Holy Cow, Today Was Bad

Ever since I made a follow-up with my audiologist to talk about maskers, I was wondering if I was overestimating my need for them. After all, I'm a very happy person in general, and my tinnitus hasn't caused me any depression or more than middling anxiety (I have issues with that already ). It does make me extremely anxious and short tempered, however... I'm a joy to be around when it gets really bad.

Anyway, today in the middle of the day, I finally reached a point where I was like, crawling out of my skin anxious. I ended up digging through three boxes to find earphones at home so I could listen to something in my phone (blue noise in this case). And then my kids kept pulling them out (they're little), then my phone died.

Maybe maskers aren't such a dumb idea after all

 

Oh hun big hugs.

I know the skin crawling feeling. I live in constant fear of my phone going flat and not being able to access my masking apps

Hope your feeling better tonight xxx

 

I've got hearing aids zero amplification. that way you never run out of luck!

 

I have the same fear freak out if I can't find my head phones or charger. On a our note I really like my pillow speakers.

 

I use white noise generators and never run out of batteries but sometimes I feel I should 'face' the tinnitus and keep calm so that I am facing my phobia in the hope that I'll fear it less. As nothing has worked for the past 6 years I don't think I'm doing so well. I had 3 really good days last week where I was always aware as usual but able to rationalize what was happening and tell myself it was only noise and couldn't hurt me etc,etc and before I knew it I had moved on to other thoughts and forgotten about it. Great. Today I feel like I don't want to live. It started bothering me yesterday (floods of adrenaline, racing heart, sweaty hands and all that) and I woke feeling really low and wondering what the future will be like if I have this for ever. I keep telling myself I do have good days, but why so few? Onwards and upwards. Kind thoughts to all fellow sufferers.

 

hang in there everyone. It's easy to remember the bad days, and it's easy to take for granted the good ones.

I'm seeing a common theme about an anxiety of phone's dying for masking sounds.

please consider an mp3 player without that flashy touchscreen. I have a Panasonic mp3 player that takes a single AA battery and gets 80 hrs run time! It's very small and incredibly durable. Easy to throw in your purse or day bag or whatever.

I've had the panasonic for probably ten years and it works great. It's only 2GB but if you are using it for masking sounds that's plenty of space.

I'm not sure if this model is still for sale, but you should be able to find similar ones...look for very basic screen, and check battery life ratings.

hope this helps. it's really important to reduce anxiety when dealing with T.

 

you should always have an extra mp3 player at home, just to feel safer-if your phone doesnt work ,you dont have to be without your masking sounds-this calms me down too cause i know that feeling of fear that my mp3 player could stop working and i cant mask anymore . now that i have another one, i feel much better

 

I feel for you folks there. I had been exactly like that a few years back. I needed masking all the time because my anxiety and panic disorder could be turned on in a flash if the masking was not there for my ultra high pitch loud tinnitus shrill.

I had a CD player by my bed playing all high frequency nature sounds. I used an ipod downloaded with nature sounds from Amazon and I made sure it was always charged well at night so I could use it during the day. I would be in paranoid mode if for some reason the charging wasn't done and the ipod wouldn't work for me during the day. My work PC was loaded with a 'aire freshener', a free sound generator. So I had it covered, from home (the CD player), on the road (ipod) and at work (the PC). I also had multiple pills of Ativan in my pocket at all time ready for any panic attack. Those were the days of nerve and fear. I thought I would never live without masking for the rest of my life and fear for this ringing would stay forever.

Again never say never. These days, with the brain habituated to the sound, masking is not really that big a deal. It is often not needed whether T is loud or not. I used to wake up with this loud ringing and the brain would cave into panic on auto mode. Had to take Ativan and put on the masking sounds right away.

No longer!!! It is optional if T ringing bores me. The brain can tolerate this boring high pitch shrill and I can get back to sleep even with this loud ringing. Never know how the brain can do this. But it is able to ignore T when it slowly learns that T is not life threatening nor a catastrophe. So it does learn to relax even facing the mad ringing. So relax folks, given time you and your brain would not be so freaked out by T and masking can be reduced or eliminated. Be patient and hang in there.

 

So glad to have just read this, as i'm having a my life is over morning ... thanks.

 

My power went out at home due to weather last week for 2 days... I darted to the store for a car charger! Lol

 

I'm only 6 weeks into this....

My t is often not maskable, loud shreik about 13000 hertz

I'm very anxious also.

I have slept on it very loud, no masking, not easy,but seems to tame the beast. Positive reinforcement, after a few minutes(hours sometimes...)you get used to it...

Masking barely works for me, so had no choice to learn.

It's not THAT bad, try it, tough it out. It doesn't always work...sometimes I need to shower or leave my room, but I would say a good 70% of the time, gets easier the more you do it.

 

I use noise box app iphone purple noise at night. The best thing about it you can match the frequency. For during the day I used in ear hearing aid maskers. Cost a fortune at $5000 , but life saver.

 

If you can get your life back for $5,000, it's a good deal.

 

I would pay a million..if I was only able to work for 40 years

 

Agreed. I went to the tinnitus clinic in London. It wasn't a miracle cure but it made the T bearable. Years after my quitting my meds my T has reuced greatly on its own so I am lucky.