I Want to Die

Discussion in 'Support' started by Portia Green, Apr 17, 2017.

    1. Portia Green

      Portia Green Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I'm tired of not getting any sleep...I'm tired of thinking about T...I'm just tired....I just want to know why me????
       
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    2. glynis
      Feminine

      glynis Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      2004
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Meniere's Disease
      Aww ! No.
      You need to see your doctor if not sleeping to give you something to sleep.

      We can not stop tinnitus but we can get the best help available to cope with problems it causes.
      Lack of sleep will effect you mentally and physically so thats the first step for you is sorting sleep out.
      You might need a low AD for sleep and will work and can be taken long term.

      We are here around the clock for you so don't do nothing silly and get help.

      Love glynis
       
    3. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Portia Green

      Portia Green Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Thank you...I won't do anything crazy but I am so tired of noise...I'm just in a very bad head space right now...I keep thinking about how am I going to deal with this every day
       
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    4. Wojtek Kalka
      Badass

      Wojtek Kalka Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Bangkok
      Tinnitus Since:
      1994
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Very loud concert.
      Your tinnitus is very new .. so what sound do you hear? ... can a sinus tone mask it? My trick is to use
      an app like I posted on another thread ... called Sound Generator pro it mask my tinnitus only for about 2min
      if I do a sinus swipe from 1000-20000hz in 2min ... then I add the walk in the park noise from the mynoise app and first slept the last two nights really well took me 2 weeks to find out what works but I will gladly help you.
       
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    5. Wojtek Kalka
      Badass

      Wojtek Kalka Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Bangkok
      Tinnitus Since:
      1994
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Very loud concert.
      You will and it will get better and better .. yes it took me six month when I got it running from doctor to doctor but trust me over 95% people can habilitate it and live a very good life. This are my last five years https://500px.com/wojtekkalka and I have a tinnitus 3-5/10 well now for a month 5-7 :( .. trying to cope with it again after my last spike ..7/10 where 10 is I want to die is pretty severy but I manage fine ... did you try some drugs?
       
    6. BLane
      Dreaming

      BLane Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Washington State, USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      07/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I know it's nearly impossible to fathom this early on, but give it time. In several months you won't pay attention to the sound anymore. It'll stop bothering you and life returns to normal. You won't have to wear yourself out dealing with it. In the meantime, do your best to stay busy or distract yourself and let your brain work it's magic with the T. You will win.
       
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    7. Wojtek Kalka
      Badass

      Wojtek Kalka Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Bangkok
      Tinnitus Since:
      1994
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Very loud concert.
      About 21,000 people die every day of hunger or hunger-related causes, wish they could ask why me? Shit happens is the answer .. you can rarely change the cards you get but you can always change the way you play them ... I just lost one of my best friends 2 month ago ... my mom with 5, my other best friends with 17 and 36 ... two from car accidents, one from suicide (depression) and the last from a skydiving accident ... why me? because shit happens also have the best girlfriend in the world and a good job and amazing friends .. and yes still 7/10 drives you crazy at times ... but actually it is you that drives you crazy .. mediate and calm down and problems will solve .. btw I read that over 90% of people do not hear the tinnitus in their dreams :)
       
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    8. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Portia Green

      Portia Green Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Umm mine is more of a buzz but for the past few days I have been super sensitive to sounds and it's very bad at night...so I think something else besides T is going on...been to an end twice was told I have normal hearing..
      Told to take some pills that is suppose to help....I think they are called lipo flavoniod
       
    9. Wojtek Kalka
      Badass

      Wojtek Kalka Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Bangkok
      Tinnitus Since:
      1994
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Very loud concert.
      How did you get it and what kind of buzz? Can you describe it more ..http://www.szynalski.com/tone-generator/ is a tone generator is there any frequency close? be careful not to use it too loud .. try Prednisolon it works in some cases. Did you try to mask it it? A good website is mynoise.net
       
    10. Aschenherz
      Cheerful

      Aschenherz Member

      Location:
      Germany
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017 H since 7/2022
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Portia. I also think at the moment kinda like u. But this wouldn't help. We have the same 2,5 Months and here are so many kindly people, who will give u hope. pls don't do this. I also had two extremly painful days cuz of easter and no family and no distraction. But we will all get better in time. I truly think so. If u are overwhelmed by the sound like me, then look for a medical center that give u meds. I'm also going to do that tommorow. We will win and get our lifes back.

