Shooting a Gun (9mm) without Hearing Protection Gave Me Tinnitus, Hyperacusis, and Hearing Loss

Discussion in 'Introduce Yourself' started by sensualmosquito, Jul 11, 2020.

    1. sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      I’m pretty new here, but you all seem to be good folk to talk to about what happened to me a month ago. I’m a 21 y/o male.

      I’m here really because of a dumb decision I made that I’ll have to reconcile with probably the rest of my life: Last month I was with a bunch of people on my friend’s 100 acre property when he pulls out his 9mm pistol and everyone starts shooting without hearing protection. Me, thinking it’s totally fine cause everyone else is doing it, shot 7 rounds without protection. God I wish I could turn back time, because now a month later I have tinnitus, hyperacusis and 50 dB hearing loss in 6-8 kHz in my right ear. Steroids didn’t help at all when this happened either. My left ear is completely fine, but I’m devastated.

      I feel dumb for putting myself in that situation. The interesting part is how I was the only one in our group that suffered long-term damage to my ear too. The ENT told me I might get some of my hearing back but even if I didn’t I wouldn’t notice it too much. I don’t know though since I have moderate loss in such a narrow area and everything now sounds muffled and distorted. It’s crazy to me how such lasting damage could happen so quickly.

      Maybe I should look at it like I’m an experiment, and hope for something like FX-322 or something else to help me. In the mean time I guess I just have to deal with it.

      Any advice to cope with this? I’m trying not to think too much about it because there’s nothing I can do anymore but I’m having trouble.
       
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    2. billie48
      Sunshine

      billie48 Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2009
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      not sure
      Welcome to the forum. Sorry that you are suffering. You have our empathy as most of us have been where you are. We understand the tough struggle when tinnitus (T) is new, the mad ringing, the stress, the ups and downs, the fear for the uncertain future, anxiety, panic, depression, sleeplessness etc. etc. What you are going through is quite normal for new sufferers. So don't worry and don’t despair. You are not alone. Things will improve and good life can be back.

      A few years back I went through 'hell' with my ultra high pitch dog whistle T. It seems much worse than a dentist drill. It cuts through everything. I could hear it above the jet noise inside during flights and even above the sound of the raging & roaring rapids in the salmon rivers I fish. Worst, as if my sufferings weren’t enough, T was soon followed by severe hyperacusis. H turned all normal sounds glassy and piercingly hurtful to the ears and all sounds seem too loud to bear. I had to wear ear plugs but the plugs blocked off all outside masking sounds, making the T scream so much more unbearable. There is no lesser choice among them and there is no escape. Worst still, being someone suffering with prior history of anxiety & panic disorder, T & H literally triggered and opened the flood gate of hell of relentless anxiety & panic attacks with their own set of horrible symptoms. These attacks combined with the suffering of T & H were so unlivable that I doubted if I could survive them for life. I was turned into a physical and mental wreck for months. It was a super tough time, but I manage to survive and overcome T & H with the help of forum support & learning some insights & strategies. Like many others, I wrote my success story and mention some important points and strategies. For brevity, if you are interested to read how I turn around my life, here is the link:

      https://www.tinnitustalk.com/thread...w-i-recovered-from-tinnitus-hyperacusis.3148/

      If the ringing really bothers you then perhaps consider using masking sounds to help. There are sound machines and phone apps for tinnitus masking. If you have trouble sleeping, try melatonin.

      Take care. God bless.
       
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    3. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      It all came to a head about 2 weeks ago, when I got home from a 14 hour shift at the hospital. I got home exhausted, and went to bed late at night. All I could hear was the ringing in my right ear- and everything coming from this ear sounded muffled and distorted. I remember in that moment coming to a true realization of the harm I had done to myself, and I couldn't take it anymore. I started crying all night long, wishing I could go back in time to when my hearing was normal, superb even... When I could wear headphones, and hear my music crisply and in its real form. And I just went and threw it away because I trusted my friends more than I trusted myself. I look back to the day it happened, and see all of the things I did wrong, how close I was to avoiding this because of one or two decisions I made... it's maddening. How close I was to going home... It hurts so much to thing about. I know things could be worse, and I have my left ear which is totally normal, but I have yet to make my peace with this. I think it will take a long time for me to, and it helps for me to think about other things and keep myself occupied. I appreciate your words and I'm sorry that you and so many others have gone through situations like this. I hope that one day there will be something out there, a treatment or something, that lessens the suffering. I for one are planning to get involved in the (hopefully) next clinical trial of FX-322. I messed up my ear on accident, so I might as well let it get experimented on for science.
       
