My Story So Far

Hi All,

I have been lurking on here over the past couple of months, and I find it to be a place of solace and camaraderie.

In April of this year I woke up with a ringing in my left ear. There was nothing special about the day before, except a couple of weeks before that I attended an awards ceremony for work, and the months preceding that I had an ear infection. That infection cleared up but I never had tinnitus during the infection.

For the past, it must be 10 or so years I had always slept using ear plugs in total silence. I found comfort in that silence to combat another fear of mine - an irrational fear of insomnia. I was happy during those years and felt I had found inner peace. I was productive at work and this kind of shattered that with force. You can imagine how much tinnitus came as a shock to me - I was in a full blown panic mode for the first month and it all seems a bit of a blur looking back on it.

The second month was also pretty bad. Quite a few sleepless nights, and I still have the odd one occasionally. The tinnitus is mild - I can barely hear it, but my emotional reaction to it has been very strong due to my need/love of silence, and the potential impact on my work (I am a lawyer by profession, so concentration/sleep is key for me).

I haven't had to take any time off work, but I am struggling at work for sure - the problem for me is my relentless searching for it. I feel as though I am suffering from OCD - I am obsessive about it. I'll often try and find a quite place in work and plug my ears to check it is there or not. Sometimes it is there very faint, sometimes it isn't. But oddly, when I sit at my desk it's as though I can feel it.

Now, I know for a fact that my symptoms have improved - initially I could hear the tinnitus all day and certainly when I put my head on my pillow at night. I felt initially like I was getting "head zaps" is the only way to describe it. Now, i'm not even sure I have it sometimes - as I type this post right now I don't think I can hear it, at least i'm not sure anymore if I can differentiate between what is normal silence or not.

Now the weird/interesting part. Without fail, when I wake up in the middle of the night it is there - and it is strong. However, when I move about for 30 minutes, it seems to fade/go away. It isn't simply me noticing it more in silence - it really is there and quite intrusive (by my standards...i know you guys have it far worse) but only when I wake up in the night. When that happens I either sleep through it or will use an app on my phone to mask the sound.

There have been a few nights where i had only slept an hour, it's there and I haven't been able to get back to sleep. Those are the real difficult days at work.

I have seen an ENT, had an MRI and everything was clear. No hearing loss. I am sleeping generally quite well, and because I am rigidly sleeping earlier now to account for difficult nights, i'm probably sleeping more than I did before this occurred.

But I just can't seem to shake my obsession of thinking about it and my dread of going to bed at night - when I know it will be there when I inevitably wake up even if temporarily, and know I have to endure a day dealing with my own OCD. I tried a few nights sleeping with white noise already on, but I just can't seem to drift off without [mostly] silence. Although I'm feeling better - and by the standards of others on here - would seen to be nearly cured - I just can't shake the constant feeling of dread/obsessive thoughts.

At work, it's also as if I can "almost" hear it - and it disrupts my concentration. I find that the sound of crickets eliminates it - but then I wonder if it's all in my mind, and it's playing tricks on me!

I am going to see a psychiatrist this week, and i'm not going to take any meds but maybe just talking will help.

I know i'm just under 3 months in with this, but the constant thinking about it is emotionally/mentally exhausting. I have kept my fitness up, kept working and have been seeing my friends more, and spending time with my family but I just don't feel secure anymore. I still feel anxious, and the days when i don't sleep well become flat out depressed.

Any advice/comments welcome

 

Congratulations !
Your tinnitus is minor compared to majority of people here.
God bless !

 

Hi,

I also slept with earplugs for 2 years. Then one day I woke up with pulsatile tinnitus.

 

I know what you mean. The good news is that (I found out) it is difficult to maintain the same emotional reaction to the same stimulus. If your T doesn't get quieter, within a year you won't have as strong of an emotional reaction. The mild T that you have is the T that it is possible to habituate to. Also, in three months you had achieved the healing that many take over a year to achieve. It ought to continue to fade. It will probably be gone in another 6-12 months. Just ride it out and make sure not to get any secondary ear traumas.

You might find some tips on
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/thread...eone-else-who-has-tinnitus.26850/#post-307822
to be useful.

 

Hannah, I read somewhere else on this forum that if someone overuses earplugs the brain can actually create sound - as if it feels there is actual hearing loss.

It has occurred to me, maybe that might be the cause of our tinnitus? Could be reverse logic, but maybe our solution is not to avoid sound. Clutching at straws... was yours caused by anything specific?