      Do u have a headphone? just put it on your head, without sound. Will the sensetivity gets better? I hope so, than that is a very good help for me.
       
    11. Wojtek Kalka
      Badass

      Wojtek Kalka Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Bangkok
      Tinnitus Since:
      1994
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Very loud concert.
      @Aschenherz what is your sound like, reason unknown? It just came out of the blue? Never EVER think about suicide for you that is no big deal, well you are dead anyway but you will nearly hurt EVERYONE you love A LOT .. which is horrible most of these people with have long lasting issues with it ...pretty selfish .. :p ;) ... life can be fucking amazing even with no legs, no eye sights, no limps ...look at Steven Hawkins .. he is surely in a worse condition .. the main issue with T is the more you bother about it the worse it gets .. that is even more worse than the tinnitus itself ..
       
    12. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Portia Green

      Portia Green Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I don't know what caused my T this is the crazy part about it...I have a prescription for prednisone that I have to get filled....I don't have any headphones at the moment aschenherz...I need to invest in some
       
    13. Aschenherz
      Cheerful

      Aschenherz Member

      Location:
      Germany
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017 H since 7/2022
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      i have 4 sounds from the beginning, reason unknown, yes. the sound in my head is the worst. lays on 13.000 Hertz.
      glynis told me, that her head sound got away from an med. so it's a good chance that mine will go away too.
       
    14. Aschenherz
      Cheerful

      Aschenherz Member

      Location:
      Germany
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017 H since 7/2022
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      earplugs can also help, just for an hour or two. It's some kind of hyperacusis that u suffering from, i guess.
       
    15. MikeL1972

      MikeL1972 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      3/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Uknown
      Portia, it *will* get better. Just give it some time!

      Regarding sleep -- however -- that is essential to your health. If you cannot sleep, go to see your primary doctor stat! Otherwise, lack of sleep can cascade into a host of conditions that will really be cause for alarm. Please, do not discount this advice!
       
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    16. Aschenherz
      Cheerful

      Aschenherz Member

      Location:
      Germany
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017 H since 7/2022
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      like Mike said, sleep is a HUGE difference. get this first. and read successful stories or watch videos from julian cowen hill before u sleep. the anxiety keeps u awake.
       
    17. Wojtek Kalka
      Badass

      Wojtek Kalka Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Bangkok
      Tinnitus Since:
      1994
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Very loud concert.
      Well decent headphones sell for 10eu at Amazon.de deliver next day .. Prednisolon you get at nearly every pharmacy in Germany, do you have no computer or phone to run apps or websites? Tinnitus forces you to act, just as I said if you just feel pity for yourself you are building a grave for yourself ... actually when I got my tinnitus I just worked out for stayed awake for 18h worked out 2-3 and fell asleep like dead with a loud tinnitus but there are lot more gentle ways ...
       
    18. Aschenherz
      Cheerful

      Aschenherz Member

      Location:
      Germany
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017 H since 7/2022
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      i took two times prednisolon and both times it getting better, but with lowering the dosage, the sound in the head became more severe. under the drug is was annoying as hell, but not the lifetaker, that is it now. And yes, i mask every time when i can. have a sound for sleep, that i play every single night and getting a good amount of hours. the sleep isn't my problem. The sound is.

      so im going in a clinic. maybe they can help me. It's not a failure, just strech out for options. And yes, negative thinking is like digging a grave. But i had these problems in the past, it's hard to do something about it.
       
