I'm Gradually Losing Hope — My Story

Discussion in 'Introduce Yourself' started by KevTav, Jan 27, 2020.

    1. KevTav

      KevTav Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2018
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Not sure.
      I am a male, 40s, live in California.

      Roughly 1.5 years ago I had a very bad sinus flu I caught from someone. It was one of the most painful flus I've ever had. It had me congested everywhere. Face puffy, ears congested, nose congested. For some reason during this illness I did push ups. I sat in my chair after a set. About 2 minutes later the LOUDEST ringing had me on the floor, I fell onto the ground it was so painful. My life hasn't been the same since.

      I went to the Doctor and he noticed I was congested all throughout my head. He prescribed stuff and I thought my tinnitus would go away. 2 weeks and I was not congested anymore or sick. The Tinnitus stayed. It slowly got "better". It was at a 6 most days in the beginning. It gradually got lower but WORSE while sleeping. A "hiss" in my left ear. I started to notice a "wowwowow"pulse too, which is in my right ear, AND in the background a constant "crickets" sound, which sounds like crickets are in a field far away. These noises have been constant ever since.

      They are not 'debilitating". They are low in volume, but annoying and draining.

      I noticed early off the bat that the hissing is tied to my jaw and it's placement. In fact i believe most if not ALL my tinnitus is due a 'somatic ' cause. But I have tried EVERYTHING. Stretches, TMJ exercises, trigger point massage, heat, ice, every exercise in the book, until I'm worn out. Nothing has silenced it. I have never worked so hard to "fix" a thing in my life. But it's just not progressing.

      I've been musician and producer since 17. I NEVER had any issues with hearing. I worked in a steal mill and had pipe banging near my head for 5 years, nothing damaged my hearing. In fact my hearing is in the top 1% for my age. Yet here I am.

      Some days are better than other. But most night I struggle to sleep through. Being out and about during the day masks the sound, mostly. On bad days I can hear the "hiss" through ambient noise. But that's rare. I have the luxury of my tinnitus being "low". But when I'm home, alone and in my room or in bed, sometimes I cannot cope with the noises. They're all around, like a symphony of aggravating sounds that I don't want to hear.

      The "crickets" noise colors most sounds like a fan or water. The "wowowow" sounds are just annoying. The "hiss" is constant, only helped by Magnesium, Meditation, and MAYBE massage of jaw stretches and posture correction. But NOTHING will release me from this hell. It's a day to day struggle, and I've spent countless hours chasing this down, thinking I have the "answer".

      Long story long, I am not sure I can endure this. My quality of life is way diminished. I'm not happy anymore. I thought this would go away, but I am starting to thing there is actually "no cure" and the naysayers were right, and I've been wasting my time. It's come down to that realization. I'm OBSESSED with it, and 95% of my attention is on sounds, and trying to make them go away. I have no life anymore.

      And I really don't want this anymore. I've survived some really bad stuff, but this is too much I think.
       
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    2. LongWait

      LongWait Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      11/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loud Concert
      I'm with you buddy, this seems an impossible life, somehow I manage after 2 years, but everyday it's a grind, I don't feel can live rest of life like this, try and hold out for Dr. Shore's device, it looks promising.
       
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    3. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      KevTav

      KevTav Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2018
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Not sure.
      Thanks for the response. I have to look into Dr. Shore, I don't know who he is.

      Just Googled it, "She". Sorry
       
    4. Dhaych

      Dhaych Member

      Location:
      Cork, Ireland
      Tinnitus Since:
      2010
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced - musician
      I've been musician and producer since 17. I NEVER had any issues with hearing. I worked in a steal mill and had pipe banging near my head for 5 years, nothing damaged my hearing. In fact my hearing is in the top 1% for my age. Yet here I am.[/QUOTE]
      Are you sure it's not noise induced over time? That's what mine is... especially if you're a producer also, which would mean headphones. My hearing is also fine... but my tinnitus is most definitely noise induced from years of playing without ear plugs etc. Hope it heals up soon man.
       
    5. brokensoul

      brokensoul Member

      Location:
      Belgium
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/05/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      unknown:medication,cannabis,stress,sleep deprivation
      Why do you think it’s related to your jaw? Have you seen a TMJ specialist? If the cause of your tinnitus is somatic you have a fair chance you could be helped.

      Reading you story however, it is much more likely that you have some form of hearing damage.

      You state that you have great hearing, but this is based on what exactly?

      What type of hearing tests have you done? Did you have an extended audiogram up to 16kHz? There are also other tests you should do to see if you have any damage. Even if the tests all come up clear, you can still have hidden hearing loss. Our current hearing tests are limited.

      You have to understand that hearing damage is cumulative. Your hearing degenerates over time and you may not be aware of this at all until you reach a breaking point and a tinnitus signal is generated along the auditory pathway.

      I can relate to your suffering and unfortunately there are no easy answers.

      I would however do more extensive testing to see if there really is no hint of hearing damage.

      On a positive note, researchers are making progress in regenerative therapies to restore hearing. If the cause for your tinnitus is hearing damage there is a reasonable chance that you will be helped in the foreseeable future.

      Greetings.
       
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    6. brokensoul

      brokensoul Member

      Location:
      Belgium
      Tinnitus Since:
      02/05/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      unknown:medication,cannabis,stress,sleep deprivation
      • Like Like x 1
    7. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      KevTav

      KevTav Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2018
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Not sure.
      Are you sure it's not noise induced over time? That's what mine is... especially if you're a producer also, which would mean headphones. My hearing is also fine... but my tinnitus is most definitely noise induced from years of playing without ear plugs etc. Hope it heals up soon man.[/QUOTE]

      I used headphones probably thousands of hours in my life. Before the 'incident' I mentioned, I NEVER had any tinnitus, or that I was aware of. Meaning, I did not have any issue. Not one noise.
       
      • Informative Informative x 1
    8. ThomasC
      Lonely

      ThomasC Member Benefactor

      Location:
      France
      Tinnitus Since:
      2012
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      hearing loss
      I used headphones probably thousands of hours in my life. Before the 'incident' I mentioned, I NEVER had any tinnitus, or that I was aware of. Meaning, I did not have any issue. Not one noise.[/QUOTE]

      I have hearing loss in the very high frequencies, i can't hear anything above 8Khz . I don't know how long I have had hearing loss, but I'm sure that it was way before the onset of my tinnitus.
      Maybe you have hidden hearing loss which means the cochlear nerve synapses may be damaged.
       

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