Not Doing Well, Need a Reason to Keep Going. Please Help.

Hello, All.

I just want to thank everyone for the support shown by this forum. Truly glad that I can come on here and be among others that are suffering just the same, although I wish none of us had to deal with this.

I really need a reason to keep going. Every time that I think I've struck rock bottom, I inevitably fall even further. Today, I've hit rock bottom yet again. I lost my job because of my T and H. Mostly my Hyperacusis. I've been severely depressed and suicidal for months now. My T started five months ago in August with just a mild ringing in my left year. In the months since, I've gotten ringing in my right ear and another tone in both ears that is louder than all of the other ringing.

My Hyperacusis, which started out essentially non-existent, has escalated to the point in which I have to wear earplugs around the house and any little noise causes me to jump. It's become difficult to do almost any task without earplugs and even then, the noise still seems too loud. My ears also alternate between feeling stuffed and my right eardrum seems to spasm with certain noises.

I've attempted more vitamins and supplements than I can count, I've tried acupuncture and massage, a TMJ splint, and Lexapro. Nothing has helped with my T and H. It continues to get worse despite the sound therapy suggested by an Audiologist that I consulted with.

I'm not sure how I am going to get and hold a job at this point. I was working from home for the last two months of my job and now have trouble even going out into the world some days. It will be almost impossible to get disability for this (I live in the US) and some days I wonder if it would be easier to just end it all. I've tried to get in to see a psychiatrist to get a stronger anti-depressant, but the soonest that one can see me is in March. I'm not sure what else to try or why my ears continue to worsen despite not being exposed to any "harmful" noise. Please help.

 

@Theater Ringing,
Tinnitus and Hyperacusis are hard to deal with and the unwanted emotions that come with it and coping with day to day things,parenting and working and getting enough sleep.
You have made the first step and so glad you found us here for support.
Try to get in see your doctor about antidepressants and if you have Mental Health where you live give them a ring and get the Crisis Support as they will really help you.
Try get in to see ENT and contact a depression service whom can help give you advice on getting disability till your feeling better.
Your ears are super insensitive and you need to get your ears use to daily sounds with support and Hyperacusis can be treated over time but no quick fix.
I would have your hearing tested also.
We are here around the clock to support you so your never alone.
So for the rest of today I would relax and make tomorrow the First new day of getting back on track and we will help you .
Love glynis x

 

Hi there
I’m so sorry that you are feeling so bad and that you’ve lost your job. I don’t have hyperacusis but I do have very horrible T. As you are so depressed and probably anxious? external noises will make you jumpy anyway. Are you clenching your teeth with anxiety? this can make your ears feel full. I do this myself as I get so stressed. Can you go to ER, I’m in the UK so it’s accident and emergency here. If you are thinking about not going on then you must tell someone and get urgent help. I’ve often thought this myself but somehow I’m still here. Please know that you are not alone, there are many of us struggling in this way. Eve

 

I am sorry that you are feeling this way. If you feel suicidal then possibly call a crisis - prevention hotline and seek help. If you lack income and need help, possibly look for support from churches, missions that help those that need financial help and possibly emotional support. Also there might be programs that assist low income/no income folks, so look around for that as well. Meds are great but they can also carry side effects too, so please be aware of that.

Tinnitus is a rollercoaster ride. You never really know what you are going to get, especially for folks that are new to it. Stay strong, this forum has some folks that been through the ringer and come here to show love and support for those that suffer from this horrible ordeal.

Never give up, things can get better

 

@Theater Ringing - So sorry my friend.
I’ve been there - lots of us have.
You could learn to do some meditation.
It does help, but it’s not immediate - it takes a bit of time and practice.
Take care
Jazzer x

 

Jusr to add to the good advice, it sounds like you are still stuck in the fight or flight loop where the anxiety is making the T worse. When we are stuck in a loop we have to change something.

Seeking help from professionals should help you remove any anxiety from sinister thoughts about your heath. Also see if there is anything you can do about life issues which may be causing anxiety.

Most people DO move on to happy ‘normal’ lives. It does take a lot of will power and time. Have a read of the Success Story section here to pick up some tips and try to keep away from any negativity!

Man hug from here.