I Got Drunk and Made a Terrible Mistake. Morse Code Tinnitus.

Hi everyone, I registered on these forums 6 months ago, just one month after getting tinnitus, but decided I'm brave enough now to read about T after getting anxiety attacks just reading about it.

As the title suggests I made a terrible mistake and fear the worst.
After isolating myself for almost 7 months I got an invitation from some friends to go out and have fun. I'm actively enrolled in a TRT program and have the noise generators, I wear these religiously.
So with that on my side I felt brave and went out. We stayed out very late and I got so many drinks.
They kept buying/giving me beer so I just drank it, haven't drank like that since my college days.
And it took its toll, I felt relaxed but was also out of control.

We were going to meet up with my brother's girlfriend who was at a lounge bar.
I was cool with everything, until it turned out this lounge bar was actually more of a nightclub.
Being under influence I didn't make an issue out of it. First part of the stay we were outside on the balcony and then in the smoker's area which is a bit sheltered from the main area. But then they closed the windows and access to the balcony to prevent noise complaints after a certain hour.

The party moved to the bar area and that's when I realised this place is louder than any night club/bar I've ever been to in my life. I wasn't prepared for this so I didn't bring my ear protection. I couldn't hear the people around me anymore and I started to panic. I don't know how long I was in that area before I left. But my total stay in the club was 1 hour and 7 mins. I can trace this in my google maps history that tracks my movements.

The day after my T was very spiked and I did the dumb thing of playing video games with my friends wearing headphones, just to take my mind of the T and the horrible hangover I had. After 3 days the T finally settled, but this is where the nightmare begins. I noticed this morse code style of beeping in my right ear on top of my regular T. I've had this before but very faint and it would usually go. It would always be in my right ear. And so again I got this but noticeably louder only this time it hasn't gone for atleast a couple of days. And this morning I woke up with it in my left ear as well for the very first time. I'm very scared I got hearing loss or some sort of damage to my ears from that visit to that night club.

Last time I went to my audiologist and my hearing got checked I had perfect hearing.
Now my ears feel muffled and sore and I've got the fast beeping sounds on top of it.
Worst part of it all is that the noise generators seems to aggravate it rather than soothe it.
I'm very scared I caused real damage to my hearing and T and I'm so angry at myself for letting this happen.

Has anyone ever experienced something similar?

I've been in a non stop anxiety attack the past few days and don't know what to do.
My next audiologist appointment is next Wednesday.

 

Hi there,

you are just scared right now and your ears are feeling it. The anxiety and the actual sound/events are just giving you and your ears a hard time. What is done..is done, try to remain calm and don't think of the WHAT IFs. This won't help, just move forward and don't think of the past.

It takes time for tinnitus/spikes to settle down, anxiety just revs up the spikes and tinnitus more. You made a mistake, all of us make mistakes, just remain calm and wait for your next appointment.

Take care...

 

First up, don't beat yourself up. Having tinnitus isn't some life sentence where you can no longer go out and enjoy yourself.

I made the mistake after my first habituation of having a particularly loud weekend away with friends, that included a couple of rock gigs and loud clubs, all without ear protection. To say it exacerbated my tinnitus is an understatement. I had a very difficult few months after this that were full of regret of my actions but what is done is done.

Your tinnitus can most definitely improve. You just have to give it time. Anxiety is your enemy right now as your brain is locked in the fight or flight response to this new unwelcome stimulus in your head. After a few months I got my anxiety under control and my tinnitus backed off.

I got myself a set of moulded musician earplugs custom made that I carry religiously with me if there's a chance i'll end up in a loud environment. I would recommend going down the same road if you may find yourself in similar environments in future.

All the best.

 

Thank you so much for your encouraging words. I'm trying so much to get the best of the anxiety. It's hard but I think i can stay strong. It helps to know that my next appointment is in 5 days. I'll try and keep myself busy until then.

 

Hi eldudebro, thank you so much for sharing your experience with me. Anxiety is a hard thing to get under control, but I'm doing my absolute best to stay strong. It helps a lot to hear from someone who went through the same as I'm going through right now. And I guess if the fast beeping tinnitus doesn't go away it's just something else I'll need to work on and habituate to. Even though I don't see that possible in this exact moment, I'll just look at it day by day.

 

@eldudebro Where would I be able get those custom moulded musician plugs?