    19. Wojtek Kalka
      Badass

      Wojtek Kalka Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Bangkok
      Tinnitus Since:
      1994
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Very loud concert.
      In Germany you have to take Prednisolone over a 19 or 10 days plan I can send you the German plans from the medical association .. most clinics can't help you took me about 20+ in Germany until I found a doctor that taught me it does do nothing to you if you do not let it do anything to you .. pretty hard but pretty true ...
       
    20. Aschenherz
      Cheerful

      Aschenherz Member

      Location:
      Germany
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017 H since 7/2022
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      i have, thank u. unfortunately it's not that, that helped.

      also, it's not getting about me here. :( It's rude to write about me in this thread..
       
    21. RonnieCarzatto
      Cynical

      RonnieCarzatto Member

      Location:
      Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      Feb 01 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Mild head injury maybe... but who knows...
      Not sure if this will help but three months ago I so badly wanted to die. I was ready to swallow my entire batch of clonazepam and wash it down with jack daniels whiskey.

      The best advice I have been told here was to give it time. And I am glad I did. I won't lie to you and say my tinnitus doesn't bother me. It does. But in three months, I've gone from "tinnitus is making me suicidal" to "tinnitus is annoying". Sleep has slowly returned to my life.

      Trust me, I have bad tinnitus, and never ever imagined falling asleep naturally again. Time has proven me wrong. Be patient and you will be fine, I am sure of it.
       
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    22. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Portia Green

      Portia Green Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Thank you Ronnie...I needed to see that post!! So what kind of sound do you have?
       
    23. RonnieCarzatto
      Cynical

      RonnieCarzatto Member

      Location:
      Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      Feb 01 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Mild head injury maybe... but who knows...
      It's primarily in my right ear though I have other more mild tones in my left. The right ear one started back in January and was what sent me over the edge, it came out of nowhere, maybe from a head bump I suffered, but not sure. It's a high squealing pitchy tone. I can only compare it to either a dentist's drill or an electrical... thing. "EEEEEEEEEEEE". Constant. Never changes, food, supplements, caffeine don't affect it. Plugging my ears makes it louder because then it sounds like it's from my head. It is somatic as moving my neck and jaw can change the pitch, but otherwise it's always there and I hear it all the time. During the day it's not so bad though it still bothers me. At night before bed it's unrelentingly loud. I remember seeing that Reddit cure video being all excited to hear some silence, bit that finger tapping thing doesn't do anything for me. Craziest part? No hearing loss.
       
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    24. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Portia Green

      Portia Green Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I have no hearing loss either....I don't even know what caused mine
       
    25. Joanne Philps
      Alienated

      Joanne Philps Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      10/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Flight
      Know how you feel portia, I'm 6 1/2 months in , sooooo loud both ears, no sleep and no hearing loss, also have balance issues and getting to the end of my tether, I cannot believe the volume of this tinnitus , talk about ruining what was once a care free happy life, I hate every day now but not as much as the night!
       
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    26. RonnieCarzatto
      Cynical

      RonnieCarzatto Member

      Location:
      Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      Feb 01 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Mild head injury maybe... but who knows...
      @Portia Green I'm in the same boat. I *think* mine was caused by a head injury I sustained back in January. But I'm not positive because the tinnitus started two weeks after. It could be anything really.

      A lot of people here gave great advice. I know it sucks and I wouldn't wish this s*it on anyone, but even I am amazed at what time can do. This forum is a lifesaver.
       
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    27. Spiral
      Balanced

      Spiral Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise Induced
      Portia, I know exactly how you feel. Whatever you do, fucking know that you are not alone. We're here for you. Go to the Dr. and get some sleeping meds (Lunesta is the best IMO, minimal side effects), you'll feel much better after a full night's sleep.
       
    28. Bill Bauer
      No Mood

      Bill Bauer Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      February, 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic Trauma
      My T began 11 days after my acoustic trauma.
       
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