My Story — Tinnitus Faded After 2 Months, However I Messed Up Again...

Discussion in 'Introduce Yourself' started by Walker123, Apr 15, 2020.

    1. Walker123

      Walker123 Member

      Location:
      The Netherlands
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Hi everyone,

      I am from the Netherlands and I first got real tinnitus in April 2019.

      I would like to share my story.

      PRE-TINNITUS

      In hindsight I always had very mild tinnitus since childhood. I didn't even know I have it and it didn't bother me at all. When I was in bed I heard a faint noise from what I thought was a water running through the heating pipelines of the house. I didn't even pay attention to it. I also had a very high pitched noise as if an old CRT-TV was switched on down stairs. It was not loud and I thought it was normal. Only when I discovered that the noise wasn't from our TV I was slightly shocked, but because I didn't know better that didn't bother me as well. I even thought it must be normal and most people have it.

      Fast forward to my late 30's. My right ear would sometimes be a little bit more noisy. I couldn't really make out what kind of noise. Sometimes it would annoy me a bit but it wasn't really bothering me yet. My right ear also developed a soft whistling sound, which bothered me a bit for about a month but after that I didn't mind about it. I could listen to it without any emotional reaction.

      I was the kind of person that went clubbing and go to festivals without ear protection. But no one really did. I never really knew that it was so bad for the ears. I would also listen to loud music through my earbuds at work. Not everyday, but sometimes a week in a row.

      2018: THE EARLY SIGNS

      In fall 2018 I started to wake up in the middle of the night with ringing ears. It would be a bit louder and more complex sounding. I didn't understand why, because I couldn't remember any noise incident that might have caused it.
      I started to have these nightly "tinnitus attacks" once or twice a month. The first time it caused me to panic, but everytime I was fine again in the morning. I was puzzled though. Could it be because of my nose which has a slight deviated septum and is blocked a lot of the time? Could it be sleep apnea? In hindsight I think it might be a delayed reaction to music over headphones a few days before.

      APRIL 2019: HORRIBLE TINNITUS

      In April 2019 I bought some wood to make a bench in the garden. I worked on it every Saturday. To cut the wooden planks I used a very loud circle saw. I did this for 3 Saturdays. There were no problems.
      But then a week after that on the fourth Saturday, I woke up in the middle of the night with VERY LOUD HIGH PITCHED NOISE in both my ears. It was like the old CRT-TV sound, but only like 10 times louder. The next day it was still there. I could hear it over everything. I didn't really realize what was going on and walked around with this horrible sound until I collapsed mentally two weeks later. I was in total panic.
      In the next month I was a mess. And often when I went to sleep I would wake up in the middle of the night with a tinnitus attack where it got even worse. This happened three times, but within 24 hours it would go back to the loud high pitched noise. I could hear it everywhere, also because it was such a high pitch: outside, in the supermarket, in the car, in the forest, while watching TV.

      JUNE 2019: GETTING BETTER AGAIN AFTER :)

      In June I got days where the tinnitus would first go from a solid noise to an intermittent morse style noise. And then a day later it would fade to a much softer noise. I was ecstatic! I thought it was gone.
      But then the day after it would come back.
      But luckily, the good days became more and I got less bad days! I was getting better.
      This fading started after 1.5 months.
      I only had a bit of a faint sharp high pitched tone in my right ear which became louder if when I chewed food. But I was happy, I could live like this.
      And I became more lucky. The chewing-tinnitus faded as well! Once in a while it would come back for a day, but I was glad that the majority of time it was silent again!

      OCTOBER 2019: ONE MONTH SPIKE

      Late October for some reason I got a spike. God knows why. I admit that I started listening to my 5.1 home cinema quite loud again sometimes. And listening to music sometimes.
      Of course I was in total panic again. But after roughly 1 month things got better again.

      JANUARY 2020: THIS TIME ITS FOR REAL?

      Of course I had to throw a new years party and get drunk and listen to my neighbours fire crackers! Yay!
      Next day: January 1st I had a hangover. Nothing out of the ordinary.
      January 2nd: my tinnitus came back! I was a bit disappointed, but I thought this was just another bad day.
      And of course the longer it lasted, the more I would freak out.
      I started to get really depressed. Was this my last chance. Did I mess things up for good?
      Also weird new noises would start to join in. Lower high pitched tones around 5000 Hz. They would do weird things like go up and down in pitch. As if my brain was calibrating the sound or something.
      I also got a new whistle sound on and off like a human whistling in my left ear.
      I would listen to it and try to make sense out of all of this.

