Need Help. Positivity Only Please. How Do I Deal with These Thoughts?

Discussion in 'Support' started by jhl, Sep 7, 2018.

    1. jhl

      jhl Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      october 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      who knows
      Hi all, have had it for about 10 months and for some reason it’s really affecting me lately. A couple things I wanted to ask.

      - I have periods where I feel good for a week, then the thoughts take over and I feel bad for a week. So on and so forth. Is this normal with habituation or what. I even remember a time in the past where I probably wouldn’t have even bothered to drive to the doctors if they had a cure. But now I’m dealing with it REALLY poorly

      -How do I deal with the thoughts of “permanent torture, gonna be like this forever”etc. I keep telling myself I won’t feel like this forever, but on the other hand tinnitus is permanent

      - Can anyone with OCD or Anxiety issues who have habituated give me any words of advice?

      - Does anyone when they go out in public just wonder if the people they’re looking at have tinnitus and wonder if they’re struggling with it? Dealing with “why me” thoughts

      - Does anyone else think about it even when they can’t hear it?

      Thank you

      Please try to keep the negativity away from this post, reading stuff online has only made it worse for me.
      • Hug Hug x 2
    2. Luman

      Luman Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Intermittent Tinnitus probably noise induced
      I am not fully habituated, but I'm getting there slowly but surely, as most people do. I have had plenty of anxiety and obsessive thoughts about it, but I've been thinking about it less and less, which is a great relief.

      The difficulty for those with OCD, whether they have tinnitus or not, is living with uncertainty. A good therapist who treats OCD could help, or perhaps try a self-help book on the subject.

      There are some new and very promising techniques for defusing troublesome thoughts. Although it does not address tinnitus itself, I'd recommend a self-help book that I just picked up the other day, The Illustrated Happiness Trap, which uses Acceptance and Commitment Therapy techniques, in an easy to understand format - but it does require work on the part of the reader, in order to reap the benefits.
      Last edited: Sep 7, 2018
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    3. billie48

      billie48 Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      not sure
      You are just being normal for being emotionally up and down with tinnitus, as you are still relatively new with your T. Many people went through this phase. That is sometimes called setback here. In my first 2 years, I have had many setbacks. The brain is just not used to nor hardened to the ringing sensation. I used to cave into an emotional black hole every time T spiked. But nowadays, me and my brain don't give a dime about T, high or low, and I go about enjoying my life. The body takes a while and so don't rush yourself and don't compare with others.

      Tinnitus is not permanent for some folks. Read the success stories and you will see that people can have their T fade or disappear totally. Besides, even if it stays, your perception of it will change for the better over time, as your brain gets more used to it. I used to think like you and I suffered a lot because of it thinking I could never handle T. But today, T can go to hell and it can't extract an oz of negative emotions from me. I kick its butt. It is now just a paper tiger even though it is still there loud and blasting most morning. But with me and my brain don't give a dime, it soon faded out of my consciousness when I get busy.

      Anxiety is one problem I have dealt with most of my life. I suffered decades of anxiety and panic disorder as well as PTSD prior to T & H. So I know what you are going through. If a person with my weak nerves can overcome and now living a normal, happy, productive and absolutely enjoyable life, have faith that you can too. Remember to give your body enough time. Try read up as many success stories as you can to keep things positive and try to stay calm. Take good care. God bless.

      ps. If you have the time, check out my success story where I share many helpful strategies which have helped my turnaround.

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    4. another sean

      another sean Member Benefactor Ambassador Advocate

      Los Angeles
      Tinnitus Since:
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Long duration of low audio
      Hi jhl,

      So it seems you aren't fully habituated yet. And that's OK. It can take time. and maybe anxiety and OCD is getting in the way of that so I highly recommend you seek help for the OCD and Anxiety as they can spiral out of control if left alone. I myself had anxiety panic disorder and hints of OCD. I'd been seeing a therapist for it and it helped immensely. I can't stress that enough. You need to find someone you can unload all those thoughts and then get constructive helpful advice in return. Preferable a therapist who specializes in CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy). Thats exactly the kind you need and they can really deal with those things precisely. But if you cant find a CBT, even a MFT therapist can help. Thats all I was able to find and it was still helpful. And as a supplemental, try to get a copy of the book Stop Obsessing! (the exclamation is in the title, I'm not trying to yell :)) That is a CBT oriented book written by two doctors who really know their stuff. Clearly laid out exercise you can follow. It's not just a bunch of theory. Its real help. Also try to get on some calming supplements to help chill out those thoughts. GABA promoting. Manage the issue on all fonts and you will start feeling a lot better, sooner.
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    5. coffee_girl

      coffee_girl Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      All my life, but got worse 2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced / Concert
      I always tell myself: 'What ifs' don't make sense because anything can happen...what if i died in a car crash tomorrow? What if I Forgot to turn off the stove and the fire burns down my house? What if I went blind while also having T? There are so many what ifs in the world that to concentrate on them is pointless, we can all die at any given time. If I do live until 90 then that is a feat on to itself, and whether T is there at that age or not...the better achievement is that I managed to live that long with good health and happy memories. There is no cure for T so you will either have to accept that you have it or live forever in turmoil and sadness, it's there...nothing will change it at the why not just embrace and live your life to the best of your potential? The alternative is depression and sadness...both of which will only make your T worse and worse, being happy is a choice and it can't hurt in this case.

      Just things i have told myself on the road to recovery =]
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