it draws attention to itself. Therefore, nature sounds is ideal. Again, setting the volume slightly below your tinnitus and playing throughout the night until morning.
All the best
Michael

 

[Shera]

@Michael Leigh Nope I gotcha. I tried doing more of the "sound enrichment" , but it made me feel more aware. I try to balance out the "sound enrichment" and silence. Like when I work on a design, I have the music on low. Most of the time when I'm working I don't though, simply because I have to wander sometimes to finish the project.

I do think being in silence and not caring so much about covering it up helps. I tried sleeping again with "sound enrichment" drove me bonkers. I can fall asleep pretty fast now and if I wake up I use the back to silence method to go back to sleep. That and I'm rewatching Sons of Anarchy . . . my dreams have been very inviting.

 

[Michael Leigh]

I do think being in silence and not caring so much about covering it up helps. I tried sleeping again with "sound enrichment" drove me bonkers. I can fall asleep pretty fast now and if I wake up I use the back to silence method to go back to sleep. That and I'm rewatching Sons of Anarchy . . . my dreams have been very inviting.

With respect @Shera You may think that you are doing the right thing but I don't think that you are. The purpose of using sound enrichment at night and for the whole night is to supply your brain and auditory system with sound at low level. If your brain hears quiet during the night it has the ability to search for sound from the environment. In the process it will turn up its internal volume control and at the same time increasing the tinnitus. Therefore, the tinnitus will become louder and more intrusive during waking hours.

It is for this reason, some people with hearing loss develop tinnitus because the brain turns up its volume in order to hear sounds that it is finding difficulty hearing due to hearing loss. Once a person is fitted with a hearing aid, this supplies the brain with the missing frequencies that it in unable to hear. Over time the brain will "turn down" its internal volume control and the tinnitus will also reduce.

The same thing applies during the day. It is always best to have low level sound playing in the background in preference to being in a silent room. Silence is the worst thing for someone with tinnitus. Professor Pawel Jastreboff mentions this in the TRT (Tinnitus Retraining Therapy book) that all Audiologist and Hearing Therapists follow that teach Tinnitus retraining therapy. This is most likely the reason your tinnitus is becoming more noticeable, because you are not using sound enrichment properly on a regular basis. However, it is your choice.

Take care and all the best
Michael

 

[BobDigi]

I have had several good days and I know that part of what made them good is me going out with family/friend, doing house chores, going for walks, shopping.....essentially keeping myself somewhat busy.

But the problem is that that in not my natural nature, I am not an active person and I love (or used to) love spending a whole weekend at home in ugly clothing, with messy hair and reading a book or watching movies.

Now I feel I can only be allright/good if I am busy and if I try hanging out at home a whole day I get caught up in the "tinnitus web" i.e. listening to it, monitoring it and getting more and more frustrated and that to me is not relaxing.

But at the same time I have to find that perfect balance of keeping somewhat busy but also being able to stay at home a whole day and relaxing to keep myself from getting stressed out, as I do feel a bit stressed by all these active doings the past few days.

What can I do? I know it will probably be better as time goes by, but I am a little frustrated because I do not feel I can fully relax anymore and I miss my lazy days

It will get easier to relax with t I assure you. I did what you are doing right now. I stayed busy, tried finding hobbies that make a noise, spent too much time with people and basically did anything except sit down and relax. UOU Will Though. And you'll realise you haven't thought about your T for an hour. Then 2, then 3 and so on and so on, until you almost go a whole day. You'll be OK.

 

[Sean]

With respect @Shera You may think that you are doing the right thing but I don't think that you are. The purpose of using sound enrichment at night and for the whole night is to supply your brain and auditory system with sound at low level. If your brain hears quiet during the night it has the ability to search for sound from the environment. In the process it will turn up its internal volume control and at the same time increasing the tinnitus. Therefore, the tinnitus will become louder and more intrusive during waking hours.

It is for this reason, some people with hearing loss develop tinnitus because the brain turns up its volume in order to hear sounds that it is finding difficulty hearing due to hearing loss. Once a person is fitted with a hearing aid, this supplies the brain with the missing frequencies that it in unable to hear. Over time the brain will "turn down" its internal volume control and the tinnitus will also reduce.

The same thing applies during the day. It is always best to have low level sound playing in the background in preference to being in a silent room. Silence is the worst thing for someone with tinnitus. Professor Pawel Jastreboff mentions this in the TRT (Tinnitus Retraining Therapy book) that all Audiologist and Hearing Therapists follow that teach Tinnitus retraining therapy. This is most likely the reason your tinnitus is becoming more noticeable, because you are not using sound enrichment properly on a regular basis. However, it is your choice.

Take care and all the best
Michael

@Michael Leigh .. Buddhist monks gets T after meditating in silence for few years . They give spiritual significance to this ringing since it happens after long period of silent meditation. I guess our ears do need little bit of sound .