- May 29, 2018
- 1,161
- Tinnitus Since
- 10/2017
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Neck/stress
I made a slightly dark joke whilst drunk that was removed for being inappropriate. It basically touted inflicting simulated tinnitus on depressives as a cure. A glimpse in to true permanent suffering to effectively rid one of a curable malaise of the spirit. A grass is greener effect. I do think this has genuine grounds for research. But on reflection I have realised the point I was trying to make is as follows.....
I've noticed particularly in regards to my older brother that my tinnitus has given him a significant boost in terms of happiness and taking care of his health. He obviously 'pities' me but my observation is that as my spirit, health and soul succumb to this dreadful affliction, his life by comparison now suddenly seems so much better. The sheer relief that it's not him and i was the one that got tinnitus has given him a new lease of life. Similarly my best friend seems to be perkier to say the least and although again 'pitying' me, his small woes now seem minuscule to say the least. I have effectively been like some sort of pick me up or tonic to them.
Sadly this makes me even more depressed. Not because I want them to be miserable but because it's hard to watch them being given this incredible life affirming boost by something that is dragging me to hell in a handcart.
I've noticed particularly in regards to my older brother that my tinnitus has given him a significant boost in terms of happiness and taking care of his health. He obviously 'pities' me but my observation is that as my spirit, health and soul succumb to this dreadful affliction, his life by comparison now suddenly seems so much better. The sheer relief that it's not him and i was the one that got tinnitus has given him a new lease of life. Similarly my best friend seems to be perkier to say the least and although again 'pitying' me, his small woes now seem minuscule to say the least. I have effectively been like some sort of pick me up or tonic to them.
Sadly this makes me even more depressed. Not because I want them to be miserable but because it's hard to watch them being given this incredible life affirming boost by something that is dragging me to hell in a handcart.