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    4. Ryan Jones
      Curious

      Ryan Jones Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Maybe wood saw noise
      I had H too when my T first started. My T and H was also caused by noise trauma. In my opinion the H was the worst.

      After a few months the H went away and only my high pitched T remains which I can manage to ignore most of the time and have gotten back to mostly normal life.

      You’re only a month in. I think the chances are high that your H will go away and your T will start to fade. Try to stay positive.

      best of luck and God bless.
       
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    5. Ryan Jones
      Curious

      Ryan Jones Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Maybe wood saw noise
      Also it is especially important to protect your ears these first few months. Ears take a long time to heal. Wear ear protection, foam plugs, etc if your going to be around any loud noise.

      probably just go ahead and buy a bag of 3M foam plugs to keep with you.

      I keep them everywhere now, so I’m always prepared
       
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    6. Paul Wilson
      Nerdy

      Paul Wilson Member

      Location:
      Georgia
      Tinnitus Since:
      1989
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      One way I cope with my tinnitus is listening to white noise on Youtube. Usually the Ativan I take keeps it at a very bearable level, but sometimes it'll get louder and I'll listen to the sound of a rain storm or sounds of waves on the beach on Youtube. And don't worry about advertisements. While most Youtube vids have commercials throughout, many of the white noise videos only have commercials at the beginning and end, with 4-12 hours of uninterrupted sound. Just listen to different white noises and see what helps to mask the noise best.

      Also, if you're a gamer, it can help to play a game you're really into with a good set of headphones on. Most games seem to keep some kind of noise going almost constantly, and can help a great deal to get your mind off of your tinnitus. BUT only do this if your doctor okays it. My tinnitus isn't caused by damage due to loud noises like yours. Considering how new your hearing problems are, you may need to take precautions so that your ears can heal (if they can, and they very well may).

      Also see a psychiatrist if your emotions get the best of you, or if you just can't get any sleep due to the constant noise. A good psychiatrist can help a lot in these regards.

      Talking to friends and family, and posting on forums like this, about your problems can be helpful, too. It won't quiet the tinnitus, but getting problems off your chest often helps psychologically.

      And if you're a spiritual person, things like prayer and going to church can benefit you psychologically.

      Finally, I've read that following a certain diet can help with tinnitus. Try cutting back or quitting caffeine, nicotine, and sugar. Sometimes things that stimulate your nervous system can make the tinnitus worse.

      If I think of anything else I'll post again. Hope you find whatever helps you cope. I know it seems impossible now, but you can overcome.
       
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    7. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      I just recently lost a portion of my hearing in my right ear and accompanying tinnitus and hyperacusis and I'm realizing that every time I come from work or try to talk with my friends afterward I start crying. I miss being able to hear normally, and I hate how easy it would have been for me to avoid all of this if I didn't listen to peer pressure. I have many headphones and now I can't use any of them. I keep looking at my audiogram. 50 dB hearing loss 8-6kHz... It keeps sinking in. I try to forget about it then my ear rings and hurt and distort sounds... I feel like I'm in hell. I need to sleep...
       
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    8. Ctw
      Tired

      Ctw Member

      Location:
      CT
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
    9. Tweedleman
      Depressed

      Tweedleman Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      2001
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown/Noise
      I've been going through the same hell. I went to an absurdly loud indoor metal concert without earplugs. Listened to my friend instead of myself, and now I'm paying for it for the rest of my life. Fully understand your pain brother.

      It seems impossible to do right now, but you have to forgive yourself. Most people don't realize how damaging these things can be because there is a critical lack of hearing damage awareness in society. Especially when it comes to guns; you've probably seen dozens of TV shows where characters fire guns with no ear protection and suffer no apparent repercussion. You didn't forsee this happening.

      Hearing can sometimes recover, so try to stay hopeful and protect the crap out of your ears. After the concert I was down 25 dB between 500 and 2000 Hz, but over the past 6 months those notches have improved to 10 dB. My hearing still isn't what it once was, but I'll take any improvement.

