I Really Need Help and Support. My Life Is Ruined.

Discussion in 'Support' started by robin44, Mar 19, 2015.

tinnitus forum
    1. robin44
      Happy

      robin44 Member

      I'm gonna try to keep this as short as possible.

      My name is Robin, I am 18 years old. Exactly one month ago I got a ringing in my ears. Cause? I don't know. I just sat home, smoked some cannabis (I'm no junkie, I rarely smoke), listened to music on my headset and bam. There it was.

      It held on for about 5 days but then gradually became better until it was gone the 9th day. I was so happy. But as I'm an unlucky bastard it came back again just 3 or 4 days later. Still here...

      Getting tinnitus had been my greatest fear since I learned what it was. I can't accept the fact that I have it.

      I'm crying everyday. I haven't met my friends since it started. I don't feel like living anymore. I won't take my life though as I care too much about my family to do such a thing.

      The doctors haven't helped me but I will meet a ENT next week.


      I love my parents for their great support but I also want to hear from people that really knows about this.

      Is it even possible for my tinnitus to go away?
       
      • Hug Hug x 3
    2. geg1992
      English

      geg1992 Member

      Location:
      England
      Tinnitus Since:
      05/12/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise exposure + Antibiotics
      You're still very new to this, there's every chance it could still go away.

      It feels like it's the end of the world to begin with, but it gets better, you just need to give it time.

      Try to get on with life as best you can, that's the best thing I've done. I only missed one day at work as I found being at work really helped take my mind off it. Just try to live normally as you would, but avoid loud sounds and use of headphones. I tend to avoid all noises over 85db at the moment, or wear ear plugs otherwise. I still go to football/soccer matches with ear plugs in.
       
      • Agree Agree x 4
    3. Quentino
      Tired

      Quentino Member

      Location:
      France
      Tinnitus Since:
      05/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Decrease of Hearing i presume.
      Yup, possible. Not common but it can happen, Tinnitus is hard to understand. But do not focus on this, this is my advice!

      But for now relax. This ringing disoriented your sense of hearing, and now you are in a period of panic about something that you do not understand totally yet. This is normal, and i’m sure the majority of Tinnituw talk users had the same hard time.
      I had the same reaction that you. I know you’ll not believe me now, but this is temporary. You are currently in shock, so it’s normal that you cry or feel depressed.

      My advice is to be active, to avoid falling into a new period of stress and fear : try to avoid searching for your T when you not hear it ( if it happens) and "force" you, try to keep doing the things you love in life, even if at the beginning it give no relief : you will progressively be more focused on this, and less about T.
      It can take some time yes, but without noticing it you will be less and less focused on your T.

      Go see your friends, explain them your situation, i’m sure they will support you and that help a lot! Believe me!

      Keep cool man, when there is a problem, there is a solution. ;)
       
      • Optimistic Optimistic x 1
    4. Karl28
      Wishful

      Karl28 Member

      Location:
      Melbourne
      Tinnitus Since:
      2001 bad since 2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loud music via headphones
      Wasnt there some thing I read about taking some kind of steroids just after you get T to help it go away but only just after you get it?

      Also I'd avoid all loud noises / music for a while so you can heal
       
    5. billie48
      Sunshine

      billie48 Member Benefactor Hall of Fame Ambassador Team Research

      Location:
      Vancouver, Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2009
      Welcome Robin to the board. You are at the right place here because most of us here have been where you are. Your reaction to things including the fear, the loss of interest in life or things, the crying, the sleeplessness etc, is quite common and normal for new T sufferer. I know of an admin on another board who cried for 2 years but he habituates and now live a normal life. So don't be too worry about the present sufferings. They will pass.

      Beware of many distorted thoughts at this initial suffering phase, as the brain is traumatized by T ringing and the nerve is under the influence of the limbic system which causes you to function in fight or flight mode. In such mode every sensation and discomfort will feel much worse. The body is trying to protect you as it falsely think T is a threat and so it reacts harshly and negatively to it.

