Hello — New to This, Several Questions, Little Hope.

paganismos

Member
Author
Feb 15, 2018
82
Colombia
Tinnitus Since
02/2018
Cause of Tinnitus
Ear Syringing (Acoustic Trauma)
Hey everyone, and thank you for reading this.

On Monday I went to an appointment with an ENT to get my ears cleaned because I couldn't hear a thing on my left ear, due to an accumulation of cerum (days before I used glycerin and a washer bub used incorrectly to try and take out the wax). I heard a pitch on the left ear which was probably due to the wax, so I shrugged it off and waited for the appointment. There, the ENT told me that syringing had no complications and that it was a procedure with no risks, that could be done then and there. The sound of the syringe wasn't loud and didn't hurt, but it was when the doctor took out a piece of skin that was inside. That hurt A LOT. After walking out of the clinic, I put on my headphones on a normal volume and it wasn't unconfortable. That night, when I lied down, I heard a high pitched sound on my left ear (12,000hZ on 40% volume according to one of those websites). As a person with anxiety, depression and other issues, comming out of a month and a half of several anxiety attacks and depressive episodes, compulsively reading about tinnitus was my go-to. I couldn't sleep that night, I hurt myself and had suicidal thoughts.

Yesterday I went to my GP to get checked, because my left ear was hurting a bit, and also because i still had the high pitched noise. He told me that it was a bit swollen and wrote me a prescription of some ear drops with corticosteroids to help me with the swelling (the ear drops contain neomycin sufalte, dexamethasone, polimixin b and hydroxypropyl methylcellulose). Also told me that the pitch could take a few days to go away, and to get a check up on monday. Last night I put on some white noise and grabbed some sleep. The pitch is not that noticeable anymore, almost even the sound of my computer helps me ignore it. Still, I'm having an appointment with another ENT next tuesday.

After some hope that I might recover, I looked up some of the components in the ear drops and they're ototoxic. I already used them four times, but I'm afraid if I stop, the bacteria that's on there -i don't know if i have an infection- may become resistant and I fuck everything up, please, help me on this?.
Also, I found out that Wellbutrin can cause tinnitus. I've taken wellbutrin 150mg for three years, but never had anything. And shit, I've used headphones for quite a while, going to concerts and gigs without hearing protection. I'm only 20 years old, already feeling hopeless for the rest of my life. I feel guilt, anger, sadness and hopelessness... What if it never goes away? What if it changes the pitch? Everything is so dark for me right now... I see no light. Don't know what caused it. What should I do?

Thank you for reading, I hope to get some sleep tonight.
 
After some hope that I might recover, I looked up some of the components in the ear drops and they're ototoxic. I already used them four times, but I'm afraid if I stop, the bacteria that's on there -i don't know if i have an infection- may become resistant and I fuck everything up, please, help me on this?.

I wouldn't worry too much about this since you don't seem to have any perforation in your ear drum, which means that the drops aren't going to make their way into your middle ear, and therefore no much of a chance for them to reach your inner ear either.

You say that your tinnitus isn't that noticeable anymore, so it looks like it is slowly going away. I'd take that as good news.
 
But what about the Wellbutrin? Three years can fuck your hearing permanently. I don't notice it while awake... When I wrote that I was feeling quite positive. But now... Now I hear it so much louder.
 
Sorry to hear about your tinnitus. You seem to have a few potential causes. In any case, I'd be careful with Wellbutrin. I took it at 150mg XL for 4 weeks with no prob, but the day that I upped it to 300mg XL, I either got tinnitus, or some existing tinnitus that I hadn't noticed was hugely exacerbated. Since then mine has gone up and down, but has gotten a little better. I'd get some rest, take care of your body for a few weeks and see if it goes down.
 