      You are going through a mourning process, as am I. Not a day has passed that I haven't dwelled. I've found that the best way to help expedite the process is to take the experience as a lesson and try to re-emerge as a different, tougher person. Your life has changed and the only way to not be consumed by it is to roll with the punches and move forward. Looking back is counterproductive. Try to make some changes that might enable you to spin a positive out of a horribly negative situation.

      I highly recommend taking NAC. It is a key ingredient in the Hough Pill and research has shown it can help attenuate noise damage. Also try astaxanthin, it's a powerful antioxidant that has helped some of us here and is great for your eyes.

      Even if your ears don't improve at all, and I do think they will to some degree, remember that we have FX-322, the Hough Pill, PIPE-515, OTO-413, and regenerative medicine as a whole to look forward to. You WILL get some if not all of your hearing back one day.

      Shoot me a message if you need to vent or talk. We're here for you!
       
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    10. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      I'm glad you mentioned NAC. Interesting thing was I bought NAC online 2 days before this happened for my asthma, and started taking it every day pretty much since this happened, minus the day after. I also took Magnesium, CoQ10, Acetyl-L-Carnitine and Prednisone (30 hours after injury) and did hyperbaric oxygen therapy for a few days (couldn't afford 10 days straight) and now I'm doing acupuncture. I'm doing everything I can to maximize recovery if possible, so hopefully I'll see some improvement. At the very least I want my tinnitus and hyperacusis to dissipate.

      I also know that regenerative therapy is advancing rapidly. I hope that works out soon, so many of us can feel the joy of restoration.

      Thanks for the support, really. It's been tough for me, coming home from work just to start crying. I don't want the pain the envelop my life.
       
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    11. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      I will never leave the house without earplugs anymore. I also bought a big pair of earmuffs for my car. I'll protect my ears religiously from here on out.
       
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    12. WillBeNimble
      Buzzed

      WillBeNimble Member Podcast Patron Benefactor

      Location:
      Ohio
      Tinnitus Since:
      2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic Damage from earphones
      Well, that might cause Hyperacusis. You do want to protect your hearing yes, but don't go overboard. Sound defenders, which block out sound louder than 85db in the car should work.
       
    13. Falchion

      Falchion Member

      Location:
      Utrecht, Netherlands
      Tinnitus Since:
      07/05/20
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Hammer drill
      Man, I totally feel that anger you feel at yourself. I just picked up a power drill for less than 10 minutes and voila, here's your screwed up ear. Mine doesn't sound as bad as yours, but I *totally* feel you. Hang in here bro, we are all here for you.
       
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    14. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      I get this feeling like my brain is unconsciously focusing on the normal sounding stimuli being received from my good ear rather than the garbled mess of my right ear. Right now I'm listening to a song (at low volume of course) and it sounds like the normal sounds are more "in the center" of sound sensation, if that makes sense. Anyone else have something like this? I have unilateral hearing loss, recruitment and tinnitus in my right ear but somehow my left side escaped without symptoms aside from occasional tinnitus lasting a few seconds.
       
    15. Tom 2020

      Tom 2020 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      06/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Shotgun Noise
      I hope you are feeling better. I have described my similar situation. How are you feeling now?
       
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    16. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      It's been almost 3 months now since this happened, and things seem maybe a little better? It's hard to tell. I have good days and worse days. What annoys me the most is the distortion of sound and the tinnitus. I think to myself that if those two things were manageable I'd be fine, even with the hearing loss. I just want things to sound more clear. That would make the difference for me. I'm trying to be patient and protect what I have with plugs if needed and NAC, magnesium and all that. I get annoyed that I can't really wear headphones because of this, and I hope one day I can. I have like 4 pairs of headphones and now they're basically expensive decorations in my room.

      One thing I've noticed is that when I'm driving on the highway, the vibration from my car messes with my ear, giving me this sound almost like the gain in my ear is too high. I hope this fades because it's pretty annoying too. I would imagine my auditory gain is elevated which is causing this distortion and stuff. We'll see what happens, and hopefully I'll be able to see relief or real treatment while I'm still in my 20s.

      I read a little bit about your story, which is similar to mine. How are things now?
       
