Ketamine Infusion for Depression Ruined Me by Causing My Tinnitus

Hi,

I suffer from severe depression and anxiety, and up to about 5 years ago, treatment with anti-depressants worked. Then my doctor recommended Ketamine infusion which I started about 2.5 years ago.

I had all the normal effects as one does from this type of drug, except I received it in clinical settings.

It was hit and miss whether or not it would work for my extreme, debilitating suicidal depression. When it worked, it was great. When it didn’t, it was just disappointing.

I ended up on a very high dose for my last 5 or 6 treatments. I moved and had to switch providers a couple times.

My last treatment was at the end of November 2021. I’d had 3 previous treatments with these anesthesiologists, but something went very wrong the last time.

During my hour-long infusion, I had to have the treatment paused twice. That’s never happened to me. I became incredibly dizzy, and my ears started ringing like crazy.

I had none of the usual experiences like disassociation or visual hallucinations. Instead, I became terrified.

The doctor seemed baffled, but assured me that the ringing would go away within a day or two. It’s went away about 10 days later, but it was only for a single day.

Here I am 4 months later, totally unable to function and feeling like I’ve lost my mind. I’ve had 4 quiet days in 4 months, 2 of which were back to back, but there’s been nothing but loud noises, different sounds, tones, sometimes many mixed together.

Already having been easily annoyed by outside sounds, this is hell.

That treatment ended up being the best one I’d ever had for my depression. It completely lifted it for over 2 months. Now I’m left with the old horrible depression, anxiety, and never-ending noise.

Thank you for reading.

 

Wow. So sorry this happened. Indeed, medications can have serious effects of various kinds on hearing. Many people do experience a lessening or resolution of symptoms within a year, so don't give up hope.

I would avoid anything that really makes your tinnitus worse, but otherwise try to continue your normal routines and activities. Many people with tinnitus also experience hyperacusis where all noise sounds louder, but especially impact or clanging noises, and that can be a real challenge in modern life.

For most doctors, these conditions are out of their range of expertise. My guess is that an ENT or otolaryngologist would be of no help. Rather, I would suggest seeing an audiologist who has real experience in treating these issues, and maybe a counselor who also has expertise in these areas. You will need treatment from knowledgeable providers especially with your underlying depression and anxiety issues.

Most people do get better or do learn to cope and continue their lives, so please remember that.

 

I’m applying for VAD in Switzerland. Existing has become unbearable.

 

How old are you?

Do you have kids?

 

Hey, I understand how you feel, I've struggled with tinnitus & hyperacusis related anxiety myself. I've contemplated euthanasia because of my hyperacusis.

Are you sure you want to end your life? There are so many treatments that'll help for tinnitus in the pipeline right now. We are in a place in history about which many tinnitus sufferers have dreamed of.

There are also many supplements and medicines you can already try out now that might help with it.

Are you currently taking any of them?

I've had tinnitus for a decade know. Even though new tones and volumes always give stress, you'll eventually learn to adapt to them.
Years go by so quick. Before you know it there is a treatment available.

A few years of pain and suffering can never outweigh the hurt your family will feel if you really decide to do this.

 

Have you improved at all in the past 7 months?

 

My mother, sister and I don’t even know if the other two are dead or alive, nor do we care. I’m a childfree antinatalist. I also deal with chronic pain and many other health issues. I’m more than done with suffering. Menopause & tinnitus ruined my health and me. Men don’t get it, and neither do women who haven’t been through it or who it hardly affected.

It’s terrible to try to lay a guilt trip on somebody who’s suffering. The most selfish thing people can do is breed. Nobody asked to be born, and EVERYONE should have the right to end their existence peacefully on their terms. Period!

Nope. It’s gotten way worse. I had horrible insomnia before tinnitus. Now I’m lucky to get 4 or 5 hours of broken sleep in a night. And, I can’t deal with constant noise.

I’m in my 50s and childfree.

 

Hey, try Mirtazapine for sleep. I’m two years in and it’s essential.

 

Are you getting better? Are you applying for VAD at Pegasos?

 

Checking back in on this thread. @VeganJS, how are you doing?

 

What supplements and meds do you speak of here?

 

Didn't have anything particular in mind.

I think improving one's overall health and wellbeing is the best strategy for combatting tinnitus.

 

Very sad thread. I hope @VeganJS appears back. I can imagine someone who is tinnitus free and battling depression - is the last person equipped to cope with this wretched condition.

I have seen Ketamine mentioned in some forums and groups and the answer is always - be careful.

 

@VeganJS, please tell me you are still here.

 

When I had Ketamine in my veins, I felt like I had one foot in hell. My tinnitus went 300% higher. This state lasted about 2 hours, but felt like it lasted 3 days. Ketamine never again. One Professor used my case in his textbook as an unexpected reaction.

 

Shit, I was scheduled for Ketamine for Wednesday. I guess I'll cancel and go to the woods instead and see how long I can stay in quiet and hope to not hang myself.

 

Try to agree on a half dose, for example. I was scheduled for 3 doses, with a break of 2 days, but I already refused the third, even though the doctor convinced me to endure it. It was unbearable. Really indescribable feeling.

 

I've seen almost everyone say that Ketamine caused their tinnitus to spike while they were high but it always wears off.

 

What part of it was unbearable? The disassociation?

 

Ketamine is a drug. It is said to induce a very pleasant state. Well-being, relaxation. It caused me an indescribable feeling of dread. I was very dizzy. I lost my orientation in time and space. I got a crazy fear that this condition will remain. I felt like I was stuck in it for 3 days. Horror, disgusting feeling. And tinnitus through the roof. But the doctor said that my reaction was very unexpected. Try it, I was an exception.

 

I've taken Ketamine recreationally and I've found the effects very bizarre, not bad and not good, just strange? It's only afterwards that I get improvements to my mood.

 

Sounds like you are extremely sensitive to it. I don't like that feeling really either but it's sometimes enjoyable if you know it's coming.

 

I hope they aren't responding because they have improved! Sad to read something like this and then get no follow up.

 

@VeganJS did mention they were applying for VAD (voluntary assisted dying) so I wouldn't be too hopeful about this particular case.

 

That's really sad.

And to be honest, I considered suicide during my first two weeks (admittedly I am only a day past 3 weeks of it now). In Canada they are allowing people with mental illness to apply starting March 2023. I don't feel I need to do that anymore.

There have been a few people that have been incredibly positive and supportive in my introductory thread. I really feel they have helped me recognize the positives even if what I write doesn't always display that. Here is hoping they got lucky and decided to just stop visiting here during recovery.

 

You keep saying go to the woods, but how would one survive there? Hunt with your bare hands?

 

That is true, sometimes even people without tinnitus hear a ringing sound, I believe usually on the come up.

For anyone wondering, Ketamine did absolutely nothing for my hyperacusis. It's strange how Ketamine can numb other sensations but there's just no way to escape hyperacusis pain.

 

Die or buy cabin.

 

Well you would need to drive to town for supplies and food, which will expose you to noise.

 

I tried a bunch of Ketamine recently and it didn't change my tinnitus or pain hyperacusis one way or the other. Maybe it made tinnitus a little worse during it but it's the exact same now again.