 

Hi @Jamesd,

I certainly hear you about your love of silence. -- Re: some of your OCD symptoms, I think it's possible it could be the result of a nutritional deficiency. The following link will take you to quite a remarkable article on the history of using inositol to successfully treat OCD.​

LISTENING TO INOSITOL: CLINICAL NOTES

You may also want to consider some CBD oil. It's currently working well for me, and I believe it would probably help most people with any kind of brain disorder, or a brain that's fallen out of harmony. I recently bought a brand by Barleans.

Another way to bring balance to the brain--or restore harmony--is to do an energetic technique called, "Balancing the Cortices". Here's a couple of videos on how to do that simple exercise:

Balancing the Cortices Technique

http://www.bodytalksystem.com/learn/access/cortices.cfm
​

All the Best!

P.S. If you're open to a spiritual technique that might help--which I use daily--here's a link to a 3-minute video on singing the HU SONG. -- It's somewhat similar to singing the sound of OM, but has a higher frequency--and from my experience, is more deeply calming.
​

 

I have gotten that fear of not sleeping as well after my light T onset. I would really go for absolute silence and darkness in my room before I got it and was kinda used to that being the case. Just make sure no further noise exposure comes your way like high wattage speakers, earphones and the likes. I feel better knowing I got low wattage speakers and volume limited (Etymotic ET5 max output 85db) earphones now. This because I had a spike making my T go up 4 fold for 12 days because of my old high wattage speakers..

I have read good things about these earplugs that do not enter the ear canal (which should thus be more safe):
https://www.amazon.com/Macks-Pillow-Soft-Silicone-Earplugs/dp/B003LZQGN6?th=1

Ok, now I need to go to sleep, but im stalling by typing this down, lol. Good luck. Stay calm and I could recommend meditating if you can for that.

 

Hi I was also thinking that...

I do not know the cause, I went through a big trauma and anxiety so I thought that was the cause... and you?

 

I also only get the pulsatile tinnitus when I am lying in bed. When i am standing I am fine. You have the ringing?

QUOTE="Jamesd, post: 349428, member: 33257"]Hannah, I read somewhere else on this forum that if someone overuses earplugs the brain can actually create sound - as if it feels there is actual hearing loss.

It has occurred to me, maybe that might be the cause of our tinnitus? Could be reverse logic, but maybe our solution is not to avoid sound. Clutching at straws... was yours caused by anything specific?[/QUOTE]

 

[/QUOTE]

Hi Hannah,

My tinnitus now has got to the stage where I barely notice it in the daytime - it's only ever really apparent if I plug my ears and then it's quite faint, but faint enough to annoy me!

But, it seems to come on loud when I wake up for reasons unknown. Have you had an MRI scan?

 

Welcome to the forum. Your tinnitus seems mild so take this as a positive. Keeping positive and calm will help your recovery or habituation easier or faster.

This may relate to blood pressure but most likely just due to a phenomenon called 'Awakening Response'. The brain is trying to scan for vital signs once we wake up but unfortunately the brain erroneously consider tinnitus being a vital sign too and so it zooms in or amplify it during waking causing us to feel it is more loud than usual.

 

Here is a much more detail explanation of 'Awakening Response' by a MD member posted a few years back:

“I have always felt it to be due to the role of the reticular formation in tinnitus perception. The reticular formation is a primitive structure in the brain stem. It's a "vital sign monitor." When you wake up, the RF checks to see whether or not you are alive! It looks for heartbeat, respirations, blood pressure, temperature - basic bodily signs. It does not care whether or not these signs are good or bad - just that they are present. And as far as the RF is concerned, tinnitus is part of "expected" body function in an individual suffering from severe intrusive tinnitus. So when you wake, your RF checks to see whether or not tinnitus is present. And if it doesn't immediately find the tinnitus, the RF seeks it with a vengeance - - especially in the post-nap state, when there has been inadequate REM sleep and when, therefore, the RF is on already "high alert" that something might not be quite right. Theoretically - very theoretically - this RF hyperactivity in seeking tinnitus, which in a person with severe intrusive tinnitus it equates with life, results in temporarily markedly augmented tinnitus perception.”

 

Hi Hannah,

My tinnitus now has got to the stage where I barely notice it in the daytime - it's only ever really apparent if I plug my ears and then it's quite faint, but faint enough to annoy me!

But, it seems to come on loud when I wake up for reasons unknown. Have you had an MRI scan?[/QUOTE]
Hi..

I had my ct angiogram. I have a carotid dissection. And that is what caused my tinnitus. You can Google it. So I know the cause. I am really upset as its high risk for stroke. I am on .

Atleast my tinnitus is beter now.