Tips for Staying Positive in Adversity? Share Your Encouragement & Suggestions

Hey, TinnitusTalk. I never formally introduced myself since I was worried that by posting here, I was admitting 'defeat' to something. It was stupid- but I think I want to come out of the forest and ask for a bit of help on how I've been feeling, personally.

I've hit a point where it's like a rocking ship. I'll feel fine for twenty minutes, then feel like dying for twenty minutes more. It's a terrible, terrible process, and I know it's not due to some pre-existing psychological condition- I was fine before tinnitus hit, I was dealing with the problems and stress that comes from getting into a new part of my life, but it wasn't something like this. So... where does that leave it? It's in my reaction to negativity and how I react to bad things. It's always something that I've put up with and dealt with when it came to my life; I shut down when the worst seemed to happen.

I've skimmed through a lot of stuff on tinnitustalk. I normally am looking around for positivity- but sometimes I get into a spiral of negativity. I've seen a lot, and, while the vast majority doesn't apply to me- I've picked up on this message that for someone to survive Tinnitus, they need to slowly learn to appreciate the good things in life; to be positive.

I don't have that. I give up when things seem impossible, and I've felt myself fight and struggle to act like I'm okay, and for a few minutes- I can feel just fine, but I can feel myself immediately spiral back into feelings of despair and entropy. It's a terrible feeling- but I don't want to continue feeling like this. I don't want to keep feeling like I want to die; I want to live. I want to struggle- but it's hard, it's distressing. I want to push on, but I also know that a part of me is holding my arm and whispering to me, "Why go on? Why even try? You know it's pointless."

..I guess I've kind of went on a spiel, and I'm sorry if it's a vast word dump- but I guess what I'm asking here is for you guys to let me know I'm going to be okay. I'll get through it. I can see a sun rising at some point, and I can smile at it; because I've tried to carry myself on, and I've not been able to get through it alone. If you guys have any tips for staying positive in adversity, throw them at me. I want to hear your encouragement and suggestions- I want to find a new way to go forward and be happy, even if life has gotten worse- and I wanted to hear it from people I think know how to struggle with something that the wider world isn't even aware of.

Thanks for looking at the thread. I know it's a strange request, and, I don't mean to be annoying if that comes off- I really didn't want to reach out like this, but I figured that I needed to do something for my wellbeing instead of an apathetic consignment to suffering in silence.

 

You have the right attitude to be positive with tinnitus @LostSpartan, I believe it's one of the best ways of moving forward with this condition and getting on with your life. However, being able to do this takes time so try not to be too hard on yourself, because you are in the early stages of tinnitus.

Most of my posts on my started threads are based on positivity and are a form of counselling that I will mention below. Please print them rather than reading on a phone or computer screen, that way you will absorb and retrain the information better. It is a lot to read so take your time and refer to them often. With time you will start to feel more positive and realize you can still enjoy a fulfilling life doing all the things that you want to do, as many people do that live with tinnitus.

Since your tinnitus is noise induced, my advice is not to use any type of headphones even at low volume. More about this is explained in the posts below. When you are ready go to my started threads and read:

New to Tinnitus What to Do? Tinnitus, A Personal View, Hyperacusis, As I See It, The Habituation Process, How to Habituate to Tinnitus, Tinnitus and the Negative Mindset, Acquiring a Positive Mindset, Will My Tinnitus Get Worse? Tinnitus and Negative Counselling, Is Positivity Important? Inspiration, From Darkness Into Light, Tinnitus and Mental Health.

Take care,
Michael

 

Help is coming and research is due very soon from a number of companies that will help. Summer 2022 is going to be big for news. Here is the list:

Susan Shore - anytime from April onwards Phase 2 results (final phase)

XEN1101 - second quarter 2022 - Mt Sinai Depression results

Ebselen - August 2022 - COVID-19 trial results

Otonomy - second quarter 2022 - Phase 2 results

Frequency Therapeutics news will be news from FX-322 once trial 208 Phase 2 is finished and also results from Phase 1B of FX-345. This will be end of 2022, early 2023.

DBS - numerous trials underway. No idea when they are concluding.

Neuralink - Should see implants going to human trials in 2022, after that it is an unknown.

As Londoncalling says, AI powered by supercomputing will solve this easily in the mid term. A couple of things are working in that favour. Dynamic MRI machines, AI, and the fact that we currently have supercomputer power of about 2 Exaflops. That will increase to 1 Zetaflop by 2027/2028. That is an increase that is hard to fathom. That doesn't even take into account breakthroughs in Quantum computing.

Help is coming!

 

What helped and still helps me is believing that every day I’m moving forward towards getting better. It’s a day by day ordeal and very small wins here and there. Sleeping for 2 hours straight, then maybe 3 hours etc. I believe the key is to never loose hope and keep pulling through.

 

Hi @LostSpartan, I can totally relate to your feelings as I experience the same push-and-pull between feeling OK vs. complete despair on an hourly basis, and it seems the cause of our tinnitus is similar (loud music). Although I can’t offer too much as far as escaping that feeling of wanting to disappear yet so desperately wanting to live, as I am currently deeply in the throes of that same struggle, I can only share some things that keep me going.

Take this time to revel in the enjoyment of some things you may have enjoyed but left behind in your life at some point, even if it’s just a means to pass the time. For me, I’m trying to find comfort in rewatching older sitcoms I’d watched as a kid (Cheers, All in the Family, Sanford & Son, I Love Lucy, etc.) through a different lens as I’m now older and more likely to get the various jokes and pop culture references. I find it entertaining to revisit these shows (at a low TV volume) and it certainly beats staring at the wall ruminating on all the regretful decisions that brought on my tinnitus.

You can also try to squeeze the most possible enjoyment out of any activity that doesn’t involve sound, such as enjoying a nice takeout meal or engaging in a relaxing craft or hobby. I just bought a model ‘55 Chevy Cameo kit to build which is something I never would’ve done before this whole mess, since I was too absorbed in music to do much of anything else. I haven’t even opened the thing yet, but I’m at least looking forward to cracking it open and getting started on building it. I also purchased a couple DVD sets of silent movies from the American film archives to try and pursue silent film history as some sort of entertaining hobby.

Not sure if this is of any help, but it’s what I got for now. Also take some comfort in knowing you are absolutely not alone in this hell, and the fact that there are some pretty exciting developments in the pipeline to possibly give us our lives back (FX-322/345, OTO-313/413, etc.)

Hang in there brother!

 

@LostSpartan, maybe this thread will help:

Back to Silence

George

 

Staying busy gets me out of that despair you mentioned. With me, it feels like fear at times, especially the times when my ear ringing gets real loud. I've had to basically rearrange my entire life around my tinnitus. Reading the news online and avoiding social media is a big thing for me. Much of it is very negative, it often seems like fear is purposely being generated from both. Meditation helps me too, gets me out of my mind and back in the present moment.

Living in a senior apt building and seeing so many elderly people that are dealing w/ a lot of serious things as they approach the end of their lives has helped put it into perspective. There are some things that help me deal w/ tinnitus, at least temporarily, but for someone struggling w/ cancer, COPD, Alzheimer's, etc, there is little or no help available.