      MID FEBRUARY

      Of course I would tell myself it would not be chronic and I had to wait 3 months. And somewhere mid February things started to get better again. The CRT noise faded. The other noises as well. They were still there but much more in the background. I started to be optimistic again.
      Until that same Sunday I attended a birthday party. There was no loud music, but there were a lot of people talking. An I was talking for half an hour with someone and we had to raise our voice a bit to hear each other. I felt that somehow this was not so good for me and I would also get fleeting tinnitus in my right ear during the conversation.
      The day after that my tinnitus was back again. I was a bit surprised, because the party was not THAT loud.
      I was depressed again.

      I would have a couple of good days MID MARCH and in the beginning of this month, where my highest pitched noise would fade again. The other most bothering noise is a 5000 Hz beep in my right ear, which is just about audible when I'm walking outside. At night it becomes bothering.

      NOW

      So now I'm 3.5 months in. And the last 10 days has been constant CRT noise, which I can hear over everything, because of it pitch. It seems to come from inside my head. And the 5000 Hz tone I hear slightly softer under it in my right ear.

      I also have about 6 other low pitched tones left and right, but they don't bother me really. The are very faint.

      At the moment I am a bit depressed. And I think I might be in for the long run. I am putting a lot of emotional strain on myself and my family.
      Is this ever going to fade again?

      Thank you for reading my story. I hope it was not too long. And I hope someone can give me some advice.

      Kind regards,
      Walker123
       
      • Hug Hug x 4
    2. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Walker123

      Walker123 Member

      Location:
      The Netherlands
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Short update after 4 months:

      I waited a while before posting this update, because most of you know, things can turn around on a daily basis.

      I can't say if the tinnitus is any less in actual volume. But the good news is that mentally it's going much better now.

      The ultra high-pitched hiss does come and go. Sometimes it's gone for 2 day, but now, while I'm typing it it's here. I don't care about it so much because I know it will go away again.
      The other 5000 hz high pitched tone is still there but it I can keep it out of my focus quite well. Possibly because the volume of this tone doesn't exceed background noise (much). When it's quiet it gets louder, but I don't care about it so much any more. It used to drive me mad. When it's quiet my overall head-noise is quite annoying, but I don't think about it and just ignore it and then I forget about it.

      I am a bit worried about the future. I know that further hearing damage will probably make T louder. I am carefull with my hearing now, but accidents are inevitable. It's part of life. So I just don't think about it and enjoy the fact that I have my life back now.

      In hindsight, things started to get better when I chose not to focus on my suffering, but instead focus on life. And also allow yourself to enjoy things. Ignore the voice that says: "I can't enjoy like normal people because I have tinnitus". Just allow yourself to enjoy something. And focus on the things that deserve your attention in life.
      I consider my T moderate level (did have severe period during the onset last year).

      I am not writing this because I want to, but because I promised myself to give something back to this forum, after reading it for a year. The better I feel, the less I visit this site. But I will come back to report changes once in a while.
       
      • Like Like x 1
      • Agree Agree x 1
      • Hug Hug x 1
      • Friendly Friendly x 1
    3. Michael Leigh

      Michael Leigh Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Brighton, UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      April /1996
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced
      HI @Walker123

      It is good to know you are making some improvement and hope this continues. I have some suggestions that might be of help to you. Although it reads on your Avatar cause of tinnitus unknown, I am fairly certain you have Noise induced tinnitus. Caused by listening to loud music at clubs which resulted in you experiencing tinnitus and also using earbuds while listening to music at high volume levels. These are common causes of Noise induced tinnitus.

      I suggest that you stop using headphones, earbuds or headset even at volume. Try and see an Audiologist that specialises in tinnitus and hyperacusis treatment and management. Please click on the links below and read my posts, that I think will be of help.

      All the best
      Michael

      https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/new-to-tinnitus-what-to-do.12558/
      https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/tinnitus-a-personal-view.18668/
      https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/hyperacusis-as-i-see-it.19174/
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
    4. Tybs

      Tybs Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Fall from stairs
      No use in worrying. Sure, be careful with the ears, but live life while you enjoy it. Otherwise, íf it ever gets worse, you will just have wasted a lot of years worrying for it, while there was nothing you could do about it.
       
    5. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Walker123

      Walker123 Member

      Location:
      The Netherlands
      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Hi Michael, thank a lot for the links! The information is very useful.

      I agree totally.
       
      • Like Like x 1
      • Hug Hug x 1

Share This Page

Loading...