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    17. Tom 2020

      Tom 2020 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      06/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Shotgun Noise
      Thanks for writing back. I went to three ENT/ear doctors and there is so little known about this. All three doctors admitted they didn't have patients who experienced gunshot blasts. After 9 weeks since my acoustic trauma from the gunshot blast, I overall feel that each week, all the symptoms get slightly better. The most disturbing feeling I have is that my ears felt clogged for weeks. But I am astonished that few doctors have experience with this. I wonder if we should try to find doctors who deal the war veterans? I need some sleep now, but my overall feeling is that it is so slowly getting better. But, since I can't find doctors who have patients with gunshot acoustic trauma, I feel like I can only ask people here how they feel.
       
    18. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      It's been 3 months and a week since that fateful day that I shot a 9mm pistol and damaged my ears, giving me a nice 6k hearing loss in my right ear. Things seem to be getting better, albeit VERY slowly. My ear does better in the morning, and I often wake up without really noticing the tinnitus. Depending on what I eat, how much I eat/sleep/exercise, it will be better or worse. If I don't eat a whole lot throughout the day, and I'm not too stressed (I work in an ER) and keep away from too much salt the ringing tends to be more manageable. It comes and goes really, although I do have to say that it is improving. The most annoying thing that I'm experiencing is the distortion in noises; more so than the 50 dB loss, and more than the ringing now! From what I have read from others who have experienced this, this usually fades away with time. I hope one day to be able to use headphones again (I acknowledge the danger associated with that, but I don't know if I could live without them, given my attachment to sound. I am looking into wearable speakers like the Bose Soundwear though too as a possible alternative). I may have to wait until a solid solution to hearing loss arises, but I think I can be patient.

      When this first happened to me, I was beside myself with anxiety and fear. I couldn't believe that this happened to me, and in some ways I still can't. However, I have come more to terms with this new normal, lame as it is. It felt like a mourning process, almost like losing a friend or family member. After all, I lost part of myself, which is not a fun feeling to have. However, I know that I have to keep going on with my life, and pursue my career in nursing (one day I hope to be a CNP or CRNA). I know my situation will improve over time, and there will one day be a treatment/cure for this, even if I have to wait years/decades.

      Anyways, thanks for reading. I hope you're having a great day, and I look forward to a day where nobody has to deal with what so many of us are dealing with now.
       
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    19. Tom 2020

      Tom 2020 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      06/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Shotgun Noise
      I have been busy at work. It's hard to check here. I suffered acoustic trauma on June 28, 2020. It's getting better, but what a crazy and slow road. All different ear sensations. I wish there was a thread for gunshot noise to compare sensations.
       
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    20. linearb
      Psychedelic

      linearb Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      beliefs are makyo and reality ignores them
      Tinnitus Since:
      1999
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      karma
      check out forums for gun owners, they are full of stories of acoustic trauma and hearing loss, obviously. (They're also mostly full of racist insanity and QAnon bad takes, yay America)

      9mm is right on the edge of what I think is reasonable to fire with hearing protection.
       
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    21. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      It's been a little over 5 months now, and I've gotta say that I haven't noticed a whole lot of change since I last wrote in here 3 months ago. Some days it feels like my hearing is better, but only for a moment. It's probably more in my head (literally and figuratively lol).

      I have another ENT appointment on Dec. 8th, so we'll see.

      My right ear still pops a lot, to my annoyance. I'm glad I can still listen to music, although I'm a lot more careful, and I don't use headphones anymore which sucks. I'm hoping for a cure or treatment in the future (hopefully sooner rather than later)! I've been following FX-322, which seems very promising, but you never know. They could put out a 90-day report in March and tell everyone they failed, or it gave someone super cancer or something. I'm hopeful though. Things still usually sound more muffled, and there's much less filtering of sound when there's a lot of sounds at the same time. My left ear also rings much more than it used to (before that fateful June night) and I hope it doesn't get worse. Most of the time it's not there in the left, but it comes on occasion. My right ear, for whatever reason, got the worst of it. Although it's still not optimal, it seems like my hearing, at least when I test it, is better than it used to, if not only a little bit. I know it takes a lot of time, so I just need to be more patient. I still feel so much regret; that feeling really sucks. I can still make myself feel like shit just thinking about all the things that lined up for this to happen to me, and how many chances I had to prevent it. I know it's in the past and there's nothing I can do about it, so I need to just move on as best I can.

