Hello. My apologies for any mistakes I may or will make. lol I have never joined a forum, created a thread or dealt with anything like tinitus. I am a 36 year old, Male, Dad, Husband, Uncle, Brother, Son. I am a very "special" person. I have some issues (as most of us do) My main issue is, I have an anger problem. I enjoy my quiet time. My personal space and downtime. I used to sit in a room, with no tv on and just stare at the wall or out of the window and just enjoy silence. I have been going to see a counselor/therapist over the last few months for my anger, and so far so good. I have come a long way in a short period of time. I know I still have a very long way to go, but its nice to see progress.
I have always had great hearing. I could hear things no one else could. With no effort. I remember 6 months ago, laying in bed, watching tv and my wife asked me. "can you even hear that? I can't hear a single word they are saying." About 3 months ago, while at a restaurant, I noticed some anxiety from all of the noise. Almost like a sensory overload. And in that moment, I noticed that I couldn't make out exactly what my cousin across the table was saying to me. I thought there was too much noise. Shortly after that, I noticed a ringing in my left ear. Then it was my wife saying, "can you turn the tv down? I'm trying to sleep. Are you deaf?" lol Then the ringing got worse. I'm not sure if it got worse or I just became fixated on it. My anger still gets the best of me, and when the ringing gets too bad, I do not know what to do.
So off to the ENT I went. I did the hearing test, and the examination. The examination of my ears came back great. The sound test (don't quote me) came back that my left ear dropped about 30db from 4k-6 maybe 8k htz. I'll go back in a month and request a copy of my medical records, so I can clarify more if need be. I have a slight dip in my right ear at the same frequency but it was still in the "normal" range. I informed them that I have no recollection of any loud noise or trauma to my ears. I did tell them that I have shot guns (long ago and not often) without hearing protection. I used to do construction, but nothing prolonged or too crazy loud. Their concerned with the hearing loss only being in one ear and it happening so sudden with no trauma to record.
I go this Tuesday for an M.R.I. to rule out any tumors or "acoustic neuroma". I noted to them that I have not had any dizziness. I've had a few headaches, but nothing outside of the normal. Nothing that would seem irregular or cause any concern. Then I can go back on December 5th for my follow up with the ENT. I'm going to call tomorrow and see if I can be on a cancellation list or move my appointment up. This ringing sound is getting the best of me and I am at a loss.
I really feel like I have no options. Everything but a shower makes it worse. I have tried music, white noise, headphones, ear plugs, etc. I feel like this is going to make me or break me. I know how strong willed, and stubborn I am. I will not let this break me, but I would be a liar if I didn't admit that this is the WORST thing I have ever had to deal with, mentally. The thought of shoving a pencil in my ear actually sounded relieving the other day. I would rather be completely deaf and have no ringing in my ear than to be able to hear what I can and have to live with this.
They advised me that if I do have a tumor growing on the nerves of my inner ear that it may be correctable and it my not. They told me if it is not a tumor than I can take prescription meds (completely against that) or a hearing aid. I am all for trying a hearing aid. I will start another thread or look for one on hearing aid options and reviews from actual people who suffer from tinnitus. I am currently looking into mediation also. I think what I hate the most is, the fact that I have no more silence in my life. Sounds selfish to some. I don't ask for much in life. I'm a pretty simple person. I just wish there were a temporary relief from the ringing.
So far, drowning the ringing with white noise, or music seems to help, but its still noise and chaos in my head. And when the music stops (no pun intended lol) the noise is still there and it seems louder than before I put the headphones on. So today I tried foam ear plugs. They seem to work better for me than drowning the ringing sound out with more noise. I couldn't hear voices as well. Sound was a bit muffled, and I could still hear the ringing sound. But when I removed the ear plug, it seemed as normal volume noise was enough to make the ringing SEEM drowned out. So in my head the background noise was a bit more quiet but the ringing never stopped. It did seem more tolerable once the ear plugs were removed.
