I Can't Take This High-Pitched Ringing Anymore — I Would Rather Be Dead

I'm 60 years old, have high frequency hearing loss, and I was exposed to carbon monoxide, don't know if that made it worse? High anxiety I recently lost my dad and my mom is sick. This is hard.

 

Taking the easy way seems like the only answer. This life is horrific.

 

Let me share something with you -

I lost both my parents less than 5 years ago and I was their main caregiver for close to 15 years. This life is brutal and very difficult. I was in an environment where either they were headed to ER, hospital or just chaos 2 4 7 with brutal not forgiving tinnitus.

Yes, it is hard, yes even at times i thought this life would just crush my soul. You just have to have faith that things will work out..one way or another. The storm looks scary right now, but you CAN and will be ok.

I was in this all ALONE, no real help from anyone. Not a lot of support, love, care..nothing. Just my courage to fight thousands of demons all by myself. Please try to remain calm and possibly talk to others that care for you or you care for. Things might seem ugly right now, I been there many many times. The reward and sunshine is always out there.

Never give up!

 

Thanks Fish bone, but my tinnitus is brutal, I think it was made worse by carbon monoxide poisoning.

 

@bob bauer im sorry for the loss and sorry about you mum being ill , I am 21 and I have anxiety and OCD and mild depression and on top of that the T and I've got all this while I'm still young.. but I won't let them beat me. Just trying to give some hope. Good luck, you should go to the doctors about this carbon monoxide exposure.

 

Thanks, I went to the doctors, but they don't know anything. I was in a closed garage for about 30 minutes with truck running, when I came out I felt fine, went to E.R. next day, said blood test was normal, but they say it's out of the blood in 3-5 hours. But now my ears ring worse and I have night sweats and tremors in hands and feet.

 

Anyone think it could be the carbon monoxide? I called the poison control center and they said no. But doctors don't know much, should I do MRI?

 

@bob bauer have you tried to mask the sound out at nights so you can get a decent sleep?

 

Too loud to mask, I just run a fan.

 

Woke up soaked in sweat, and ears really ringing. What is going on? Meds, carbon monoxide or anxiety?

 

I've gained more understanding about suffering by reading books about it. Then, I learn how to meditate and try to let go. There are still pain and severe tinnitus but I accept my current reality. Meanwhile, I still do whatever it takes to recover.

 

Most of the literature I see relates to CO exposure in terms of Parts Per Million (concentration) which could be relevant in a confined space without decent venting.

I've learned that when a Doctor dismisses an idea it usually has more to do with "I'm a Doctor, you're not", than it has to do with any actual science.

 

How long ago did it happen?

 

Happened in late April, they said blood test was okay, but they took it the next day.

 

I also had no symptoms after it was over, no loss of consciousness, no dizziness, no nausea,nothing at all.

 

Try to control your stress, you did this once be for, you can do this again

 

Try you tube tinnitus therapy, find what you like and use headphones

 

I think you're going trough a very stressful traumatic time, which had caused you to over-think this carbon monoxide incident, and the increase in T is probably from stress, and temporary. I highly doubt that you have carbon monoxide poisoning, if you had, you'd have been very sick by now, if not dead. Lots of people are exposed to it every day, many probably more than you were and they're fine, as I'm sure you are.

 

@bob bauer, not to be judgemental but why were you sitting in a closed garage with a truck running?! Was this a previous suicide attempt? Have you considered detoxing your body under a doctor's supervision to see if the medication you're on is the cause of the recent uptick? As others have said stress is known to cause an increase in tinnitus symptoms. Talking with a therapist could help in more ways than one. Hang in there. XoXoXo

 

@bob bauer, please read the top post in this thread
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/a-life-with-tinnitus-—-how-to-live.23673/page-3

 

Yes, suicide attempt. Now my mom has passed away, and i'm hearing the morse code sound more. Trying to taper off my AD- remeron, also take lorazepam and temazepam. I heard now mirtazapine causes tinnitus?

 

I'm 52 ive had T for 4 months, and also during this time I lost my brother, sorry for your loss also care for mom. My T moderate and moves around my head, I also heard other sounds that made me go blastic. But you need to get out of that dark box, right now on channel 13 Carol King and James Taylor are on so it's like watching a concert in your own home. You need to find happy things even if it's little. Again sorry for your loss.