      To add to all this, I work in an ER and COVID-19 is getting worse and worse for us, which is starting to negatively impact my well-being. I worry I'm gonna give it to my family, since they are basically stuck with someone with a higher than normal probability of contracting it. I think that this, along with my constant schoolwork, has been making my tinnitus worse too. I hope that one day I can look back on this year and say "remember how much that sucked? How shitty your life was at that point? Man I'm so glad things are back to relative normalcy!" I hope anyway. I guess we all do!
       
    22. kyles

      kyles Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      09/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Gun Range
      Hey @sensualmosquito , sorry you are going through this. Stay positive and try not to think about it (harder said than done).

      Mine went about 99% away after two months. But it looks like we had a very similar situation. I did have earplugs in, so yours might take a little longer to fade. Unfortunately, since you have some hearing loss, you will probably have some sort of tinnitus for the rest of your life. That being said, it should fade over time.

      Reach out with any questions.
       
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    23. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      I'm hanging in there, thanks for the kind words. I hope it does fade over time, really. I'm hoping to one day have a solution for this (like FX-322), although it'll probably be a while before I can get my hands on something like that. Maybe by the time I get through nursing school! In the mean time, I'm taking things day by day, as best as I can. I'm certainly more depressed with all this, along with other problems I have in my life right now. I know that one day I'll have more freedom in my life. Things might never be the same for my hearing, but maybe things will be almost normal. I'll take that over my current situation. In retrospect, it could be worse anyway. Could be better, but at least I can sleep with this, and work with this. I still have a life left to live, and I know that. I just have to be patient for things to get better.
       
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    24. twa
      Busy

      twa Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      US
      Tinnitus Since:
      2017- mild /Sept. 2020-moderate
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      meds/acoustic trauma
      Hi,

      There are so many regenerative therapies on the horizon for hearing, vision and other areas like the joints. You are still young and many of these treatments will come out in the next 5 to 10 years. You sound like you are doing a good job of handling this, working and going to school. This is a difficult time to work in an ER. I encourage you to seek out stress reduction strategies and lessen your stress level so your body has the best opportunity to heal. There are some pretty amazing stories of people recovering from gun shot acoustic trauma.

      God bless~
      twa
       
    25. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      Update: I'm about a week out from seeing the ENT again, although I don't see much really changing or happening there.

      What I suspect is that they will tell me my hearing is about the same as it was before, then maybe ask me if I want a hearing aid that my insurance wouldn't dare pay for that'll cost ~2500 dollars, and I'll say no thank you.

      Things haven't changed a whole lot, aside from this strange low pitched tinnitus that sounds like a single low frequency in both of my ears. The weird thing is that I've had that sound in my head for a very long time (years before my gun shooting incident in June 2020) yet it only really showed up when it was really quiet. Like, really quiet. Even after I messed my ear up it wasn't like this. It's still not super loud, but it's become noticeable when things are relatively quiet, yet not as quiet as it needed to be before. It's only been a couple of days since I've really started noticing it so maybe it's due to something else, like not getting enough sleep or being stressed out in general. When it's there it almost feels like my ears are full, and I need to get something out. I hope it's not fluid that's trapped back there, like what happens with Meniere's disease (hydrops). I do have terrible allergies all the time, so there's a potential problem there.

      I'm not entirely sure but I sure hope it doesn't get worse. Although, with the way 2020 is going, it wouldn't surprise me.

      I hope to have my hearing back in time, and I've been especially hopeful for FX-322. I'd give everything I have to have normal ears again.
       
    26. twa
      Busy

      twa Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      US
      Tinnitus Since:
      2017- mild /Sept. 2020-moderate
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      meds/acoustic trauma
      Hi there! I know this is a few months old, but your story reminds me of another member's in the forum. Look up Success Stories and acoustic trauma. I think you'll be encouraged.
      I think we all took our hearing and normalcy in life for granted. The good thing is that you have youth on your side and modern technology. Hopefully, prayerfully, you will benefit from research and development of amazing medical advancements in regenerative medicine.
       
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    27. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      Update: It's been a little over 7 months since this happened to me, and I do have to say things are better than they used to be. Are they great? Far from it; however, they still have improved. My tinnitus is generally at a lower level than it used to be, especially if I take good care of myself and get good sleep. The reactivity of my tinnitus is still quite prevalent, and is by far the most annoying thing about this.