 

Maybe try supplements like magnesium and n-acetyl-cysteine, it will maybe help repair some of the damage.

 

A very helpful post! Thank you. Do you have hypercausis too? I was stupidly strimming the garden a month ago (with Pelter muffs on) and my ears have acquired a buzzing noise that now seems to increase and react to stuff like the shower, tv, tumble drier etc... I'm so pissed at myself! X

 

A really positive attitude to have! It's so hard to not be mad at yourself especially when you feel progress was being made! I'm there just now too and we have to hope that we can overcome this hurdle! Hope your ears settle soon! X

 

I am also from Belgium, I got mine from Variphone. Look it up.
Also, don't blame yourself too much, we all made "mistakes" like that, and there is a very good chance it will improve. I've gone through two episodes similiar as you.

 

Working on the magnesium. It happened last Saturday hope I'm not too late.

 

I just can't believe that such a slip up can cause something so permanent. But there's no point in beating yourself up over it. Staying strong is what's going to help us overcome this. Hope your ears settle soon too!

 

Thanks for the tip! I'll look into getting some asap.

 

Absolutely! It's the unforgiving nature of this thing I just can't get my head around!!! We are only human at the end of the day, no one is infallible!! X

 

Your best bet would be to find an audiologist who offer custom earplug service

When my tinnitus started back in 2014 I had mild hyperacusis for a few weeks then it disappeared. I'm lucky in that respect that it's not something I've had to deal with along with tinnitus. From what i've read over the years from people who have it is that generally it improves if not disappears over time.

 

It has been a week now and I just noticed my hearing in my right ear is slightly worse than before. Could this be temporary or should I get it checked out. I'm in full panic mode right now that I might have gotten hearing loss.

 

I feel your panic and despair and it's really horrible and unfair. If you're worried about it, maybe best to get it checked out to put your mind at rest. Such an unbelievably cruel condition.

 

Went to the ER, they prescribed me MEDROL and Betaserc. They said it's a bit late in case of noise trauma, but it might still be worth it to take it. Wednesday I'm seeing my audiologist. What is done is done, but it's good to have peace of mind and know what you're dealing with.

 

I had this beeping tinnitus for a while. Started in October and ye I gotta admit it was there for a while (months I think)..then it just disappeared. Just suddenly it was gone.

It sometimes still comes back for a short time...

Mine started because of noise exposure. I was so scared it would be there forever. So hard to concentrate on anything when you hear the "vehicle backing backwards" beeping. Falling asleep and staying asleep was hard.

The constant beeping felt so humiliating.. like I was ABUSED. Ye that's what it was. Felt violated.

 

Absolutely. At least you can be reassured that you took reasonable steps to help yourself. It's confusing knowing what the best thing always is to do. I hope you get on ok with your Audiology appointment. Keep us posted!

 

Oh my! What an amazing feeling! What noise, if any do you have now?

 

Now I have constant shizzling lol. It doesn't bother me that much!!!!! And some other constant high pitched tones, but they are not "too loud" and are masked when I'm not in "complete silence" so I try to have some other sound present. Man now that I wrote that T doesn't bother me it's gonna start again maybe lol.

Used to have this kinda tinnitus too that reacted to all sounds. Like if I was listening to music the sound would "whistle" along the music.. and when someone talked their voice would trigger the "whistle". It too stopped.. but ye it still comes back to remind me for a while.....what an annoying friend

 

Hw long untill this reactive tinnitus stopped? Sounds just like mine

 

Is it gone now mate. I just started getting it too. How loud was your morse code sound?

 

Hi @Pavlos,

As far as i am concerned, i also got this morse code type tinnitus.. and i'm just 6 months in since onset. I would like to know if you get used to it now that time has past ?

Any update would be great

Thanks

 

Hey, just read your story. Its a bit late but I also had a spike from a loud place you go out in and from headphones.
I now always come prepaired for these scenario's.
- I always have earplugs on my keychain (Earpeace is the brand I use)
- I have music volume limited headphones that can't be turned higher then 85db (Etymotic EK5)
Hope your doing better.

 

So whatever happened, @Pavlos? Do you still have tinnitus or did it go away?

 

Oh how I long for the days when the statement, ‘I got drunk and made a terrible mistake’ wasn’t then followed by a reference to f***ing tinnitus.