      So the trick is to re-educate the brain that T is not a threat. How? By trying to understand it more. By reading lots of success stories, and by applying some of the insights you learn from others. By most importantly by giving it time and learning acceptance of things we can't control. You will find many helpful hints from others in the success stories. Masking is another way you tell the brain that T is livable and so not a threat. If you haven't done so, try masking asap. You can download a free sound generator called 'aire freshener' to your PC. You can also buy a sound machine for bed time masking. I also used an ipod during the worst time so I could do masking on the go. If you need it as a last resort, you can ask the doctor for some meds for controlling the anxiety, depression and sleeplessness. That was what I had to do to survive my initial struggle. Take care and God bless.
       
      • Like Like x 1
    6. dayl

      dayl Member

      Location:
      Castleford
      Tinnitus Since:
      ....
      Dude I understand what your going through I smoked weed listen some tunes got t. Am coming upto a year now and trust me it gets better when it first happened I freaked out thought my life was ruined but have habituated too it sure I would give my left bollock for silence but what can we do? Stay active go gym go jogging try and occupy your mind it will get easier mate I promise your still in shock at the moment take care keep your chin up
       
      • Agree Agree x 2
    7. MattK

      MattK Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2/13/2014
      Dayl, I remember you when yours first hit. I'm glad to hear that you're doing better.
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
    8. dayl

      dayl Member

      Location:
      Castleford
      Tinnitus Since:
      ....
      The steroid karl28 is referring to is called prednisone however I have no expierence with it
       
    9. dayl

      dayl Member

      Location:
      Castleford
      Tinnitus Since:
      ....
      Hey mattk thanks yeah I remember speaking to you in chat how are you?
       
    10. MattK

      MattK Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2/13/2014
      I think this is a big mistake. Continue to meet with your friends and hang out. The more you do what you normally do, the more you realize that life goes on. I remember when T first hit me, I didn't want to do anything either. But once I started to do the things I enjoyed again, things really began to turn around for me. I don't think I would have been able to keep my sanity if not for the strong support I had from my friends.

      Plus, here's a way I look at it: you have tinnitus at the moment. You can approach your day by isolating yourself and staying in bed all day, or you can do the things you enjoy again and get your life back. Regardless of what you choose, you'll have tinnitus at the end of the day. So why isolate yourself and not enjoy your life?
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
    11. MattK

      MattK Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2/13/2014
      Like you, doing a lot better! I still have T obviously, but you know, I have gotten to a point where it really doesn't affect my daily life, whether I notice it or not. And I never really thought I'd say this, but most of the time, I don't notice at all. I have a bit of an obsessive personality, so I used to obsess over it, and if I didn't hear it, I would go into a quiet place to try to hear it to make sure it is still there. Stupid, I know. I also didn't think I would habituate at first, because my tinnitus changes sound and frequency constantly... kind of like the fine tuning of a radio but you can't quite get the right signal so you keep tuning. So it is constantly wavering, changing pitch, changing volume, etc... but yet, somehow, I've gone from hating life, to coping, to being habituated.
       
      • Like Like x 1
      • Agree Agree x 1
    12. dayl

      dayl Member

      Location:
      Castleford
      Tinnitus Since:
      ....
      Good am glad to hear it Matt my t is the same changing tones etc have got used to it now I don't sleep with any aids do you? 1 of my good friends said the other day that what we got sends people crazy suicide etc just laughed in is face am a man not a mouse I can handle this shit lol
       
      • Like Like x 1
    13. robin44
      Happy

      robin44 Member

      I appreciate all the support I can get, I really do. Even though I just wanna read the words ''it will go away''.

      My life wasn't perfect before this. I've had a shitload of things bringing me down in life but this is by far the worst. I really didn't need this.

      So by my understanding and from what I've read it can go either way? It might as well disappear or it might not?


      It did disappear for a couple of days like I said but came back. I was at my mothers plays at the time then. I don't meet her often at all as she moved to live with her fiance while I decided to stay to live with my dad.

      Funny thing is that the ringing came back as I went back to my dad. Coincidence?


      Another ironic thing is that 2 days before I got this ringing at all I came across this ''Miracle Tinnitus Cure'' hoax for some reason and thought ''I'm so glad I haven't got this yet''.

      I'm a musician, I play loud music in my MP3 when I'm outside on my way somewhere and I go to concerts sometimes. But I've never had the feeling that I'm hurting my ears. So I wasn't ready for this.

      I had actually bought a 4-day ticket to Sweden Rock Festival which me and a group of friends were gonna go to but I feel right now that it ain't gonna happen..........
       