      Having dampened hearing acuity is one thing, but having distortion and tinnitus every time I play the piano or hear a call light at work is much more frustrating. I want to hear what I've got left, not this messed up version of what hearing I have left in my right ear. I also have frequent pains in and around my right ear (headaches and such) which isn't great. The amount of clarity I have in my right ear seems to fluctuate from almost unnoticeable to quite prevalent, with the feeling sometimes getting worse after drinking coffee or consuming anything with sugar. It's quite the strange illness, and I can still feel the regret and see myself in that moment of time when I made the mistakes that brought me here. I feel around my pockets to find my earplugs, and tell myself "man, if only I had these when I needed them the most I wouldn't have to carry these everywhere!"

      I'm trying to stay optimistic though, and see things in a larger perspective. I have hope that my condition will continually improve as it has since the incident occurred, and I look forward to medicines like FX-322, which I refer to as the "ear juice" that'll save me from this condition. Until then, I'll keep dreaming.
       
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    28. arcanesystem
      Disappointed

      arcanesystem Member Benefactor

      Location:
      USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      08/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown; Possibly noise-induced
      Hey, @sensualmosquito! Really sorry to hear that you're having a tough time with your tinnitus. It's really unfortunate that many of us have to face this annoying health issue, and it doesn't help that the possible treatments under development are not going to be available to us quite soon. It often feels like there's nowhere to turn to and it's in moments like this that it's easy to give in to our fears and regrets.

      I am also on the younger side of the population with tinnitus. I unexplainably got mine when I was 20, and looking back, it really felt like my life was over. The scariest thing was definitely the impact of the fear and anxiety - I lost a lot of weight because I wasn't eating, I was scared to sleep, I was always checking on it, and I felt bitter envy towards anyone who was tinnitus free. Ditching that negativity was incredibly difficult, but hear me out. I'm almost four years in with this condition and though I have had some really annoying and unpredictable times with these sounds in my ears (currently having a mean spike, but I'm sloooowly trying to learn how to tame it), I feel as if I have still accomplished and managed so much, including leading a comfortable life, doing the things I love, and pursuing my career. When I read that you're interested in nursing, I got really excited because I'm actually a nursing student right now and am pursuing nurse anesthesia just like you!

      Optimism is a great thing to have with tinnitus. It's important to take care of yourself, so it's a good idea to be mindful of protecting your ears. Get enough sleep, eat healthy, keep your mind off it, and don't forget to continue enjoying life. Please continue to pursue your dreams and take care of yourself. There is no reason why tinnitus should take that away from you!
       
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    29. Brian Newman

      Brian Newman Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Shooting/loud noise
      Hey brother, same thing happened to me. I shot my .223 without ear plugs... I wish it was a 9mm. I got my life back for years it felt so good. I started getting bad hyperacusis and distortions which is dysacusis a few months ago after lifting too heavy in the gym. Just like you every day now I go back and wish I wore those plugs. More than anything.

      It breaks me man. I was only 18 and knew it was bad but did it anyway. To think I could have lived such a good life with no suffering, literally. I had a perfect life until that. I am optimistic about FX-322 as well but don’t want to get overexcited because they haven’t finished Phase 2 trials yet.
       
    30. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      sensualmosquito
      Confused

      sensualmosquito Member

      Location:
      New Mexico
      Tinnitus Since:
      June 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      6-8 khz HL, T and H from gunshots
      Update: It's been... 276 days since this happened, according to the internet (I can't count lol). That would make it about 9 months.

      Crazy to think I've been living with this for so long. I still don't think there has been a day where I haven't thought of it at least once. That said, I've had many more days where I am not thinking it about it that much, and it has been more bearable. I don't think I could say the tinnitus itself has gotten much better since I last wrote here, however I have habituated to it more. It has slowly become more normal to me, although I still regret that one hour that changed so much of my life.

      I still have hope that something like FX-322 will help me significantly, and we'll soon find out soon how effective it is at restoring hearing. I have learned in some senses to live with this, yet I know that if I could have more of a semblance of normal I would be much happier.

      This whole ordeal has changed my perspective about things in many ways, some bad, some strangely good. I found that there were many things in my old life that I took for granted, and all of a sudden boring, inconsequential memories found themselves full of life in my head. I saw that I was actually happy, compared to everything that has happened, and what has been taken away from me. I know that sounds depressing, and in many ways it is, but I've grown to become more comfortable in that. I've become more grateful for what I did have, and that I had a chance to have it for 21 years. And maybe, just maybe, I'll get some of it back.
       
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