I'm up for any and all suggestions. Thank you to whomever took the time to read this vent/rant. Again, I will post a thread just asking for advise on coping skills, meditation, and hearing aid recommendations. I will work on getting the exact results/findings from my ENT so I can give more information if needed. I know it could be worse. I have been reading some of the threads about others and their stories. A lot of you have it worse than I do. I know I'm new to this and I'm hopeful it may get better, or my body/brain will learn to cope a little better. To all of you suffering, I'm sorry. I'm hear to listen (read lol) and help in any way that I can.
I have always had great hearing. I could hear things no one else could. With no effort. I remember 6 months ago, laying in bed, watching tv and my wife asked me. "can you even hear that? I can't hear a single word they are saying." About 3 months ago, while at a restaurant, I noticed some anxiety from all of the noise. Almost like a sensory overload. And in that moment, I noticed that I couldn't make out exactly what my cousin across the table was saying to me. I thought there was too much noise. Shortly after that, I noticed a ringing in my left ear. Then it was my wife saying, "can you turn the tv down? I'm trying to sleep. Are you deaf?" lol Then the ringing got worse. I'm not sure if it got worse or I just became fixated on it. My anger still gets the best of me, and when the ringing gets too bad, I do not know what to do.
So off to the ENT I went. I did the hearing test, and the examination. The examination of my ears came back great. The sound test (don't quote me) came back that my left ear dropped about 30db from 4k-6 maybe 8k htz. I'll go back in a month and request a copy of my medical records, so I can clarify more if need be. I have a slight dip in my right ear at the same frequency but it was still in the "normal" range. I informed them that I have no recollection of any loud noise or trauma to my ears. I did tell them that I have shot guns (long ago and not often) without hearing protection. I used to do construction, but nothing prolonged or too crazy loud. Their concerned with the hearing loss only being in one ear and it happening so sudden with no trauma to record.
I go this Tuesday for an M.R.I. to rule out any tumors or "acoustic neuroma". I noted to them that I have not had any dizziness. I've had a few headaches, but nothing outside of the normal. Nothing that would seem irregular or cause any concern. Then I can go back on December 5th for my follow up with the ENT. I'm going to call tomorrow and see if I can be on a cancellation list or move my appointment up. This ringing sound is getting the best of me and I am at a loss.
I really feel like I have no options. Everything but a shower makes it worse. I have tried music, white noise, headphones, ear plugs, etc. I feel like this is going to make me or break me. I know how strong willed, and stubborn I am. I will not let this break me, but I would be a liar if I didn't admit that this is the WORST thing I have ever had to deal with, mentally. The thought of shoving a pencil in my ear actually sounded relieving the other day. I would rather be completely deaf and have no ringing in my ear than to be able to hear what I can and have to live with this.
They advised me that if I do have a tumor growing on the nerves of my inner ear that it may be correctable and it my not. They told me if it is not a tumor than I can take prescription meds (completely against that) or a hearing aid. I am all for trying a hearing aid. I will start another thread or look for one on hearing aid options and reviews from actual people who suffer from tinnitus. I am currently looking into mediation also. I think what I hate the most is, the fact that I have no more silence in my life. Sounds selfish to some. I don't ask for much in life. I'm a pretty simple person. I just wish there were a temporary relief from the ringing.
So far, drowning the ringing with white noise, or music seems to help, but its still noise and chaos in my head. And when the music stops (no pun intended lol) the noise is still there and it seems louder than before I put the headphones on. So today I tried foam ear plugs. They seem to work better for me than drowning the ringing sound out with more noise. I couldn't hear voices as well. Sound was a bit muffled, and I could still hear the ringing sound. But when I removed the ear plug, it seemed as normal volume noise was enough to make the ringing SEEM drowned out. So in my head the background noise was a bit more quiet but the ringing never stopped. It did seem more tolerable once the ear plugs were removed.
I'm up for any and all suggestions. Thank you to whomever took the time to read this vent/rant. Again, I will post a thread just asking for advise on coping skills, meditation, and hearing aid recommendations. I will work on getting the exact results/findings from my ENT so I can give more information if needed. I know it could be worse. I have been reading some of the threads about others and their stories. A lot of you have it worse than I do. I know I'm new to this and I'm hopeful it may get better, or my body/brain will learn to cope a little better. To all of you suffering, I'm sorry. I'm hear to listen (read lol) and help in any way that I can.
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