    14. dayl

      dayl Member

      Location:
      Castleford
      Tinnitus Since:
      ....
      By the sounds of it possibly could go with it coming and going dont soind like acoustic trauma IMO that's what I got which is for life but it is what it is can't change it so rolling with it. Its funny you mention was watching something about t then jinxing yourself same happened to me I was watching people who was deaf getting cocklear implant in which makes buzzing noises I thought hope too god I don't get this ringing then bam! Karma destiny coincidence either 1 of those. If you go concert make sure take ear plugs
       
      • Like Like x 1
    15. MattK

      MattK Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2/13/2014
      I do sleep with rain sound. I could probably do without it, but I like having the background noise. But when I read, I can read in silence.

      You sound a lot better... I do remember you said doctors found a small hole in your ear drum... I take it that didn't fix it?
       
    16. Lorenzo74
      Mellow

      Lorenzo74 Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Italy
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2013
      Hey Robin..

      You are still young and early on your T condition, so you have every chance that it could still go away on its own.. but in the meantime keep yourself busy and active (I swim, do yoga and indoor rock-climbing)… do the things you like to do while protecting your ears at the same time…

      It could also be that a stressful situation has brought it to your life, so try to calm down the sadness and anxiety, breath deep and focus on the good things, reach out to your family, friends, and definitely in here as everybody here knows how you feel… we all gone through it but most of us came out stronger and able to enjoy life again independently of T…

      Do not project T in the future, live in the moment and appreciate all you have and can do despite T…

      Keep it cool and I am sure soon you will be ok, with or without it..

      Try masking it at night with some sounds so you don't focus on it..

      Really wish you well and keep us updated.. Go read success stories and you will see how people have conquer it…

      Take care of yourself and your ears :)

      Lorenzo
       
      • Like Like x 1
    17. Karl28
      Wishful

      Karl28 Member

      Location:
      Melbourne
      Tinnitus Since:
      2001 bad since 2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loud music via headphones
      I sure as hell wouldn't risk it if I were you.
      Is it really worth a few hours of fun for an increase in tinnitus?
       
      • Agree Agree x 2
    18. linearb
      Psychedelic

      linearb Member Hall of Fame

      Location:
      East Coast USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      1998
      This may actually have more to do with your problem than you realize. Almost anyone will hear some amount of high and low pitched sounds when in perfect silence. People who are unusually sensitive to sensory information, may actually be able to give themselves tinnitus simply by becoming aware of these normal sounds, focusing on them, getting better at hearing them, and then developing a perception-fear-perception cycle that makes the sound louder.

      Sure, I've seen stories of spontaneous remission even after years. Neurology changes a lot between the ages of 18-25.

      Definitely protect your ears; don't do rock shows/etc without earplugs. Probably don't shoot guns/fireworks at all, even with plugs.

      If you start really taking care of your hearing now, well, you're very young, and it's reasonable to expect that you might end up with much better hearing by age 50/60 than you would have had otherwise, if you hadn't worried about it and protected your ears! Most people in the civilized world gradually go deaf, but this is not an inescapable fact of life, it's a regrettable side effect of the noisy modern world in which we live. Hearing tests on octogenarians living in traditional / nomadic cultures, have shown that their hearing thresholds are as good/better as the typical 25 year old in the US...
       
      • Genius Genius x 1
    19. RB2014
      Confused

      RB2014 Member Benefactor

      Location:
      US
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2014 became noticable
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loss of hearing and then stress and anxiety
      I'm sure you want to isolate yourself from the world right now, but I can tell you that it wont start to get better until you start living your old life again. Sitting at home in silence listening to it is not the way to go. Once you calm down and start accepting and ignoring it, it will get better. Way easier said than done, I know.
      Good news is they are researching and I believe they are pretty close to figuring this thing out and coming out with some type of pill to help. The way I look at it is that I just have to wait it out. In the mean time don't torture yourself because it will just make it much worst. You have to calm down. If you don't, you will end up like me where 4 months later when you have calmed down, you body won't let you, and you will end up on meds to help control it all. You have to start by believing you will get better and you might. If you don't believe you will get better, than it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.

      I almost forgot. Stay really far away from really loud places.
       

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