Thank you @dnl. I'm getting off of it cold turkey, i don't care. I never had any ear problems during the three years, which seems weird to me because apparently the tinnitus starts right after taking the first dose. Gah, I don't know. I want to die, honestly. So irresposible of me
 
@paganismos I know that feeling of panic that goes with being new to tinnitus, and I also know the feeling of wondering if you could have prevented it. But please don't over-react and don't beat yourself up about this. You were doing what you needed to to take care of your body/ears/psyche, etc. I've only had tinnitus for about 2 months, it started out pretty rough, but I've habituated a bit, and I've noticed that staying positive helps. If you've been on Wellbutrin for years, I'd talk to your doc about coming off of it, especially if you're having suicidal ideation. Wellbutrin might not be associated with your condition. It's a pretty rare side effect and is sometimes used to help people cope with tinnitus (ironically).
I'd get a support system in place, and be open with others about what you're going through. And really, really, get some good rest/sleep. I think I alternated Benadryl/nyquil for the first week or two to help me sleep, it really helped me deal with the anxiety. It's going to be okay, even if it lasts a long while.
 
Started feeling pressure in my left ear... Not sure why. Don't know if I might be becoming sensitive to sounds. I'm scared, and I know stress makes it worse but ffs, if only I could sleep. Thank you again for the reassurance @dnl, I know it will get better with time, but there's 0 patience on me righf now. I hope everything works out in the end.
 
My goal has been: Even if my tinnitus doesn't get better, I want to get better/healthier in other ways to offset it. So, I've been putting time into small things that I can do to help myself get better... getting sleep, eating right, exercising, even some meditation/focused silence. So while tinnitus has marked a point in my life that has 'hurt' my general well-being, I've also used that same time in my life to do things on a consistent schedule that change my general well-being for the positive.
I hope both you and your tinnitus get better @paganismos
 
@paganismos - talk to your doc about stopping your meds: you may trigger unwanted side effects if you stop cold turkey.

I don't notice it while awake...

Then when do you notice it? It seems very mild from your description before that too: your focus on it may turn something mild into a stressful stimulus and an obsession. Just try to relax and get your mind off of it.
 
@GregCA I honestly don't mind having unwanted side effects if they don't affect my ear, but I already talked to her. It would be so sad that the ear irrigation triggered something that was there before thanks to the Wellbutrin... I shouldn't have cleanded my ear. I prefer that deafness a thousand times more than this... And now, what if the pain and tenderness in my right ear is due to hyperacuosis? Living with two conditions like that it's terrible. I can't imagine my life like this...

I'm sorry, I do notice it while awake, but only when it's quiet and right before I go to sleep. English is not my first language, sorry.

I'll try to calm down. My anxiety is on the roof. Can't keep suicide out of my mind.

Do you think I should wear earplugs?

Thank you for answering ♥
 
I honestly don't mind having unwanted side effects if they don't affect my ear

Well, some side effects can affect your ears. Also, there are other side effects just as nasty as things that can affect your ears. Just talk to your doc for to devise a proper plan. I'm unsure Wellbutrin had anything to do with your T&H though.

It would be so sad that the ear irrigation triggered something that was there before thanks to the Wellbutrin...

I'm dubious about the connection between the two. A few people in here got T from irrigation alone, so you could easily have gotten T from the irrigation alone.

I'm sorry, I do notice it while awake, but only when it's quiet and right before I go to sleep. English is not my first language, sorry.

I would still qualify it as fairly mild. Stay busy during the day to keep your mind off of it. It will help with the anxiety as your T will be "out of mind". You can also use sound enrichment to keep T in the background and out of your mind.

Don't worry about your English.

Good luck!
 
As a person with anxiety, depression and other issues, comming out of a month and a half of several anxiety attacks and depressive episodes, compulsively reading about tinnitus was my go-to. I couldn't sleep that night, I hurt myself and had suicidal thoughts.
It seems like a lot of us with some mental issues like anxiety and panic attacks are more prone to getting tinnitus. Our brains seem to latch onto the noise and not let go. My noise came back with a vengeance this morning after a unusual dream. Years ago when I took Wellbutrin it seemed to ramp up my noise. That drug seems to energize our brain too much and further excite the overactive neurons. My static noise went crazy after I took a Cymbalta the other day and then turned into a high pitched noise. I stopped after 1 or 2 pills. I had a heightened state of hearing yesterday.

This article talks about the gateway in our brain being broken:

https://www.nidcd.nih.gov/news/2011/tinnitus-what-happens-when-brains-gatekeeper-breaks-down
 

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