New and Need a Starting Point

Discussion in 'Support' started by FlyFish, Mar 11, 2014.

tinnitus forum
    1. FlyFish

      FlyFish Member

      Location:
      Western US
      Tinnitus Since:
      10/2012
      I inadvertently posted this in the ear pain forum so moved it here….

      Thanks in advance for reading this long post.

      I have always been a somewhat anxious and high-strung person…incessant worry, etc. but at the same time an over-achiever. In the fall of 2012 I had a variety of setbacks at work that began to manifest themselves as insomnia that was difficult to treat, even with Ambien. On October 30, 2012 at approx 10:20AM my tinnitus kicked on. I always had a tiny bit in my left ear but this was different, like a refrigerator motor humming.

      My ENT did the whole work-up and full battery of testing and concluded no known cause. He prescribed Xanax while I waited until January 2013 for a psychiatrist and counseling appointment (neither Dr has tinnitus experience). By the time those appointments came I was in extraordinary despair and barely functioning. I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression and have been prescribed a variety of medications, some which helped temporarily, but with no consistent relief beyond a day or two at a time (Cymbalta, Pristiq, Lexapro and now Celexa). I had genetic testing done in August 2013 which revealed that my body will only metabolize a few of the ADs and that I am poor responder to all SSRIs. This explains the lack of relief and awful physical side effects I have on these medications. I do take Trazodone at night and Klonopin in order to sleep. Currently, Celexa is causing such severe muscle and joint pain that I can no longer exercise…although my chiropractor does believe I am really out of whack. Vitamins, supplements, etc are worthless in helping my tinnitus. The bottom line is looking for relief from the anti-depressant and ant-anxiety medications has proven futile.

      Meditation, quite music, biofeedback, diet, etc. have had no impact on my tinnitus. It is sort of the chicken and egg thing…anxiety came first, then tinnitus, now tinnitus has become anxiety. I do occasionally have days where it is totally gone with no pattern or explanation. It gets worse when I lie down and I always have it when I wake up. If it is not gone by 9AM it stays with me for the day…which is most days. It is competitive in nature meaning ambient noise does not help, it ramps up to compete…I am one of the few who do better in a quite environment. It used to be in my left ear only, now I sometimes get it in both. My hearing is great, very acute actually.

      Tinnitus controls my life, which has little quality left. My mind continually checks, assesses and monitors the signal. On those rare instances when it is gone, I am at total peace. There is no way anyone can understand this condition unless they have it, which brings me here. I would rather have cancer or some other malady which I could at least fight with a known drug that would give me a fighting chance.

      I have decided to stop focusing on anxiety treatments and treat the tinnitus instead. It is not going away. I need to get some professional help from a counselor or therapist that is trained in how to deal with this and start whatever habituation or retraining therapy is needed. My crappy insurance will not pay for Neuromonics or maskers but I think the VA does, so will explore that option.

      I am not resource constrained at the moment and will get on a jet and travel to wherever I need to get see a top rated specialist. I live near Denver. Any suggestions? Thanks so much for your time.
       
    2. Isabella 123
      Curious

      Isabella 123 Member

      Location:
      Arlington VA
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2013
      There's a lot of help and empathy on this forum. There are avenues to take to look for possible causes that can be remedied. I hope you will spend some time with all these friends here and you'll get lots of help. They are more than friends, they are our family. Good luck on this journey.
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
    3. jewellanne1010

      jewellanne1010 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      06/1999
      I have days were my t is quiet to you learn to enjoy the good days and take the bad days sometimes hour by hour or minute by minute. I would find a support group in your area having a forum here is nice but its great to see people face to face to. I traveled 2hours away from home to attend one. It was well worth it you don't feel so alone.
       
    4. I who love music
      Cheerful

      I who love music Member

      Location:
      Michigan
      Tinnitus Since:
      mid seventies
      Wow, you have quiet times? Wish I did.
      Hey, 40 years of T and I just found something great!!!! Someone here suggested it.
      I went from spooky, anxious, and obsessed with T to basically happy go lucky.
      I'll tell you right off the bat, mine is loud, both ears, and I don't know how in the world I've put up with it pretty much all my life. I guess I haven't felt this good in a long time... here's why. I learned how to turn away from the sounds. I can't say I don't hear it, but I hear it far less. Because, WHEN I hear it, I ask myself, "How do I feel... or... What is my response? Instead of "My T is loud, .. it's louder than this morning... or whatever. I do NOT gauge the T. I gauge my response. If I catch myself listening TO it, or FOR it.... I immediately shift.. and ask myself, "So, what is your response."
      Thinking back, it was an all day thing, thinking,"Oh it's ringing with high overtones....It's louder on the right side today....etc.. and actually being in a loud public place and stopping to listen for it until I heard it. Nuts, huh? Kinda like having floaters and looking for them all the time. Nuts.
      What a positive difference this has made. Such a simple thing.
       
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