Metal Container Fell on Concrete Floor — My Tinnitus Became Instantly Worse

Discussion in 'Support' started by object16, May 8, 2021.

    1. object16
      Magical

      object16 Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      1988
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      overuse of hearing protection, plus noise
      I was in the lunch room with quiet conversation. I already have tinnitus and hyperacusis. Someone opened her locker right behind me, she had her lunch in a round metal container, she fumbled it and it fell flat straight down on the floor, which is a concrete floor. It sounded like a shotgun going off, and instantly my tinnitus went way worse.

      I could not work, because the tinnitus was too loud, so I went straight home, took 2 mg of Clonazepam, and went to bed.

      Today, the next day, my tinnitus is quite intrusive and abnormally loud. I am very depressed, and even looked up the Pegasus website. 10,000 euros, and my problem will be solved, permanently.

      I am going on 65 and was hoping for maybe 10 or 15 years more of enjoyable life. I really love my job, and the workplace really enjoys having me doing my work. However, I am totally depressed now.

      I have had spikes before, and each spike take longer and longer to recover from, and I am never back to my baseline.

      I have had conversations with other members here, and people seem to somehow learn to tolerate it. I just feel like paying my 10,000 euros, book a flight to Switzerland, and end it all. I have no terminal illness. In fact I am otherwise in good health. However, for the past 4-5 years I have been pushing more and more meds to try to cope with lack of sleep, and my mind just does not function the way it should. I have trouble concentrating, and I have trouble solving simple logic puzzles. I mean everyday logic, such as how do I replace a light switch. I am spending more and more of my time in bed. And the meds make me gain weight, and I can't get to sleep without stuffing myself with food.

      I regret having to post such a dismal writing, I know everyone is supposed to stay positive and practice mindfulness. The tinnitus is killing me. Up until yesterday, I was somehow coping, although my work has been falling behind, and I am having trouble keeping up, with overdue reports, and struggling with how to formulate reports. No one really knows how much this is dragging me down. Sometimes I imagine I can go in on the weekend to make a dent in my backlog. However, I find I spend almost the entire weekend in bed, and often show up for work at 10 am or 11 am or even at noon, or even at 1 pm where the normal start time is 9 am. One of my colleagues has taken over my duties which normally take place at 9 am and 10 am so that helps, and another colleague has taken over some of my other duties, to give me a chance to recover. However, it seems like everything is going downhill for me.

      And then yesterday happened. It was like a shotgun going off, right next to my ear, and it seems like I am done. My wife is religious and does not believe in termination of life. However, she does not have what I have. She is somewhat dismissive of me, and that does not help my situation.
       
      • Hug Hug x 11
    2. Mary97

      Mary97 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      05/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Accoustic trauma but diagnosed with otosclerosis
      I'm so sorry for what you are going through. I have been dealing with tinnitus and hyperacusis for 4 years (from acoustic trauma) but now diagnosed with otosclerosis.

      Even the normal sound of a car door closing gives me a borderline panic attack so I would absolutely feel the same as you do metal slamming on concrete...

      I was a stressed mess for a long time but everything I read about any supplements that are good for tinnitus, I take it! I now take about 15 different things and it may seem ridiculous but they have all been beneficial to some degree and I am able to cope much better.

      If you're interested, I can give you my list or there is a thread about supplements.

      I just read about Vinpocetine. Some say it's a miracle cure. I just ordered it, haven't started taking it yet so I can't say. It all adds up but I think it's worth it.

      And definitely cheaper than 10,000 euros. In the meantime, my heart goes out to you...
       
      • Like Like x 1
    3. Matchbox
      Wishful

      Matchbox Member

      Location:
      BC Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      08/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise Induced, Prednisone (drones), Barotrauma (distortions)
      Not trying to hijack the thread, but what does your tinnitus sound like? Worse in the morning? Any drone sounds? Both ears? Does yawning impact it in the morning? Or does exercise make a difference?
       
    4. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      object16
      Magical

      object16 Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      1988
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      overuse of hearing protection, plus noise
      Hi, it is a high pitch constant in both ears, approx 3000 Hz.

      Yawning has no effect, vigorous exercise seems to temporarily make it worse. It is usually a bit better in the morning if I manage to get any decent sleep. And I take around 6 different sedatives.

      I am a mess right now.
       
      • Hug Hug x 4
    5. ajc

      ajc Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      11/2002; spike 2009; worse 2017-18
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loud music - noise damage
      • Good Question Good Question x 1
    6. Óscar PP
      Psychedelic

      Óscar PP Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      Nov 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Coronavirus
      Hey, let us know how the Vinpocetine works!
       
    7. AliasM
      Depressed

      AliasM Member

      Location:
      Australia
      Tinnitus Since:
      09/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Botched lumbar puncture, CSF leak
      I hope you are doing better.
       
    8. roy1159
      Suicidal

      roy1159 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      NIHL from working in a noisy cafe' for 2 years
      Don't be sorry for the negativity. We severe sufferers have no reason to be positive after suffering tremendously for so long and without any treatment.

      I agree it degenerates cognitive abilities very much.

      I hope that whatever you do can mend your suffering. I'll probably end it soon myself.

      In the next life I hope we can have a better destiny than this shithole forced on us.
       
      • Hug Hug x 1
    9. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      object16
      Magical

      object16 Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      1988
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      overuse of hearing protection, plus noise
      I'm just sticking it out.

      The tinnitus is perhaps marginally better. Even though THC is known to be bad, I took some anyways, which was also stupid. THC hits me like a narcotic and I have a dream one day the THC side effects will go away.

      I have a friend growing a CBG strain, who knows, there is also THCV and CBDV, my friend has access to these seeds, they take a while to grow out, but wouldn't it be a shame if they worked and I wasn't around anymore.

      Anyways I'm concentrating better at work and there is a new project we are starting and I want to see it through to the end. It is a two year project, so I have to stick it out, even though I wish I was at pearly gates it seems there is still more for me to do.

      I know people worse off, I'm just looking for some positivity, someone please tell me I've rekindled and spiked it and my brain is trying to recover, which it normally does.

      I'm just freaked out and afraid.

      Unfortunately I have too much to live for. I've planted flowers, I have horticultural projects, my boss doesn't care if I come in late, one of our new employees is very positive, and she wrote a research paper on medical assistance in dying with dignity, my family relationships are improving, my son likes me better, my skills are needed at work.

      So please someone tell me a spike from one loud bang usually gets better.

      Besides, I even have a Lenire device, I don't always use it when my tinnitus is spiked, my wife says to use it.
       
      • Hug Hug x 1
    10. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      object16
      Magical

      object16 Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      1988
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      overuse of hearing protection, plus noise
      I stick it out, advice to end it all was politely declined, just because I feel like that does not mean I require encouragement to end it all.

      It's four months later and the spike has largely settled.

      So if anyone gets a spike, don't worry about waiting it out. I recommend, from my own experience, wait it out. They are frustrating, but the more you let yourself get annoyed, the worse you make it for yourself. I went on another thread, and people actually mock me.

      Like hey dudes, I'm a patron and sponsor, I've been member here forever, I know the meaning of pain, I know the meaning of devastation, I also know the meaning of perseverance, and I know the value of understanding your illness. We are just human, and human can give up if isolated and lacking support. I come here for warmth support and help with psychological aspect.
       
      • Hug Hug x 4
      • Like Like x 2
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