I Feel Like Such a Failure :(

bill 112 · Apr 13, 2016

Mario martz said: ↑

Im Mario! hahahaha
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Auto correct thinks your a Martin Mario hahaha

hoper · Aug 1, 2016

bill 112 said: ↑

I'm just feeling so down and remorseful lately,I just feel like such a failure and an idiot for trying to live a life.After I developed H in 2014 I tried my best to get my life on track and after two years I was doing much much better.This was all down to one man and that was my father.He helped me through it all,he seen what I had been through and it was him that got me through the dark days and back living to some degree again.My father knew that I was much better but knew deep down I wasn't happy.He told me that I needed to start living a life again and I did for the most part,but I wasn't truly ready to get back out again either.Sure I would see my mates and go to work and indulge in my passion that is cars,but I was thinking about my ears,what if this made it worse or that made it worse,I let it define who I was and swallow me up.Sure my T was very mild by now and my H was 85% better but I was always afraid of the Unknown.That was until my father passed away suddenly on the 27th of October,I sat by his bed and promised him I'd do him proud,that I would build a life and a family and not be stopped by my fear of sound!As I seen him slip away I was thrown into the darkest place of my life,my one and only crutch was gone forever.But I had made him a promise and I was going to do him proud no matter what!I began socialising again being careful not to over do it.I met a fantastic woman who understood my condition,she was my sidekick always looking out for me and my ears.We went to London on a trip,a comedy show and a few family gatherings always protecting when needed.It was the first time in years that I can truly say I was happy,I was living a life again.I looked after my family and done what I could for them,I had taken over for my father as the guardian for the family.Then in March my T and H returned much stronger and debilitating than ever,one month on and there's no improvement,I can barely get out of the bed in the morning it's that bad!I feel like such an idiot for trying to live a life again and I feel like I've let my father down,I just don't know what to do anymore,I feel I've finally met my maker and it's all my faultI miss my life,I miss everything so much but I never seen this coming.Just need some support,today's my 24th birthday and I'm just completely miserable.
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but you have a girlfriend.

#forever alone guy here

bill 112 · Aug 1, 2016

hoper said: ↑

but you have a girlfriend.

#forever alone guy here
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A girlfriend isn't everything man,not that I'm complaining don't get me wrong but as we say here in Ireland your health is your wealth.I feel sorry for her,having this disabled boyfriend that she didn't ask for and now she's stuck with me.She thinks I'm crazy for saying those things and that she loves me no matter what but still,I can't help but feel guilty.

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I Feel Like Such a Failure :(

bill 112 Member

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bill 112 Member

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I Feel Like Such a Failure :(

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bill 112 Member

hoper Member

bill 112 Member

Ca(2+)n You Feel the Noise?

Waking Up an Hour After Falling Asleep with a Feeling of Being Electrocuted and Tinnitus 5x Louder

How Would You Feel? The Person Who Caused My Ear Injury Now Hates Me Because of It?

What Does Feeling Pressure in Ear (No Pain) After Exposure to Loud Noise Mean?

Severe Noxacusis (Pain Hyperacusis) — Feels Like My Life Is Over

Share This Page